- Joined
- Jan 28, 2014
- Messages
- 367
Id like to talk about the factor of rewards and punishments to ourselves relating back to the state that was re written by ricardus from chases original post in https://www.girlschase.com/content/how-p ... tor-part-i
This is a hot ropic for me and I figured a lot of other guys who are beginning, might have this problem too. It makes sense when described but id like to go deeper. In the article it describes perfectly to imagine good things about good foods, and ive done a lot of research on myself going from 400 pounds down to 200 pounds and building muscle right now. So let me begin with each section and interlink everything together.
Working out
I hated working out with a passion, I thought it pushed me too much to the limit, I was intimidated by everyone around me, and on top of that I wanted out of the gym as fast as possible. Basically I was setting up the gym as punishment in my head. To fix this, you have to remember what is preached on here constantly. NEVER BASE YOUR SKILL LEVEL ON WHERE THW PROS ARE, BUT RATHER WHERW THWY WERE AT WHEN THEY WERE AT YOUR SKILL LEVEL. everyone at some point was struggling and thin with no muscle. So one must do what is preached in the success factor, start thinking of rewards, e.g. like the articles setting.goals, and how to lose weight for men describe, imagine yourself looking like that right now.
How do you look right now whether it is a six pack or being incredibly muscular. What is your preference, describe yourself in detail and working out.
How do girls perceive this, imagine beautiful woman telling you that your body is amazing. Imagine the smile on your face and the ego boost from this.
Doing things like this will increase the good feelings within.yourself. this especially works.for.me while im working out. Dont take your time during.workouts or focus on the pain.and the tediousness of the workout. Focus on the good feelings, from meditation learn to.focus on.your breathing and at the gym, you will start yo imagine how you look and the reactions.you will get from.woman eventually.being able to drown.out.the pain. Thus associating the pain.with good feelings causing you to want to work out, giving.you that boost of energy.
Diet
The same goes with diet. If you associate yourself with getting rid of a reward, your body will cause the extinction to kick in and you throw temper tantrums like a little kid does because your brain is seeking gratitude, and it isnt getting it. Look at an alcoholic going without alcohol cold turkey, a smoker, or a drug addict how long do they last without that. So if you love pizza and then cut it out of your life, you might last a few days and then go.ape shit and end up.binge eating. Say you get your craving for pizza, well they have a great recipe online for cauliflower pizza. Let me tell you when you get it right you really cant tell the difference. Imagine this.
Mmm pizza hut stuff crust pizza, cheese oozing off the sides, the taste of cheese and sauce in your mouth, melting as you slowly chew each and every bite. Sounds good doesnt it. But how about this
Cauliflower pizza, cooked in olive oil, tomato sauce with cheese melted perfectly on top. The taste of the olive oil FRESH cut peppers and FRESH cut mushrooms melting in your mouth. They both sound differently but however to me the taste of the fresh ingredients sounds better. If you eat healthy then have a pizza hut pizza you feel slow and drained and sick for a couple days after eating it so rather we would change it up like this.
I could orser the pizza hut pizza, but the greasy feeling.on my face followed with the acne, feeling slow, and gassy from all those bad carbs and processed foods.... or I could go to the store and get some cauliflower, spend the time to make the food, tasting the fresh cheese, olive oil, and fresh peppers sauted mushrooms melting in my mouth. If we do it right and set up the right reward and descriptions we will take the harder route. Think about it how.much time are we willing to set aside to.go.meet a woman.at a coffee shop for the mere thought of sexual.intercourse with her, we imagine it while being with her. That one girl in a bikini, her tight fit.body on top of you the feeling.of her sides as you feel your up and down the softness of her breasts all while she screams your name.... which leads to dating
Dating woman and abundance
This is the hardest one for me to go.over because I had to learn the hardway and lost a great girl while learning this lesson.
