- Joined
- Sep 14, 2013
- Messages
- 1,016
Hey guys,
Recently had a discussion with my dad because he seemed to disapprove my gf. The reason he doesn't approve the relationship is because of my gf's family background. Her parents are separated, and she has 3 older brothers. She's kinda close to her brothers, but not so much to her dad. However, I think the reason my dad doesn't approve is because when he was young, my grandpa didn't approve one of his gf because of her family background too. When my dad told me this story, I kinda feel sorry for him. However now he's doing the same thing to me cuz he thinks it's for the best...he can't really see that my circumstances are completely different to his...and he can't make a judgement like that. Plus he doesn't know my gf as well as me and he's placing a lot of assumptions and speculations about what problems could potentially happen in the future....So I calmly understand where he's coming and even agree with him that family does matter, but he still wouldn't let my gf come over to stay with us during the New Year's, which means I won't see her one last time before we break up (I'm moving away and we both don't want to do long distance). Even after I told him this, he's still stuborn af, and think we're better off just break up now. He doesn't seem to understand I want to treasure the time we have left together, and he thinks since there's no future, we should just break up. He gave me a whole list of worst case scenario, like my gf follow me and gives me trouble or even try to kill me if she can't have me...etc, which is irrational and stupid. Anyway, his whole argument makes sense, but is completely irrelevant at the same time, because my gf and I both know we'll end things eventually, but just wanted to have one last crazy time together.....Later on, I had another discussion with my dad and asked him if a person's background is really that important in a long term relationship. and he said yes. However, I think if your personality and beliefs match that with your partner, then their family background shouldn't matter too much in a long term relationship....Hope some more experienced members here can shed some light here =) Does your partner's family background matter in a long term relationship/marriage? I have to question if my dad's belief is accurate or not. I have a feeling that he was hurt when his dad rejected his gf and now he's numb to how I'm feeling.
Cheers
Recently had a discussion with my dad because he seemed to disapprove my gf. The reason he doesn't approve the relationship is because of my gf's family background. Her parents are separated, and she has 3 older brothers. She's kinda close to her brothers, but not so much to her dad. However, I think the reason my dad doesn't approve is because when he was young, my grandpa didn't approve one of his gf because of her family background too. When my dad told me this story, I kinda feel sorry for him. However now he's doing the same thing to me cuz he thinks it's for the best...he can't really see that my circumstances are completely different to his...and he can't make a judgement like that. Plus he doesn't know my gf as well as me and he's placing a lot of assumptions and speculations about what problems could potentially happen in the future....So I calmly understand where he's coming and even agree with him that family does matter, but he still wouldn't let my gf come over to stay with us during the New Year's, which means I won't see her one last time before we break up (I'm moving away and we both don't want to do long distance). Even after I told him this, he's still stuborn af, and think we're better off just break up now. He doesn't seem to understand I want to treasure the time we have left together, and he thinks since there's no future, we should just break up. He gave me a whole list of worst case scenario, like my gf follow me and gives me trouble or even try to kill me if she can't have me...etc, which is irrational and stupid. Anyway, his whole argument makes sense, but is completely irrelevant at the same time, because my gf and I both know we'll end things eventually, but just wanted to have one last crazy time together.....Later on, I had another discussion with my dad and asked him if a person's background is really that important in a long term relationship. and he said yes. However, I think if your personality and beliefs match that with your partner, then their family background shouldn't matter too much in a long term relationship....Hope some more experienced members here can shed some light here =) Does your partner's family background matter in a long term relationship/marriage? I have to question if my dad's belief is accurate or not. I have a feeling that he was hurt when his dad rejected his gf and now he's numb to how I'm feeling.
Cheers
