- Joined
- Jul 23, 2017
- Messages
- 187
Quarantine has given me some time to get some stuff done (which also made me busy in a funny way). So this is something that's been on my to do list for a while (catch up with field reports 
)
Sometime about two years back in mid December of 2018, I was on a little dating site called OK Cupid. (Still am as an experiment to see which app works best for me) One day I logged on and found a woman my age had liked and messaged me. She seemed fake and only had one profile picture but her message about a reference I made in my bio caught my eye and so I went with it.
It went something like this:
Her: "By the way, at the end of your summary you said 'don't be another brick in the wall' Was that reference to Pink Floyd?"
Me: "Yes, it was! It's nice finally meeting someone who knows what I'm talking about"
Her: "Yeah, I'm a pretty big fan of classic rock and classic movies"
Me: "Really- you got any favorite bands?"
That went on for about an hour or so until I said I had to go and she stopped me for a second to ask for my Snapchat. I do have one just to talk to girls on (I'm not a big social media user at that point in time) so I give her it and we add each other.
The next night, I'm leaving work when I turn my phone on only to find a text from her waiting for me.
"Heyyy"
I hop in my car and shoot her a message back before starting my drive home.
"Hey (name), how's you night going- as busy as mine? Currently on my way home from work"
About halfway home (15 minutes or so) I get a reply from her but didn't bother checking until I got back and was off the road. We ended up getting caught up in a conversation that seemed to go on forever but neither of us really seemed bothered by this. We just got along really well. A little too well, there had to be something wrong with her, right? I figured she was either a scammer or just ugly in ways that her one picture couldn't show. It was getting late and we were both still somehow curious. (I don't remember this entirely, just some parts and some stuff I wrote down since I write about my life a lot. I'm filling in some small blanks). Thus we agreed to video chat the next night.
When that time finally comes, she texts me she's ready. I hop onto Skype and give her a call. I sat on the edge of my seat while I waited for the connection to clear up and the screen to go from blue to live with her looking at me from the other side.
I'm breathless for a moment that goes unnoticed. She's one of the most beautiful women I had seen in a long time. She's a young Joan jett look alike with hair cut just short of her shoulders, dyed blonde. She had a skinny hourglass figure and seemed to prefer a 90's grunge style with a red plaid shirt unbuttoned low as a v-neck.
I start with a peace sign. "Yellow!"
"Hi!" She replies mirroring my gesture.
We talk for about an hour about music, siblings, how many things we had in common, and so on. We would've gone on longer too if her friends hadn't come knocking at her door. Another hour later, she apparently slips away from her friends and texts me.
"Come save me from these aliens" and sends me a video of her hiding in her closet with her dog in her arms "We're hiding here, in the dark. Because we're vampires."
Me: "I would but where is here? I seem to be a bit lost at the moment."
Her: "Find the way"
Me: "I was hoping you'd give me some sense of direction"
Her: "Follow the light"
Me: "Following the light is an odd way of finding a vampire"
Her: "I'm a special kind of vampire"
Me: "I noticed, vampire lady"
Her: "My new nickname?"
Me: "You catch on fast "
Her: "I tend to do that ;P "
We ended up video chatting another hour later after we both have some time to grab some grub. By the end of that night she wanted to talk to me again the next night. We ended up talking just about every night of the week. On the last night she asks me in a text after we finish talking
"Hey, I don't want to scare you off or anything but I was thinking we should meet up." (The reason I hadn't asked yet was because I was still inexperienced with online stuff and neither of us had actually met anyone in person that we met online yet)
I replied, "Actually I was thinking the same thing. What day works best for you?"
Her: "Just send me your schedule"
Me: "I'm free Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday but that's really about it."
Her: "Monday works fine for me"
Me: "Cool, say 5pm at (a location between us)"
Her: "Sure "
Me: "Cool see you then!"
Monday comes and she ends up having to cancel since she is without a car or license and one of her five sisters couldn't drive her. She was so apologetic it was almost annoying (almost). I messaged her back
"(name), hey! It's cool, if you can't get a ride, you can't get a ride. No worries"
The same night she video calls me in next to nothing and we chat for a while before she asks to reschedule. We ended up settling on Wednesday somewhere else closer to her home at 6pm.
