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First date at my place, what's the escalation process?

Clarity

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Jul 30, 2013
Messages
18
Recently a girl entered my social circle last week, but I thought she was attractive and made sure not to be slotted as a friend, and have barely talked to her besides introductions and some flirty banter.

She has initiated very brief texting conversations (2-4 texts) with me asking about how my night was and saying our social circle missed me when I wasn't there one night, and I took that as a sign of interest and asked her to hang out at my place for an "easy date" as chase calls it (the date that is just at your place).

She accepted. Most of the articles here talk about how to escalate assuming you pulled a girl to your place from some other event at a club or a bar (and therefore you have already been connecting with them), but she will just be coming to my place right off the bat and we haven't really gotten to know each other that well yet.

I'm assuming it's on though...girls don't just come over to your place as friends like this to my knowledge especially if we really don't know each other that well, right? What should be my process here? get past small talk/deep dive/connect and then escalate, or just escalate right away?

I suppose my concern is that the escalation window will close if I don't make a move, but it won't have been open in the first place if I don't get her comfortable enough with me first.

Many thanks in advance,
Clarity
 

Verisimilitude

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Dec 20, 2012
Messages
461
Dinner, drinks, movie (or TV), escalation, sex. Its really that simple. Use the dinner and drinks to deep dive and connect, the movie to get her close to you and escalate, and the couch or your bed for sex. If you're concerned about communicating interest, throw in a couple sexual frames. She'll get the picture ;)

Don't be nervous about this. If this girl is coming over to your place to see just you after a only a few flirty conversations, she's thought about the two of you together and is ok with it. You might get put into the boyfriend category, but with a little work, you can avoid that too.
 

NarrowJ

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Feb 13, 2013
Messages
1,275
Hey Clarity,

You should definitely be trying to escalate to sex, but don't do it *too* fast since you guys don't really know each other hardly yet. If you guys hang out for a couple hours, and you're increasing touch little by little, she should be plenty ready to kiss/make out/even sex by that time.

Give this thread a read, to see a successful lay I had with a girl that I was in the same situation with as you are now (only having a brief conversation, and her coming over to hang out as a first date).


Hope it helps, and let us know how the date goes!
NJ
 

Clarity

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Jul 30, 2013
Messages
18
Thank you so much for the quick and helpful replies! I will definitely let you guys know how it goes, thank you both for breaking it down for me :)
 

Clarity

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Jul 30, 2013
Messages
18
Success ;)
Some problems to note, we started the movie too early w/o enough conversation and connection and so it took awhile for her to get comfortable in my bed. At many points she actually rejected some of my kino which made me very worried/doubtful/nervous but I kept telling myself that she was still there...she hadn't left....I made sure to listen to her general actions rather than specific ones. Eventually it all worked out, thanks for the advice guys.
 

Verisimilitude

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Dec 20, 2012
Messages
461
Hey congrats man! Be sure to post a FR for us if you want the extra critique.

we started the movie too early w/o enough conversation and connection and so it took awhile for her to get comfortable in my bed. At many points she actually rejected some of my kino which made me very worried/doubtful/nervous but I kept telling myself that she was still there...she hadn't left

Remember when we told you how she definitely wanted it, but was going to be hesitant because she didn't know you 100% yet? Seems like that was the case.

Anyways, congrats man, and I'm glad things worked out!
 
the right date makes getting her back home a piece of cake

NarrowJ

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Feb 13, 2013
Messages
1,275
Great job, man! You should put a field report up for the other members.

Very cool :)
NJ
 
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