- Joined
- Feb 5, 2017
- Messages
- 901
Prelude
I met this girl via stationary daygame, true indirect game. She’s reading a book, and I sit next to her. I actually sit there for a while waiting for the right opportunity. At some point, I finally open, asking her what she’s reading. We talk for a bit about that, and I lace in some good SOTs, add some qualifications as her interest broadens, as well as a mild date seeding plus some teasing. I can tell while talking to her that she’s much older than me. I get her number, and it feels pretty solid.
I find out later that she had noticed me sit next to her, and that I intrigued her on the open.
Texting is smooth. I keep it light and fun. I get lucky and I’m able to dodge an age related question from her due to a joke I’m able to make. So the date is set, and I meet her.
Preparation
In order to prepare, I do a whole lot of internal mentality stuff. I meditate, doing affirmations that utilize swinggcat's frame based vibes. I listen to Major Mark self-hypnosis. I rewatch an old coaching video with teevs. I read up on older women. I meditate again. The most important piece is reading old LRs from me at my best.
Beginnings
We meet at my usual spot. She’s actually there a bit early, and is reading a book. She's dressed in a warm looking, oversized sweater. She's got huge tits for sure under there. I come over, give her a hug, and lean over. She’s started a tab, and she puts my drink on her tab. While we wait for my drink to come, I keep my body language open and calm, but at the same time she tells me that I have a very intense energy to me. I ask her if that’s a good thing, and she says it’s neutral, just an observation. This statement becomes a bit of an inside joke throughout the night, and we have many inside jokes.
Once I get my drink, we head to the back to find some nice seats. I extend my arms for her to link with me. I like this more than I like grabbing her hand, especially at the start because it requires active investment from her to link arms, but at the same time, is such a low effort thing, that it almost never gets denied. But all of a sudden, you have something that’s akin to a hand hold, without any of the pressure of a hand hold. I love it.
We sit down, and we start going into a lot of different conversational threads. She actually calls me out for dodging a variety of her questions. She finally ends up asking me my age directly, so I tell her. It turns out she’s about 9 years older than me. I tell her it doesn’t really matter, as the vibe is what matters. I also briefly mention that I used to see an older girl and we had a really fun time together. I keep the nature of our relationship ambiguous because I don’t want to boyfriend zone myself.
From here, I bring up the sex is unfair gambit while talking about discretion. I use my culture and upbringing to connect to hers, and link that with female sexual repression. She buys into this, and talks about hook ups and stuff in that realm as well. She implies she has a sexual side to her, and I use that to calibrate later on.
I make sure to focus on keeping it fun. I’m a funny person, and I’m good at teasing when I prevent myself from getting carried away being a flying monkey. So she’s laughing, and I’m fractionating really well between sexual topics and funny topics, and more emotionally interesting topics. I also try to avoid talking about our ages. Along the way she asks me about what I do, and I avoid the question for now. I realize I haven’t seeded a pull, so I make sure to weave some seeds for a pull as well.
After about an hour, I suggest a pull. She denies coming home, because she says she knows where that leads, and that the pace is too fast and she knows that’s not for her anymore. I say it’s good to know what you want, so long as you can keep yourself open to new experiences. I don’t honestly remember how I dealt with a lot of the frames she tried to force, so the only real thing I can say is that I held my frame throughout. I focused and made sure that the frame of being spontaneous, having adventures, and exploring connections with people was good, and that being able to explore sexually with people you feel you trust, and who you know won’t judge you, is vital to good experiences like that.
Non-reactivity
After she denies the pull, I suggest we go grab some sweet food instead. She’s down, and we walk over. On her own, she links arms with me while we walk. At some point, I switch it to a hand hold. While walking, I tell her I was thinking about her point that the pace being too fast is not good, and while I understood her perspective, I didn’t actually agree with it. I talked how passion and spontaneity can be wonderful things. She says that she’s come to the point that if something is going to happen, she’s willing to wait for it. I pace and lead using a LMR gambit that teevs had talked with me about. Basically, I tell her that of course I wouldn’t want to have sex with someone who wasn’t looking, or felt uncomfortable. I told her that I’d been with girls when I was younger, where they gave LMR, and that moving through it always led to bad, shitty sex. What’s more enjoyable is when you’re with someone, and they fully want everything that is about to happen.