Wednesday comes along and I get out of school then drive up to the place we agreed to meet at (which was an hour away) with her texting me as I went. I read none of them until I got to the place. They were all really nervous toned with her being overly specific about where she is and to let her know when I'm close.
I let her know I was there but assumed she already knew since I'm usually pretty hard to miss with the radio on
I put on my red leather biker jacket (which I had shown her in another chat prior) and walk towards the place (which was a bowling alley). I stop halfway when I notice she's texting me again. Apparently she was already waiting with her older sister in a white SUV I parked directly in front of (we would later come to know that car as the soccer mom mobile )
I give her a wave and wait in the cold night while she grabs her purse and denim jacket. She walks up to me as her sister drives off. Turns out she's only just barely shorter than I am.
She says to me in her laid back voice "Hey, so... I'm not really much of a bowler so if you want to go somewhere else..."
Me: "Yeah, sure. Just let me use the bathroom first, driving an hour really makes you need to tinkle."
Her: "Sure!"
Me: "Alright" I say starting off in the direction of the restrooms inside after patting her on the shoulder
Her: "That's all I get? No Hug?
Me: "Alllright!" I say with a laugh and give her a full hug before releasing, leaving my arm around her shoulder.
Her: "Yeah, we're buddies now."
Me: "Of course, Vampire lady. We've only known each other for like a hundred years now."
Her: "So now you're a vampire too?"
Me: "Vampire wizard."
We go off into rambling and joking for another minute before we walk in and we have no clue where a bathroom is
She begins looking around as I already was "I don't know where the bathrooms are... oh wait, I think they're back there!" She say pointing out the women's restroom in the back of the bowling alley where honestly, no one would even bother looking.
Me: "I'm not going in the women's restroom."
Her: "I'll go with you! No one will notice, just go!"
Me: "Ladies first."
She enters and I just stand outside observing my surroundings until she comes back out about a minute later.
Her: "I thought you where coming in!"
Me: "I was, but that's there." I reply pointing out the security camera pointed on the door of restroom.
Her: "C'mon, nobodies watching!"
I looked back at the crowd then look at her and the bathroom, upon reflection we probably could've gone in without trouble. Even if there was, we would've just gotten kicked out.
Me: "Is it just like, a one toilet bathroom with a lock and all?"
Her: "Yeah, there's only one toilet in there. There's a stall and everything."
Me: "Alright, but only if you go with me."
Her: "Why do I have to go with you? What am I you're mother?"
Me: I would've cracked a joke but I was too busy watching the crowd.
Her: "C'mon, we look so sketchy just standing back here."
Me: "One second." I say as I walk around the corner suspecting the men's room to be there.
I was right to suspect such as there was a men's room around the corner without a door with a urinal in clear view of the open doorway
I simply helped myself then washed my hands before reconvening with my date who was only just putting her shoe back on after thinking she had something in it as she would explain as soon as she noticed me walking back.
Me: "Yeah, yeah. Here, there's something you gotta see" I say as I guide her back to the empty and open men's room.
Her: "Where are you- oh my gosh!" She only just manages to express her surprise before the laughter follows and she directs it directly into my shoulder while I laugh with her.
Me: "Alright, enough jibber jabber. Let's get out of here."
She follows me back outside and uses my favored move "It's so cold" before pressing her body against mine as we walk to the car. Upon reaching it, she falls over the curb bringing me with her. I end up landing with my back on the hood of my car and her on top of me. We pause and lock eyes. I notice her eyes run to my lips and from there the rest was almost automatic. Her lips are soft and I can hear her breathing heavy, I stop and pull my head back and just look deep into her eyes only get lost there for a moment. She smiles and we continue, nibbling, one lip at a time. Eventually, she can't wait any longer and begins trying to swallow my mouth whole. I felt a bit of tongue and return what's given before stopping once more. I look at the car, then her.
Me: "Alright, that's it. Get in."
Her: "Okay..."
I jump into the drivers seat and the radio comes back louder than ever with classic rock n' roll before we buckle up and I speed away into the dark private parking behind the building. Apparently this was where school buses parked because one was looking right at me with it's headlights.
Me: "Care for an audience?"
Her: "Shut up." She speaks with a laugh before coming back for another make out session.
