- Joined
- Jul 4, 2015
- Messages
- 40
So i was looking to turn a lay into a fb/fwb type relationship but failed to do so. I might type the LR up in the field report section soon but for the time being here is the long and short of it:
The Lay
On holiday, I was approaching women left, right and centre at a club, I had social momentum and preselection on my side. The girl who i slept with was the single friend of a girl i was gaming, she introduced me because she had a bf. The lay was fairly easy not much connection building just escalated and ended up banging her on the beach. However we got interrupted and once i came i couldn't get it up again so just had to finger her for a bit afterwards. An average performance at best. Anyway on the way back to the hostel I was warm and friendly, she took my number and i bid her goodnight. Definitely in the Lover category here!
Back at home - first date
She text me the same night saying she wished we had got pizza. But anyway when i was back home i decided to start texting her to see if i can could get a FB established. Her texts were longer than mine and she was always quicker to respond. I mostly just text to set up logistics (Like you always should!). We met up and went for a couple of drinks at a bar. I deep dived a bit and built some connection, she was a cool girl but i never really felt a spark. Besides being a good opportunity to practice some chase frames i made sure that she was always investing in me more, she was leaning off the edge of her seat whilst most of the time i was sat back in mine. All good!
So as part of creating a FB i decided to start setting some expectations, by telling her that i intend to go travelling and work abroad in one years time. She definitely picked up on this and repeated the fact later in the night. I thought this was a good initial frame to lay because even though I'm going abroad its a long time away and shouldn't scare her off.
Later on in the date i pushed her up against the wall and we kissed [Note: if you want a guranteed 100% chance to pull a girl push them up against a wall, works every time
]. We ended up holding hands and walking down the road, i quickly put a stop to this as i didn't want to be give her the wrong idea. At the second bar we chatted some more she was leaning into me a lot and we were kissing a lot. On the way home i decided not to push for the close because we both had work the next day, although i new i could probably have banged her if i wanted, but i figured we might as well get to know each other seeing as we barely did that when we first met.
On the way back home i cheekily text her saying i was already home as i leaved nearer to the bars then she did and she hinted that i should come take a journey south of the river sometime. I teased her again asking if she was inviting me to hers and she said "If you play your cards right" so i new i was in there. I was going to go round hers on the Sunday but it fell through so she immediately asked if i was free the next day. I took the initiative and invited her over saying I'd cook her dinner at mine. No point beating around the bush i new it was in the bag and needed some better logistics this time.
Second date
The second date at my house went exactly how i wanted a Fwb "Date" to go. She came in, i showed her round and whilst the food was cooking we had sex. It was decent but not amazing because i had to wear a condom because she's not on the pill. Anyway we went for about 20 mins then finished and had dinner I'd cooked. There was no pillow talk or cuddling or kissing afterwards just straight in the shower than dinner. Over dinner we chatted with her doing most of the talking about her house mates and her day to day life. I listened, relatively intently but my mind wondered a bit at the end. She mentioned the fact i was going travelling in a year again. I think she definitely clocked i wanted a casual relationship. After a while i hinted that she should leave because me and my housemate were going to watch a TV program. She left graciously and i gave her a kiss goodbye and thanked her for coming round. She thanked me for dinner. The whole date lasted 3 hours and went more or less how i wanted it to.
After the date i left it 3 days and text her saying i hope she enjoyed the meal, asked how she was and mentioned that she should invite me round sometime (i was hoping she would cook for me). However she never responded. I still might do one last do or die text to see if she is keen...
Closing thoughts
I know this girl was probably looking for a bf but i thought she would still be interested in the relationship i was offering in the mean time. Is there anything i could have done to keep this going? I like her but not enough for a gf, i appreciate spending some time with her and would have liked having sex once a week or so. One thing i could have done is text her straight after the second date to thank her for coming round to reinforce that i enjoyed my time with her. Other than that what can you do, short of being dishonest, to get a girl to commit to a FwB type relationship? This girl was 25 years old so i didnt think she'd be sooo desperate for a bf and nothing else. Maybe i was wrong
All pointers welcome!