At the dessert spot, I buy the dessert, and I actually kiss her while we’re in line. It felt like the right thing to do. I give a more in depth makeout as well, but then I pull back. I suggest we go to another bar nearby that has good live music.
We go, and it’s very loud. Nice because it gives an opportunity to talk closely in each other’s ear. I can literally feel her triangle gazing me every half second, and try hard not to call her out on it, but I’m laughing a lot in my eyes and she can tell, though she’s not sure why. At this point, we get to the serious frame battle. She asks me what type of relationship person I am, monogamy or nonmonogamy. Before answering, I actually have her say her perspective first. She tells me she’s fully monogamous. She knows that’s what she wants, and she doesn’t want to do hook ups. She also thinks non-monogamy just doesn’t work, because of the complexity. I counter by first explaining that I used to see a girl in a non-monogamous capacity, and that I feel that it’s a wonderful thing, because not everyone can provide the role people want for everything. The connection you and I have is different than the connection you have with someone else, which is different than the connection I have with someone else. And that doesn’t forestall us being able to explore in a way that lets you grow. I tell her I think sex is a wonderful, beautiful thing, and that while it’s intimate obviously, it adds a wonderful connection between two people that is a net positive. At this point, she has a very clear vibe that she thinks this date is going to end soon because we’re not looking for the same thing. At the same time, I’m keeping an extremely warm vibe, and still fractionating out between this discussion, and other more fun things. Somewhere along the way, I introduce the 8 kinds of orgasms routine in a kind of non-smooth manner. She actually calls me out on it, asking if I've really catalogued it, and that it almost sounds a bit like a sales pitch. I tell her that I used to date a girl who was non-monogamous, and that girl was the one who actually taught me about it. I only really talk about a mental orgasm at this point.
After I pay for my drink, and it seems like we’re ready to go, I turn to my girl and tell her, “I’m really enjoying talking to you, and I’d like to continue-what do you think we should do?” I use the indirect pull strategy more as a compliance test to see where she's at, and how she's feeling. She tells me she was actually thinking of heading home, since it’s past her bed time. I tease her a bit, and tell her that let’s go to a nearby rooftop for just a bit longer, we’ll have a good time, and keep talking. She tentatively agrees, and we get going. If I had tried to pull at this point, the entire thing would have crashed and burned.
Frames Melting (Persistence)
We go to the other venue, which is my regular spot. It’s been raining, so I know the roof will be empty, so even though the main place is loud, we can go onto the roof where it’s quieter. I’m freezing, so I have her hug me to keep me warm. She’s already leaning onto me quite a bit, so it’s not much extra to get her to hug me to keep me warm. We talk some more. At this point I list the second of 8 types of orgasms, the breast orgasm. Throughout all of my gambits, she’s actually calling me out as using tactics to prize myself. I just nonchalantly blow it off, and say that I find it fascinating, and link it to true past experiences that I’ve had.
She asks me whether I purposefully sat next to her in order to talk to her. I said I had come to the park to listen to an audio book, but that I had sat next to her on purpose. I do say that I sat next to her because I was curious about the book she was reading, and that finding out she was a cool person was more of a pleasant surprise. She says that she doesn't completely believe me, but that she will choose to. At this point, I’m getting real cold, so I suggest we go sit inside for a bit.
We go, and we talk some more, and she’s still touchy with me, and I’m maintaining my strong confident vibe. She starts trying to shit test me by calling me cocky, which I just laugh off. I ask her if she’s ever been to another bar nearby, and that we should go there because it’s quieter, and more comfy. She actually asks me if I really want to still keep talking with her. I tell her I’m having a good time, and we should go. She agrees and we head over.