Although this time she pauses and looks around, "we should go somewhere else". Aside from the lit parking lot behind us and the dark storage units in full view of the windshield, no one would see us.
Me: "It's fine, we're in the dark. No one's going to see us."
I leave the radio on and we climb into the back seat of my convertible and continue kissing before she pauses again and again with one confession after another. Funny enough I had the same confessions for the most part or was at least able to relate in a more minor way. One of which came when I began to remove her pants and she told me as I felt her scars. I confess I had made an attempt as well (although not in the same way). We tell our stories and hug... and then continue the make out session. I move her hands down south once our clothes are off. After a while she decides she wants to give me some head. I lay back and push the passenger seat up so she has room.
A little while later (about an hour), we take a breather and cuddle. Her body resting on mine in the back seat. Smooth and warm, we could feel each other's heartbeat as she rested her head on my chest and held my hand on her breast. We were both trying not to fall asleep at this point.
Although this became easy after we began kissing once more, we rubbed noses. "Eskimo kisses" She explains softly. I liked this and copied. She laughed, "You're gonna remember me for that!"
"I'm gonna remember you for your awesomeness." I reply. She lays back down with me in the back seat. "I really hope we see each other again."
(Fuck-up numereo uno coming in 3...2...1...)
Me: "I do too."
Her: "No you don't"
Me: "I do!"
Her: "Yeah, but there's other girls"
Me: "They're nothing like you..."
Her: "You don't mean that."
Me: "I do! Here, if you don't believe me, mark me."
She goes to my neck and gets to work, it stings like a pinch. I feel her bite a bit then the tongue meets skin and it's done. She comes back up and we get back to a light make out session with her already on top of me as I sunk into the seat. A could swear a belt buckle was trying trying to squeeze up my ass but we later found that to be my shoe. Kicked my own ass with my own shoe More so, my own words I would later find and learn. We continue making out and she starts to bite at my lips to the point that it draws blood. The woman was eating me alive.
Some time later, she lays there on top of me with the street lights glowing in blue across her face with the lined shadows of the back window. She looked deep into my eyes and eventually it felt like my sole. "You have nice eyes... cute." She says tapping my nose and playing with my face. "You're not so bad yourself" I say tapping her nose back. She smiles and plays with my hair, her fingers run through it "It's so soft..."
Me: "Thank you"
She come down to me and lays a big ol' kiss on the cheek, fore-playing what would've come next if lights hadn't come on in the storage unit in front of us. I hop into the drivers seat with nothing but a condom on (figured we're about to get around to it), buckle up and wait for her to do the same before speeding off. I drove fast and recklessly, my brain bathed in what felt like ecstasy. We end up in a school parking lot. Noticing a trend, I speak
Me: "It looks like we have a theme tonight."
Her: "Back to school?"
Me: "Great minds think alike..."
We hop back into the back, the heat still on, the radio still loud.
About an hour later, we find ourselves exhausted again. Resting the same way we were before. A song comes on we both know by heart (It was Foo fighters) and we sing in what seemed like perfect harmony while holding eye contact.
The songs get cut off by some county music and we both express disappointment in the radio man's choice of music (Nothing against that if that's what you like), look at each other, then go again, this time I take the top and her eyes roll back as if her mind just went elsewhere. (I gave her some lip service )
After that I beg for her to let me give more. She says no at first, but I keep asking and finally she says yes. I try and penetrate but she was tight and I couldn't seem to maneuver well enough to make entry and we try for a while but end up giving up on that. (Fuck-up numero dos)
I later figured out the entry bit another day
The next thing I remember is we're cuddling again, now overheated. Making plans to meet again, and to my own surprise I bring up the relationship talk. (Fuck-up numero three shut-up, I don't know Spanish)
"You want a relationship?" She asks looking up at me with her brown eyes.
Me: "Yeah, don't you?"
Her: "Yeah!"
Me: "Awesome..."
I roll over too heated to continue. She looks at the time, 8:49pm.
Her: "I gotta go, my parents are gonna kill me."
Me: "One more.."
Her: "Alright"
Her head goes down for a few moments and for once, I kick back.
About thirty seconds later, she comes back up "Alright let's go"
Me: "Wha- I didn't-"
Her: "I did, c'mon."
Me: "Jus-"
Her: "I will bite you..."