Cheers,
HipHop
The Lay
On holiday, I was approaching women left, right and centre at a club, I had social momentum and preselection on my side. The girl who i slept with was the single friend of a girl i was gaming, she introduced me because she had a bf. The lay was fairly easy not much connection building just escalated and ended up banging her on the beach. However we got interrupted and once i came i couldn't get it up again so just had to finger her for a bit afterwards. An average performance at best. Anyway on the way back to the hostel I was warm and friendly, she took my number and i bid her goodnight. Definitely in the Lover category here!
Back at home - first date
She text me the same night saying she wished we had got pizza. But anyway when i was back home i decided to start texting her to see if i can could get a FB established. Her texts were longer than mine and she was always quicker to respond. I mostly just text to set up logistics (Like you always should!). We met up and went for a couple of drinks at a bar. I deep dived a bit and built some connection, she was a cool girl but i never really felt a spark. Besides being a good opportunity to practice some chase frames i made sure that she was always investing in me more, she was leaning off the edge of her seat whilst most of the time i was sat back in mine. All good!
So as part of creating a FB i decided to start setting some expectations, by telling her that i intend to go travelling and work abroad in one years time. She definitely picked up on this and repeated the fact later in the night. I thought this was a good initial frame to lay because even though I'm going abroad its a long time away and shouldn't scare her off.
Later on in the date i pushed her up against the wall and we kissed [Note: if you want a guranteed 100% chance to pull a girl push them up against a wall, works every time
]. We ended up holding hands and walking down the road, i quickly put a stop to this as i didn't want to be give her the wrong idea. At the second bar we chatted some more she was leaning into me a lot and we were kissing a lot. On the way home i decided not to push for the close because we both had work the next day, although i new i could probably have banged her if i wanted, but i figured we might as well get to know each other seeing as we barely did that when we first met.On the way back home i cheekily text her saying i was already home as i leaved nearer to the bars then she did and she hinted that i should come take a journey south of the river sometime. I teased her again asking if she was inviting me to hers and she said "If you play your cards right
" so i new i was in there. I was going to go round hers on the Sunday but it fell through so she immediately asked if i was free the next day. I took the initiative and invited her over saying I'd cook her dinner at mine. No point beating around the bush i new it was in the bag and needed some better logistics this time.Second date
The second date at my house went exactly how i wanted a Fwb "Date" to go. She came in, i showed her round and whilst the food was cooking we had sex. It was decent but not amazing because i had to wear a condom because she's not on the pill. Anyway we went for about 20 mins then finished and had dinner I'd cooked. There was no pillow talk or cuddling or kissing afterwards just straight in the shower than dinner. Over dinner we chatted with her doing most of the talking about her house mates and her day to day life. I listened, relatively intently but my mind wondered a bit at the end. She mentioned the fact i was going travelling in a year again. I think she definitely clocked i wanted a casual relationship. After a while i hinted that she should leave because me and my housemate were going to watch a TV program. She left graciously and i gave her a kiss goodbye and thanked her for coming round. She thanked me for dinner. The whole date lasted 3 hours and went more or less how i wanted it to.
After the date i left it 3 days and text her saying i hope she enjoyed the meal, asked how she was and mentioned that she should invite me round sometime (i was hoping she would cook for me). However she never responded. I still might do one last do or die text to see if she is keen...
Closing thoughts
I know this girl was probably looking for a bf but i thought she would still be interested in the relationship i was offering in the mean time. Is there anything i could have done to keep this going? I like her but not enough for a gf, i appreciate spending some time with her and would have liked having sex once a week or so. One thing i could have done is text her straight after the second date to thank her for coming round to reinforce that i enjoyed my time with her. Other than that what can you do, short of being dishonest, to get a girl to commit to a FwB type relationship? This girl was 25 years old so i didnt think she'd be sooo desperate for a bf and nothing else. Maybe i was wrong
All pointers welcome!
Cheers,
HipHop
