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Dramas: does it move you quicker towards the commitment point?

lux7

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Chase in the article about drama (here: https://www.girlschase.com/content/women-and-drama) says that it's good to "never pass the commitment point" and teaches how to handle drama correctly.

Great article, and it just had me thinking: if you handle dramas right, even without rewarding drama, don't you move quicker towards the commitment point anyway?
I mean, you're still showing qualities by handling drama well and any after drama without breakup only confirms you're still together despite the fight and most of the times only moves you towards either commitment or towards the girl asking for more commitment.

I mean there's no other way of course, if you let drama simmer it's worst, but yeah, just an observation that you can't actually avoid drama from moving you closer to the commitment point...
 
a good date brings a smile to your lips... and hers

Franco

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luc,

You're asking one question here, but then answering a different one:

I mean there's no other way of course, if you let drama simmer it's worst, but yeah, just an observation that you can't actually avoid drama from moving you closer to the commitment point...

If the question is, "will handling drama correctly stop you from moving closer to the commitment point? Then the answer is "no," it will not. You are basically always moving toward a commitment point with women (should you continue to keep seeing them sexually), so you should always assume that is the case and that eventually a woman will push for commitment or have to let you go.

Now, if the question is, "will handling drama correctly slow down the process of moving you toward the commitment point?" The answer, most of the time, is "yes." This is why you want to understand how to handle drama so that you keep things at a pace that is under your control. If you handle drama incorrectly, you run the risk of her "trapping" you in a relationship much sooner than you would have liked to, or you run the risk of having her realize you're not relationship material because you don't care enough, which causes her to leave you.

So, that is the distinction I wanted to make here.

- Franco
 

lux7

Cro-Magnon Man
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Yes Franco, what I meant was that drama in general, even if handled correctly, might move you quicker towards the commitment point.

Just a thought of mine, because it makes her go through an emotional roller coaster that ends on a positive note and that makes her even more attached to you.
What happens is: at the beginning of the drama she's angry at you, lashes out, you keep it quiet, she calms down, you show her you actually care for her and... And that pushes her even closer to you.

Actually, badly handled drama might at times push the commitment point further away in the sense that she might have some more reserves about you.
 

Franco

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luc,

Right.

Drama in general is a sign of deep-seated emotions toward you, and whether those are "good" or "bad" emotions doesn't really matter -- if she has them, it's because she reasonably cares about what you think about her and where things are going between you two.

Here's a common quote that you might have heard before:

Elie Wiesel said:
"The opposite of love is not hate; it's indifference."

In other words, if a girl shows NO emotion toward you, then it's a sign she doesn't really care much about you.

And... it's a true quote. ;)

- Franco
 

Tim Iron

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@ Franco: that is a funny caricature cartoon of you :)
 

daviddreamer

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lucifer7 said:
Chase in the article about drama (here: https://www.girlschase.com/content/women-and-drama) says that it's good to "never pass the commitment point" and teaches how to handle drama correctly.

Great article, and it just had me thinking: if you handle dramas right, even without rewarding drama, don't you move quicker towards the commitment point anyway?
I mean, you're still showing qualities by handling drama well and any after drama without breakup only confirms you're still together despite the fight and most of the times only moves you towards either commitment or towards the girl asking for more commitment.

I mean there's no other way of course, if you let drama simmer it's worst, but yeah, just an observation that you can't actually avoid drama from moving you closer to the commitment point...

Let the woman push for the commitment. It is your choice whether you go to the next stage or not. If you stay at the same stage for a really long time, naturally, expect more and more drama. The woman will eventually give in to your demands (only to fight later at some point) or walk.

If a vaguely recall, as a real world example, Eugene Simmons (guy from KISS) kept his long-term relationship really really long. They finally tied the knot after something like 25 years of LTR only for the woman to divorce after one year....just something to keep in mind.
 
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