Me: "I believe you..."
She throws my black boxers at me "Tidey whities" as she calls them and clothes herself again.
Me: "No bra?"
Her: "Nah"
Me: "Right, those torture devices."
Her: "Exactly!"
I smell condom on her breath and make her aware of this.
Her: "Are you saying I have bad breath!?"
Me: "No, I'm just saying your parents might question you on it."
Her: "You have any mints?"
Me: "No, I have gum." I struggle to get it and give up "Just take mine"
Her: "Alright"
We share one more kiss with a gift before I suggest:
"Wanna drive with the top down?" I ask her, knowing she always wanted a convertible for the same reasons as me, even said it the same way I did when asked.
Her: "People are gonna think we're crazy but yeah."
Me: "Fuck them... not really, although you could fuck me again."
She laughs and says "Drive!"
Me: "Eye eye, capt'n!"
I put the top down and pull out of the parking lot.
As I pull out I look over at the building and shout to no one "HEY JANITORS, GET YOUR EYE'S CHECKED!" Then speed off as she set the gps to the right location and puts it back. I look over at her living her dream with the wind blowing through her hair as it is mine. Looks like freedom.
Me: "Where do you wanna go?"
Her: "You know I have to.."
Me: "No you don't. We could run away together!"
Her: "That's sweet, but I really do."
Me: "Oh, alright. Just sayin' ,the world is our oyster."
She says nothing just watching me drive and I look over at her. Wind still blowing through her hair, a look in her eye that makes my heart jump like it's our last night alive. Would've been the best way to go. It was yet another movie moment, I'll never forget that look.
Eventually when we get back I tell her she's got an excuse to have messed up hair now and mess it up even more with my hand before parking. I get a kiss on the cheek but nothing more, her sister is laughing heavily in her soccer mom mobile. I tell her to take my jacket and give it back when we see each other again since I can tell she's freezing now. She say's I'll need it more. I insist but so does she. I let her out of the car and watch as she waves goodbye while her sister takes her away.
With a smile on my face, I put the top back up and plug my phone into the charger before driving off to a gas station to relieve myself and pick up some breath mints. Still have some of those fuckers in the car!
I get home and don't even bother to take off my jacket before laying down. Her scent covers me like she's still there. My neck is soar with her mark. My brain is swimming in too deep. I get a text from her "Hey, thanks for tonight"
Me: "My honor and privilege"
Her: "How's your neck feeling?"
I take a picture and send her it "Left a mark"
Her: "I'll have to make it darker next time"
Me: "So there will be a next time..."
Her: "Maybe... I've already said too much"
We talk a little longer and wish each other goodnight.
From that night on, things died off more so every night and I became paranoid like a wild animal in a cage. Eventually it was the night before we were to meet again and watch a movie at my place, I texted her to video chat about where to pick her up and she said she needed to shower first. An hour went by, then two. Eventually I couldn't push the paranoia away anymore, I put down my pencil and paper and checked my media. It said she had blocked me, our conversation was deleted on the site of which we met. I shot her a message on Skype, she saw it but with no reply.
I sent one message asking to her not to end it like this. To at least text. A few minutes later, I got a hold of myself to accept what I had predicted in the car that night. It feels like a curse I thought she may have been able to break but we don't live in Hollywood romances. It's two in the morning when I feel the need to say goodbye on my own terms, knowing she'd almost surely never read it.
I left a three paragraph long message basically just saying goodbye. (yes, I'm wincing at this too next time I'll just use one word, if any)
I went through the usual steps of getting through heartbreak. Focusing on literally anything else, getting rid of any reminders of her, and eventually talking to another girl (like two or three days later).
I also found myself talking a little more playful like I did when I was around her which I almost never did prior (at least not as well or as much). Almost like she took a piece of my sole and left me with a bit of hers...
I always wonder how the next will show up the most recent. I have doubts in the back of my head, but I know for a fact it's going to happen. It's just a matter of when. Either way, it's just nice to finally get this one done. I know this was a really long post (not sure if most reports are like that since I don't write many) let me know what I could've left out, what you want more of. Some lessons I might have missed (if any). Whatever, I probably won't bite your head off
Anyway, if you take nothing else from this, take this at least:
Don't just throw yourself right into a relationship like I did. We are wild animals, we're not meant to be tamed so easily. It's just not natural.
