For the Experienced Guys: What is the right vibe?

[TomGray]

Hey, guys, yesterday was such a bad day on my approaches I don't even want to put it up. Eventually, I became addicted to the approach as the day went on but every one was off on my part. And I know it's how I came across.

So my question is this: what is the correct way to come across, the right "vibe", and how do you create and maintain this? Sometimes, I can access it and it feels awesome because I know that the next girl I talk to will respond warmly to me. But some days, like yesterday, no matter what I do, I can't radiate it.

I know all the requisites: manly, slow, commanding, but warm, sincere, and playful. How to put them all together?

 

[NarrowJ]

TG,

Sometimes, I can access it and it feels awesome because I know that the next girl I talk to will respond warmly to me.

Check out the thread I bumped over on the Tactics & Techniques forum. I'd link it, but I'm on my phone. The key, to me, is exactly what you wrote above. Always go into an interaction telling yourself that she wants to talk to you and you'll give off that vibe. In my mind, it's a circular power loop where you know you'll be successful, and therefore you exhibit an aura if confidence, which people notice and feel. Do the things Light suggests in the thread I was talking about. Stand up tall, put your chin up and your chest out, shoulders back, open yourself up and you'll just naturally feel more confident and willing to take risks. There's been research done to back it up. Holding a strong pose actually alters you chemically.

Anyway, that was something that really helped me be successful on a more consistent basis. Hope it helps!

NJ

 

[Richard]

Lights Article

Here TG, this is the post NJ was talking about.

I'd like to add a little extra that I learned from Light as well, he's helped me out so much via PM, And here's another thing he passed on to me.

Aside from the way you approach, you want a mindset to match. The best mindset to have is that of a "little kid," because they are curious about everything. Because of this, when you ask a question or make a statement, it doesn't sound like its imposing, it naturally sounds warm, and genuine curious thus, women are much more likely to reciprocate that warmth.

I approach with curiosity in my head and warmth in my heart, and if you've seen any of my FRs , you'll see that I use a lot of playfulness, and sexual frames with playfulness. Don't focus on bundling all those qualities into one approach, instead, approach like a big kid, and show the rest of those qualities through the conversation. If you transition between playfulness and seriousness during the conversation she'll know you're comfortable, and will reciprocate that ease.

-Richard