Ir was easy to call her up, especially when I had failed at picking up, like a spoiled kid I would have a tantrum if I couldnt pick up or get a number that night not caring about my mistakes. When she was too busy I would get angry about it, and I figured I would just ignore these feelings. What I was essentially doing was not being able to receive my reward that night from her and throwing a tantrum. The extinction factor kicked in, like eliminating pizza from your diet and not having a back up reward from it. Essentially, instead of putting my time and effort into myself and being lazy about things, I would try to elicit these feelings by trying to help other people. Like told in article after article, you attract the people who are most like you. So.if yiur life is a mess generally you find.people who are just like that and you really need to.look.in the mirror.work.on yourself. For example I was seeking validation from woman, not at first but after a while of being with them I wanted to.be validatrd and well.I lost someone I cared about, however it taught me what im talking about today and I.look backx this wasnt the first time I was doing it. By setting up.different rewards and focusing on yourself instead of say, making her your.mission in life you can eliminate seeking validation from a significant other, not being able to live with yourself and throwing a tantrum.because of the extinction paradigm that if she leaves im alone with my own thiughts and my shitty life you can say, that sounds awesome.I.want to try that. You no.longer start to seek validation by bragging and having her say, you are really awesome for doing that keep up the good work. Instead you change your internal reward system and yiu just know how awesome and.mich value you really have. You then gain the avility to provide value and cause her to be looking for validation and you pump her up. Like hey thats awesome go for your dreams imagine how you will feel when you acheive that goal. This also helps to have her talking all the time. Set up the reward that if you.listen to her and pump her up.for her dreams the thiughts that she will have greater sex with you, and hit.you up to hang out because she needs to be validated again. Not the opposite away around because essentially you start to chase her for sex, you ask her was that good for you how did I do? You already know that what you are doing is awespme by paying attention to how she reacts to the way you touch her.
Wrapping up, I read the advice about being confident and like described in the success factor, it never really told you how to do it. How not to seek validation until that article was written and with experience from my part along with it. You will be able to stop seeking validation, stop chasing woman, and live the life you want where woman hit you up constantly, or try to.make.you jealous.to get you back.in their.lives.
This is a hot ropic for me and I figured a lot of other guys who are beginning, might have this problem too. It makes sense when described but id like to go deeper. In the article it describes perfectly to imagine good things about good foods, and ive done a lot of research on myself going from 400 pounds down to 200 pounds and building muscle right now. So let me begin with each section and interlink everything together.
Working out
I hated working out with a passion, I thought it pushed me too much to the limit, I was intimidated by everyone around me, and on top of that I wanted out of the gym as fast as possible. Basically I was setting up the gym as punishment in my head. To fix this, you have to remember what is preached on here constantly. NEVER BASE YOUR SKILL LEVEL ON WHERE THW PROS ARE, BUT RATHER WHERW THWY WERE AT WHEN THEY WERE AT YOUR SKILL LEVEL. everyone at some point was struggling and thin with no muscle. So one must do what is preached in the success factor, start thinking of rewards, e.g. like the articles setting.goals, and how to lose weight for men describe, imagine yourself looking like that right now.
How do you look right now whether it is a six pack or being incredibly muscular. What is your preference, describe yourself in detail and working out.
How do girls perceive this, imagine beautiful woman telling you that your body is amazing. Imagine the smile on your face and the ego boost from this.
Doing things like this will increase the good feelings within.yourself. this especially works.for.me while im working out. Dont take your time during.workouts or focus on the pain.and the tediousness of the workout. Focus on the good feelings, from meditation learn to.focus on.your breathing and at the gym, you will start yo imagine how you look and the reactions.you will get from.woman eventually.being able to drown.out.the pain. Thus associating the pain.with good feelings causing you to want to work out, giving.you that boost of energy.