)Sometime about two years back in mid December of 2018, I was on a little dating site called OK Cupid. (Still am as an experiment to see which app works best for me) One day I logged on and found a woman my age had liked and messaged me. She seemed fake and only had one profile picture but her message about a reference I made in my bio caught my eye and so I went with it.
It went something like this:
Her: "By the way, at the end of your summary you said 'don't be another brick in the wall' Was that reference to Pink Floyd?"
Me: "Yes, it was! It's nice finally meeting someone who knows what I'm talking about"
Her: "Yeah, I'm a pretty big fan of classic rock and classic movies"
Me: "Really- you got any favorite bands?"
That went on for about an hour or so until I said I had to go and she stopped me for a second to ask for my Snapchat. I do have one just to talk to girls on (I'm not a big social media user at that point in time) so I give her it and we add each other.
The next night, I'm leaving work when I turn my phone on only to find a text from her waiting for me.
"Heyyy"
I hop in my car and shoot her a message back before starting my drive home.
"Hey (name), how's you night going- as busy as mine? Currently on my way home from work"
About halfway home (15 minutes or so) I get a reply from her but didn't bother checking until I got back and was off the road. We ended up getting caught up in a conversation that seemed to go on forever but neither of us really seemed bothered by this. We just got along really well. A little too well, there had to be something wrong with her, right? I figured she was either a scammer or just ugly in ways that her one picture couldn't show. It was getting late and we were both still somehow curious. (I don't remember this entirely, just some parts and some stuff I wrote down since I write about my life a lot. I'm filling in some small blanks). Thus we agreed to video chat the next night.
When that time finally comes, she texts me she's ready. I hop onto Skype and give her a call. I sat on the edge of my seat while I waited for the connection to clear up and the screen to go from blue to live with her looking at me from the other side.
I'm breathless for a moment that goes unnoticed. She's one of the most beautiful women I had seen in a long time. She's a young Joan jett look alike with hair cut just short of her shoulders, dyed blonde. She had a skinny hourglass figure and seemed to prefer a 90's grunge style with a red plaid shirt unbuttoned low as a v-neck.
I start with a peace sign. "Yellow!"
"Hi!" She replies mirroring my gesture.
We talk for about an hour about music, siblings, how many things we had in common, and so on. We would've gone on longer too if her friends hadn't come knocking at her door. Another hour later, she apparently slips away from her friends and texts me.
"Come save me from these aliens" and sends me a video of her hiding in her closet with her dog in her arms "We're hiding here, in the dark. Because we're vampires."
Me: "I would but where is here? I seem to be a bit lost at the moment."
Her: "Find the way"
Me: "I was hoping you'd give me some sense of direction"
Her: "Follow the light"
Me: "Following the light is an odd way of finding a vampire"
Her: "I'm a special kind of vampire"
Me: "I noticed, vampire lady"
Her: "My new nickname?"
Me: "You catch on fast
"Her: "I tend to do that ;P "
We ended up video chatting another hour later after we both have some time to grab some grub. By the end of that night she wanted to talk to me again the next night. We ended up talking just about every night of the week. On the last night she asks me in a text after we finish talking
"Hey, I don't want to scare you off or anything but I was thinking we should meet up." (The reason I hadn't asked yet was because I was still inexperienced with online stuff and neither of us had actually met anyone in person that we met online yet)
I replied, "Actually I was thinking the same thing. What day works best for you?"
Her: "Just send me your schedule"
Me: "I'm free Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday but that's really about it."
Her: "Monday works fine for me"
Me: "Cool, say 5pm at (a location between us)"
Her: "Sure
"Me: "Cool see you then!"
Monday comes and she ends up having to cancel since she is without a car or license and one of her five sisters couldn't drive her. She was so apologetic it was almost annoying (almost). I messaged her back
"(name), hey! It's cool, if you can't get a ride, you can't get a ride. No worries"
The same night she video calls me in next to nothing and we chat for a while before she asks to reschedule. We ended up settling on Wednesday somewhere else closer to her home at 6pm.
Wednesday comes along and I get out of school then drive up to the place we agreed to meet at (which was an hour away) with her texting me as I went. I read none of them until I got to the place. They were all really nervous toned with her being overly specific about where she is and to let her know when I'm close.