On the elevator down, she leans over to kiss me, and I deny her. I just get close to her face and don’t kiss her. She tells me she’s just leaving the option open, and I tell her I like to tease a person, and that sometimes letting the anticipation build and build is a much more pleasurable sensation.
I actually think this specific action caused a whole change in vibe, and made her much more open to the pull. I feel like her train of though must have been something like "he's clearly not the right kind of person to date" -> "he's fun, and it's nice to talk" -> "we've kissed, and I'm attracted to him" -> "he's asked me home and I've said no, but he's still being super chill about it?" -> "he's not kissing me? Is he being honest about his sex positivity?" -> "ok maybe going home will be safe and I don't have to have sex if I don't want to".
Her Buy In
At the next spot, the sex talk really ramps up, and we start trading sex stories. Specifically she tells me a lot of sex stories, and she actually starts trying to sexually prize herself to me. She also makes some innuendos that clearly imply that she’s now comfortable coming home with me. I don’t seize on that immediately, as I don’t want to be too reactive, but I know the moment is right. I also start using some more explicit sexual humor that implies both of us are going to hook up. I keep it very absurd so it's clear it's a joke, while also getting her buy in on it, to make it clear what the vibe is going to be. So when she starts on another dirty story, I tell her that we should actually head out, and she should tell me the story while we walk to my apartment to distract me from the cold. And off we go.
LMR
At my place, I actually break the 10 minute rule a bit, and do all the various pull activities I had seeded. Specifically, having her try on my clothes-which incidentally gets her out of a sweater she had been wearing the entire night, playing good music, and making a drink. We don’t get too far into the drink before we start making out.
This is actually the first time I’ve succeeded against LMR. And even more incredibly, I had fun doing it, but that’s because I could tell she wanted it.
I started making out, and I made sure to be slow, confident, and incredibly sensual. I was licking her everywhere I could, which admittedly was just her face, neck, and chest. At the same time I was grinding on her hard. She stops me at various points and tells me that she’s certain we’re not having sex tonight. I tell her that that’s completely fine with me. If we spend the entire night making out, that’ll be fun, if we have sex we have sex, if we don’t, no big deal-I’m having fun being with her. And I sincerely mean it. It takes her some time to believe it though. I actually ask her-do you think I’m lying, and she says yes. I just shrug and say ok, with a smile. I just keep kissing, and grinding, and teasing. She’s squirming, moaning, and it’s very clear she’s sopping wet. In fact, she tells me she’s incredibly wet, and now, she tells me she really wants to have sex, but is telling herself that she shouldn’t. Every time she brings up resistance, I just keep telling her, it’s absolutely your choice, and each time, I mean it sincerely. She tells me she’s going to cum from the dry humping, and that’s some high school stuff, so I ask her what’s wrong with high school stuff, it’s all innocent and fun-and an orgasm is a fun thing. Plus it’s her choice to keep it at a high school rating, and I'm completely fine with that.
Happy Endings
Finally, she says fuck it, let’s have sex, you win. I stop her, and say I don’t want to win, I want you to want it. She says it’s the same thing, and she wants it. But now I have her complete buy in. At the same time, I’m not going to give it to her easily. I start teasing her on how she can claim to have more sexual prowess than me if she’s cumming from me dry humping her, and that I probably shouldn’t do anything because she can’t handle it. I just keep rinsing and repeating this, until I have her in my bed, naked, begging for my cock to fill her.
And I do. And it was wonderful sex.
After we do some pillowtalking, she starts heading home. As she’s leaving, I tell her that I had a fun time with her, and that it would be fun to see her again, but that I know I’m not the right fit for what she’s looking for. She looks at me, and says she’ll think about it, because she does want something really serious, but that she had a wonderful evening.
Smiles all around.
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