Diet
The same goes with diet. If you associate yourself with getting rid of a reward, your body will cause the extinction to kick in and you throw temper tantrums like a little kid does because your brain is seeking gratitude, and it isnt getting it. Look at an alcoholic going without alcohol cold turkey, a smoker, or a drug addict how long do they last without that. So if you love pizza and then cut it out of your life, you might last a few days and then go.ape shit and end up.binge eating. Say you get your craving for pizza, well they have a great recipe online for cauliflower pizza. Let me tell you when you get it right you really cant tell the difference. Imagine this.
Mmm pizza hut stuff crust pizza, cheese oozing off the sides, the taste of cheese and sauce in your mouth, melting as you slowly chew each and every bite. Sounds good doesnt it. But how about this
Cauliflower pizza, cooked in olive oil, tomato sauce with cheese melted perfectly on top. The taste of the olive oil FRESH cut peppers and FRESH cut mushrooms melting in your mouth. They both sound differently but however to me the taste of the fresh ingredients sounds better. If you eat healthy then have a pizza hut pizza you feel slow and drained and sick for a couple days after eating it so rather we would change it up like this.
I could orser the pizza hut pizza, but the greasy feeling.on my face followed with the acne, feeling slow, and gassy from all those bad carbs and processed foods.... or I could go to the store and get some cauliflower, spend the time to make the food, tasting the fresh cheese, olive oil, and fresh peppers sauted mushrooms melting in my mouth. If we do it right and set up the right reward and descriptions we will take the harder route. Think about it how.much time are we willing to set aside to.go.meet a woman.at a coffee shop for the mere thought of sexual.intercourse with her, we imagine it while being with her. That one girl in a bikini, her tight fit.body on top of you the feeling.of her sides as you feel your up and down the softness of her breasts all while she screams your name.... which leads to dating
Dating woman and abundance
This is the hardest one for me to go.over because I had to learn the hardway and lost a great girl while learning this lesson.
Ir was easy to call her up, especially when I had failed at picking up, like a spoiled kid I would have a tantrum if I couldnt pick up or get a number that night not caring about my mistakes. When she was too busy I would get angry about it, and I figured I would just ignore these feelings. What I was essentially doing was not being able to receive my reward that night from her and throwing a tantrum. The extinction factor kicked in, like eliminating pizza from your diet and not having a back up reward from it. Essentially, instead of putting my time and effort into myself and being lazy about things, I would try to elicit these feelings by trying to help other people. Like told in article after article, you attract the people who are most like you. So.if yiur life is a mess generally you find.people who are just like that and you really need to.look.in the mirror.work.on yourself. For example I was seeking validation from woman, not at first but after a while of being with them I wanted to.be validatrd and well.I lost someone I cared about, however it taught me what im talking about today and I.look backx this wasnt the first time I was doing it. By setting up.different rewards and focusing on yourself instead of say, making her your.mission in life you can eliminate seeking validation from a significant other, not being able to live with yourself and throwing a tantrum.because of the extinction paradigm that if she leaves im alone with my own thiughts and my shitty life you can say, that sounds awesome.I.want to try that. You no.longer start to seek validation by bragging and having her say, you are really awesome for doing that keep up the good work. Instead you change your internal reward system and yiu just know how awesome and.mich value you really have. You then gain the avility to provide value and cause her to be looking for validation and you pump her up. Like hey thats awesome go for your dreams imagine how you will feel when you acheive that goal. This also helps to have her talking all the time. Set up the reward that if you.listen to her and pump her up.for her dreams the thiughts that she will have greater sex with you, and hit.you up to hang out because she needs to be validated again. Not the opposite away around because essentially you start to chase her for sex, you ask her was that good for you how did I do? You already know that what you are doing is awespme by paying attention to how she reacts to the way you touch her.
Wrapping up, I read the advice about being confident and like described in the success factor, it never really told you how to do it. How not to seek validation until that article was written and with experience from my part along with it. You will be able to stop seeking validation, stop chasing woman, and live the life you want where woman hit you up constantly, or try to.make.you jealous.to get you back.in their.lives.