I let her know I was there but assumed she already knew since I'm usually pretty hard to miss with the radio on
I put on my red leather biker jacket (which I had shown her in another chat prior) and walk towards the place (which was a bowling alley). I stop halfway when I notice she's texting me again. Apparently she was already waiting with her older sister in a white SUV I parked directly in front of
(we would later come to know that car as the soccer mom mobile ) I give her a wave and wait in the cold night while she grabs her purse and denim jacket. She walks up to me as her sister drives off. Turns out she's only just barely shorter than I am.
She says to me in her laid back voice "Hey, so... I'm not really much of a bowler so if you want to go somewhere else..."
Me: "Yeah, sure. Just let me use the bathroom first, driving an hour really makes you need to tinkle."
Her: "Sure!"
Me: "Alright" I say starting off in the direction of the restrooms inside after patting her on the shoulder
Her: "That's all I get? No Hug?
Me: "Alllright!" I say with a laugh and give her a full hug before releasing, leaving my arm around her shoulder.
Her: "Yeah, we're buddies now."
Me: "Of course, Vampire lady. We've only known each other for like a hundred years now."
Her: "So now you're a vampire too?"
Me: "Vampire wizard."
We go off into rambling and joking for another minute before we walk in and we have no clue where a bathroom is
She begins looking around as I already was "I don't know where the bathrooms are... oh wait, I think they're back there!" She say pointing out the women's restroom in the back of the bowling alley where honestly, no one would even bother looking.
Me: "I'm not going in the women's restroom."
Her: "I'll go with you! No one will notice, just go!"
Me: "Ladies first."
She enters and I just stand outside observing my surroundings until she comes back out about a minute later.
Her: "I thought you where coming in!"
Me: "I was, but that's there." I reply pointing out the security camera pointed on the door of restroom.
Her: "C'mon, nobodies watching!"
I looked back at the crowd then look at her and the bathroom, upon reflection we probably could've gone in without trouble. Even if there was, we would've just gotten kicked out.
Me: "Is it just like, a one toilet bathroom with a lock and all?"
Her: "Yeah, there's only one toilet in there. There's a stall and everything."
Me: "Alright, but only if you go with me."
Her: "Why do I have to go with you? What am I you're mother?"
Me: I would've cracked a joke but I was too busy watching the crowd.
Her: "C'mon, we look so sketchy just standing back here."
Me: "One second." I say as I walk around the corner suspecting the men's room to be there.
I was right to suspect such as there was a men's room around the corner without a door with a urinal in clear view of the open doorway
I simply helped myself then washed my hands before reconvening with my date who was only just putting her shoe back on after thinking she had something in it as she would explain as soon as she noticed me walking back.
Me: "Yeah, yeah. Here, there's something you gotta see" I say as I guide her back to the empty and open men's room.
Her: "Where are you- oh my gosh!" She only just manages to express her surprise before the laughter follows and she directs it directly into my shoulder while I laugh with her.
Me: "Alright, enough jibber jabber. Let's get out of here."
She follows me back outside and uses my favored move "It's so cold" before pressing her body against mine as we walk to the car. Upon reaching it, she falls over the curb bringing me with her. I end up landing with my back on the hood of my car and her on top of me. We pause and lock eyes. I notice her eyes run to my lips and from there the rest was almost automatic. Her lips are soft and I can hear her breathing heavy, I stop and pull my head back and just look deep into her eyes only get lost there for a moment. She smiles and we continue, nibbling, one lip at a time. Eventually, she can't wait any longer and begins trying to swallow my mouth whole. I felt a bit of tongue and return what's given before stopping once more. I look at the car, then her.
Me: "Alright, that's it. Get in."
Her: "Okay..."
I jump into the drivers seat and the radio comes back louder than ever with classic rock n' roll before we buckle up and I speed away into the dark private parking behind the building. Apparently this was where school buses parked because one was looking right at me with it's headlights.
Me: "Care for an audience?"
Her: "Shut up." She speaks with a laugh before coming back for another make out session.
Although this time she pauses and looks around, "we should go somewhere else". Aside from the lit parking lot behind us and the dark storage units in full view of the windshield, no one would see us.
