Girl gets back in contact...where did I mess up?

[killerman]

Ok so a girl I met a few weeks back on the street. We met then exchanged numbers. Sent the initial text to which she replied. Then I started rapport building texts but 1 or 2 texts in she stopped texting me. I sent her another text a week later to which she didn't reply. Then 2 weeks later (Tuesday last week) I get this text from her. Now all throughout last year, when I'd get a text from a girl who'd previously blown me off or stopped texting me before I could get her out on a date, I would mess things up by giving away too much information about myself too quick. I didn't create any mystery or intrigue for the girl so she'd vanish again. This time however I made sure I followed the advice in Chase's article "What to do when she gets back in contact". So she'd ask me questions but I'd totally ignore them. Worked great at first but after I ignored her questions 4 or 5 times I think that maybe she got a little pissed and maybe I came across as too gamey. Chase says you should ignore their questions but does that include ALL questions? Or maybe I asked the wrong question when trying to set up the date. To be honest I've never liked the "what's your schedule like" as you're not technically asking them when they're free, just what their schedule is for the week, which means they might just only tell you what they're doing that week, rather than telling you when they're free, hence what I got with this girl when I asked her what her schedule is. Definitely going back to asking them "what nights you free" instead of "what's your schedule like". However where exactly did I go wrong as I still don't know where I fucked up with this one. Here goes:

girl: Hi ****, hope you're ok x

me: hey **** how have you been? you been up to anything exciting recently?

girl: Yeah not too bad thanks! Working today but the weather is grim so can't complain. How've you been? X

me: Yeah it's been pretty bad but spring is on it's way so the weather'll be getting much better very soon whereabouts do you work then?

girl: I hope so! It's my birthday next month too so hoping for some sunshine. I'm an operational manager in DVLA Swansea. What about you?

me: Well with all those beaches in swansea and sunshine coming it looks like you're going to have a right blast when your birthday comes next month we should meet for a tea/coffee soon, what does your schedule look like for the next week?

girl: Yeah sounds good. Where are you from? I'm working all next week Monday to Friday so depends when you wanted to do something

me: Ok cool, are you around this weekend? We could meet in Cardiff, there are a few nice little places we could go to.

girl: Hey not this weekend I'm bonkers sorry. Do you live in Cardiff?

me: ok no worries, well we could meet tuesday night after you finish work if you don't finish too late. what time's good for you?


Then no reply. That was friday last week. Then last night I shot her a text saying this:

me: Hey ****, I remember you being supper cute and I want to meet you out. Just a drink or coffee. If it's weird at all you can just say you have to wash your cat or something ;-) and leave whenever with no pressure whatsoever. Now what day/time works for you?

She then responded today this afternoon saying:

girl: Hey **** it's not weird I just don't hear from you very much that's all.

I then tried calling her tonight as all texting failed. Don't know what to do now to salvage the situation. What do you think I should do. I know you guys are going to say that I just should next her but the thing is I like a challenge so wondering what I should do if there is anything I could do. Also, where did I go wrong?

 

[HellAtlantic]

Your texts seem to be a bit too wordy. I sometimes suffer from the same thing which is why I'll type out my text and before I hit send I see what I can take out.

Also you're basically having a convo via text which many around here advise against. Everyone seems to advocate using texts for logistics and setting up face to face.

If I were you, if she were to reengage you, I would playfully text her as a response to the next question/topic "woah woah missy, save that for when we meet over coffee. (Regardless whether you previously arranged a coffee date or not) let's cut the chit chat for now and get together on....[give her one or two days to choose from]." There. Either she'll be down to meet up or she won't. Some girls aren't necessarily challenges, some girls very well may just want you hanging around as an orbiter. Screen accordingly. Have an abundance mentality. If you were a guy with 10+ girls you regularly hooked up with do you think you'd invest much time in this one chick who keeps cutting off communication with you? Most likely you wouldn't invest much time.

Good luck bro!

 

[killerman]

Well in the past whenever I didn't bother with the chit chat and just asked the girl out as soon as she got back in contact, she would disappear straight away. This is why I followed the advice in the article "what to do when she gets back in contact" and have a conversation, ignoring her questions thus creating mystery and intrigue, and then asking for the date. So really, according to the article I actually did everything right, which makes me wonder where exactly did I go wrong? I know 100% that if i'd gone and asked for the date as soon as she got back in contact she would have disappeared straight away as that's what all those other girls did.

 

[Fuck This]

I've had good luck with when they reengage and I'm trying to assess their mood, saying "Hey I'm going to be on the road for a while and I shouldn't be texting. Give me a call so I don't wreck."

It's a big investment on her part if she calls you. You can tell a lot about her mood through her voice inflections and pauses.