I seem to get this on occasion. If you're big into self development, (and you're trying news things with your life, etc), then sooner or later you'll probably end up hearing the opinions from people who you haven't seen you in years, and how shocked they are about it, in comparison to who you were before.
I think it's also more of a female thing - to not be able to curtail their emotions, and you hear the like of "Gee, I couldn't have pictured you doing that". The thing is, that there might be someone else present to hear it... someone who might have only known you for a few weeks! So it's sort of like raining on your parade, and I don't think they necessarily mean to. To the person who hasn't known you for too long, such a comment might translate to "he was a hermit before"
I don't mind hearing it once, but if I hear it repeated, (let's say a few moments later, at the end of the conversation), they might have the last word with something like "yeah... hmm, I'd never have thought that now!". It can be a bit much because you're suddenly smacked in the face with the opinion that that person has (which they'd jumped to) about you.
Part of me feels like saying "what do you mean that you couldn't have pictured it? What the fuck does that mean?". Last time it happened, I felt like saying "you know, the only reason you think that of me anyway, is because you don't understand people very well" and I genuinely had no idea was she meant by it anyway!
So what would be the ideal thing to say here, that shows that you've no idea what they mean by it? and re-frames thing to makes them question what they mean. Maybe something like "I don't need to hear your thought process out loud!" Ha, maybe I just answered it!
Thanks guys
I think it's also more of a female thing - to not be able to curtail their emotions, and you hear the like of "Gee, I couldn't have pictured you doing that". The thing is, that there might be someone else present to hear it... someone who might have only known you for a few weeks! So it's sort of like raining on your parade, and I don't think they necessarily mean to. To the person who hasn't known you for too long, such a comment might translate to "he was a hermit before"
I don't mind hearing it once, but if I hear it repeated, (let's say a few moments later, at the end of the conversation), they might have the last word with something like "yeah... hmm, I'd never have thought that now!". It can be a bit much because you're suddenly smacked in the face with the opinion that that person has (which they'd jumped to) about you.
Part of me feels like saying "what do you mean that you couldn't have pictured it? What the fuck does that mean?". Last time it happened, I felt like saying "you know, the only reason you think that of me anyway, is because you don't understand people very well" and I genuinely had no idea was she meant by it anyway!
So what would be the ideal thing to say here, that shows that you've no idea what they mean by it? and re-frames thing to makes them question what they mean. Maybe something like "I don't need to hear your thought process out loud!" Ha, maybe I just answered it!
Thanks guys
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