Me: "It's fine, we're in the dark. No one's going to see us."
I leave the radio on and we climb into the back seat of my convertible and continue kissing before she pauses again and again with one confession after another. Funny enough I had the same confessions for the most part or was at least able to relate in a more minor way. One of which came when I began to remove her pants and she told me as I felt her scars. I confess I had made an attempt as well (although not in the same way). We tell our stories and hug... and then continue the make out session. I move her hands down south once our clothes are off. After a while she decides she wants to give me some head. I lay back and push the passenger seat up so she has room.
A little while later (about an hour), we take a breather and cuddle. Her body resting on mine in the back seat. Smooth and warm, we could feel each other's heartbeat as she rested her head on my chest and held my hand on her breast. We were both trying not to fall asleep at this point.
Although this became easy after we began kissing once more, we rubbed noses. "Eskimo kisses" She explains softly. I liked this and copied. She laughed, "You're gonna remember me for that!"
"I'm gonna remember you for your awesomeness." I reply. She lays back down with me in the back seat. "I really hope we see each other again."
(Fuck-up numereo uno coming in 3...2...1...)
Me: "I do too."
Her: "No you don't"
Me: "I do!"
Her: "Yeah, but there's other girls"
Me: "They're nothing like you..."
Her: "You don't mean that."
Me: "I do! Here, if you don't believe me, mark me."
She goes to my neck and gets to work, it stings like a pinch. I feel her bite a bit then the tongue meets skin and it's done. She comes back up and we get back to a light make out session with her already on top of me as I sunk into the seat. A could swear a belt buckle was trying trying to squeeze up my ass but we later found that to be my shoe. Kicked my own ass with my own shoe
More so, my own words I would later find and learn. We continue making out and she starts to bite at my lips to the point that it draws blood. The woman was eating me alive.Some time later, she lays there on top of me with the street lights glowing in blue across her face with the lined shadows of the back window. She looked deep into my eyes and eventually it felt like my sole. "You have nice eyes... cute." She says tapping my nose and playing with my face. "You're not so bad yourself" I say tapping her nose back. She smiles and plays with my hair, her fingers run through it "It's so soft..."
Me: "Thank you"
She come down to me and lays a big ol' kiss on the cheek, fore-playing what would've come next if lights hadn't come on in the storage unit in front of us. I hop into the drivers seat with nothing but a condom on (figured we're about to get around to it), buckle up and wait for her to do the same before speeding off. I drove fast and recklessly, my brain bathed in what felt like ecstasy. We end up in a school parking lot. Noticing a trend, I speak
Me: "It looks like we have a theme tonight."
Her: "Back to school?"
Me: "Great minds think alike..."
We hop back into the back, the heat still on, the radio still loud.
About an hour later, we find ourselves exhausted again. Resting the same way we were before. A song comes on we both know by heart (It was Foo fighters) and we sing in what seemed like perfect harmony while holding eye contact.
The songs get cut off by some county music and we both express disappointment in the radio man's choice of music (Nothing against that if that's what you like), look at each other, then go again, this time I take the top and her eyes roll back as if her mind just went elsewhere. (I gave her some lip service
)After that I beg for her to let me give more. She says no at first, but I keep asking and finally she says yes. I try and penetrate but she was tight and I couldn't seem to maneuver well enough to make entry and we try for a while but end up giving up on that. (Fuck-up numero dos)
I later figured out the entry bit another day
The next thing I remember is we're cuddling again, now overheated. Making plans to meet again, and to my own surprise I bring up the relationship talk. (Fuck-up numero three
shut-up, I don't know Spanish) "You want a relationship?" She asks looking up at me with her brown eyes.
Me: "Yeah, don't you?"
Her: "Yeah!"
Me: "Awesome..."
I roll over too heated to continue. She looks at the time, 8:49pm.
Her: "I gotta go, my parents are gonna kill me."
Me: "One more.."
Her: "Alright"
Her head goes down for a few moments and for once, I kick back.
About thirty seconds later, she comes back up "Alright let's go"
Me: "Wha- I didn't-"
Her: "I did, c'mon."
Me: "Jus-"
Her: "I will bite you..."
Me: "I believe you..."
She throws my black boxers at me "Tidey whities" as she calls them and clothes herself again.
