Friend zoning a Lover

[shaneawi]

On the second date I got this girl to my bedroom. I'm 27 and she's 19. We talked openly about sex and what she likes and what I like. She asked me about me about bdsm and how many partners I had and if I had any STDs. She told me about her partners and what she likes. and She sat on my lap and played with my hair. We kissed. She teased me and was on me in the cowgirl position with our clothes on dry humping. She played with my belt.

When I tried to escalate the whole night she resisted playfully. She slept in my bed overnight with clothes on and let me massage her areas but wouldn't have sex.

The next day she said she wanted to be friends and didn't want to have sex.

How did I go from lover to friend in one day? Was it because she thought I was too experienced for her?

 

[WayOfHand]

It was because you didn't fuck her. Thats what friends do. She needed you to make the lay happen in order to be sexual. She is supposed to resist and you are supposed to push through. You dont need her vocal "permission" for this. Make it happen by upping physicality.

 

[shaneawi]

I thought it was because I was 8 years older than her and I'm an attorney with a career and shes only 19. Throughout the night she mentioned how I would just move on and fine someone else.

 

[Inbocca]

When you say you tried to escalate the whole night while she resisted, do you have any examples? How hard were you persisting? I'm curious to know, but it sounds like WoH is right. Persistence is key, once you get over her "major wall" the rest of the resistance will be minimal.

I thought it was because I was 8 years older than her and I'm an attorney with a career and shes only 19. Throughout the night she mentioned how I would just move on and fine someone else.

Lots of young coeds get with older guys with careers. If she's worried about you moving on once you're done, combined with the resistance, it sounds like she didn't want to put out because she was trying to keep you as a boyfriend. Persistence here would have gotten you the farthest.

 

[Smurf]

Way of hand has a point.

Because you obviously wanted to fuck her (and she most likely wanted to fuck as well), but didn't make it happen she friend zoned you. Judging from the testing at the finish line it was most likely a comfort issue beforehand.

Jake.

 

[shaneawi]

What was weird about it was that she even said during that night that I wasn't in the friendzone. I was pretty sexual that night with her.

For example we kissed, but she turned her head. Sometimes she would kiss back and then she wouldnt sometimes. I tried to playfully dance with her but she playfully resisted. I tried to take her coat off but she playfully resisted. I tried to put my hand in her pants but she resisted. She kept pushing my hands away every time. But we would just cuddle together and she would massage my arm or leg or something like that.

She did climb on top of me cowgril while I had clothes on, she played with my belt, she took my jeans off, she tried to come up with or own handshake for the both of us. She also sat on my lap without me asking. When I tried to kiss her or remove clothing she grabbed my hands and wouldnt let me.

I'm a lawyer so I know the legal cases well and didn't want to push something too hard on the girl because of the accusations that you hear about all the time.


Am I permanently in the friendzone or should I try again with her? She texted me and said she didnt want to have sex and thought we should just be friends. I've never been friendzoned after a situation like that with a girl.