Me: "No bra?"
Her: "Nah"
Me: "Right, those torture devices."
Her: "Exactly!"
I smell condom on her breath and make her aware of this.
Her: "Are you saying I have bad breath!?"
Me: "No, I'm just saying your parents might question you on it."
Her: "You have any mints?"
Me: "No, I have gum." I struggle to get it and give up "Just take mine"
Her: "Alright"
We share one more kiss with a gift before I suggest:
"Wanna drive with the top down?" I ask her, knowing she always wanted a convertible for the same reasons as me, even said it the same way I did when asked.
Her: "People are gonna think we're crazy but yeah."
Me: "Fuck them... not really, although you could fuck me again."
She laughs and says "Drive!"
Me: "Eye eye, capt'n!"
I put the top down and pull out of the parking lot.
As I pull out I look over at the building and shout to no one "HEY JANITORS, GET YOUR EYE'S CHECKED!" Then speed off as she set the gps to the right location and puts it back. I look over at her living her dream with the wind blowing through her hair as it is mine. Looks like freedom.
Me: "Where do you wanna go?"
Her: "You know I have to.."
Me: "No you don't. We could run away together!"
Her: "That's sweet, but I really do."
Me: "Oh, alright. Just sayin' ,the world is our oyster."
She says nothing just watching me drive and I look over at her. Wind still blowing through her hair, a look in her eye that makes my heart jump like it's our last night alive. Would've been the best way to go. It was yet another movie moment, I'll never forget that look.
Eventually when we get back I tell her she's got an excuse to have messed up hair now and mess it up even more with my hand before parking. I get a kiss on the cheek but nothing more, her sister is laughing heavily in her soccer mom mobile. I tell her to take my jacket and give it back when we see each other again since I can tell she's freezing now. She say's I'll need it more. I insist but so does she. I let her out of the car and watch as she waves goodbye while her sister takes her away.
With a smile on my face, I put the top back up and plug my phone into the charger before driving off to a gas station to relieve myself and pick up some breath mints. Still have some of those fuckers in the car!
I get home and don't even bother to take off my jacket before laying down. Her scent covers me like she's still there. My neck is soar with her mark. My brain is swimming in too deep. I get a text from her "Hey, thanks for tonight"
Me: "My honor and privilege"
Her: "How's your neck feeling?"
I take a picture and send her it "Left a mark"
Her: "I'll have to make it darker next time"
Me: "So there will be a next time...
"Her: "Maybe... I've already said too much
"We talk a little longer and wish each other goodnight.
From that night on, things died off more so every night and I became paranoid like a wild animal in a cage. Eventually it was the night before we were to meet again and watch a movie at my place, I texted her to video chat about where to pick her up and she said she needed to shower first. An hour went by, then two. Eventually I couldn't push the paranoia away anymore, I put down my pencil and paper and checked my media. It said she had blocked me, our conversation was deleted on the site of which we met. I shot her a message on Skype, she saw it but with no reply.
I sent one message asking to her not to end it like this. To at least text. A few minutes later, I got a hold of myself to accept what I had predicted in the car that night. It feels like a curse I thought she may have been able to break but we don't live in Hollywood romances. It's two in the morning when I feel the need to say goodbye on my own terms, knowing she'd almost surely never read it.
I left a three paragraph long message basically just saying goodbye. (yes, I'm wincing at this too
next time I'll just use one word, if any)I went through the usual steps of getting through heartbreak. Focusing on literally anything else, getting rid of any reminders of her, and eventually talking to another girl (like two or three days later).
I also found myself talking a little more playful like I did when I was around her which I almost never did prior (at least not as well or as much). Almost like she took a piece of my sole and left me with a bit of hers...
I always wonder how the next will show up the most recent. I have doubts in the back of my head, but I know for a fact it's going to happen. It's just a matter of when. Either way, it's just nice to finally get this one done. I know this was a really long post (not sure if most reports are like that since I don't write many) let me know what I could've left out, what you want more of. Some lessons I might have missed (if any). Whatever, I probably won't bite your head off
Anyway, if you take nothing else from this, take this at least:
Don't just throw yourself right into a relationship like I did. We are wild animals, we're not meant to be tamed so easily. It's just not natural.
