girl goes cold after sex

[Ahart]

4th date pull, very traditional girl with ~2-3 partners lifetime (I've presented myself and am completely non judgemental) so I believe, maybe I'm naive. I get her to my bed with no lmr at all after about an hour of soft escalation/conversation while watching a non interesting movie. fuck her really badly, go soft a few minutes in and can't get hard again.

as she leaves she implicitly cancels plans with me that we set up, avoids eye contact with me when I walk her to her taxi, says she'll call me when she gets home doesn't. I give her a good time txt the morning after and get very curt txt back, call her and no pick up/response.

whats the play here, just next this?

 

[ray_zorse]

Chase says if you penetrate her your chances of seeing her again go up a lot, even if it's a soft entry... but I think if you do it on a 4th date then the rules change a lot, you were firmly in boyfriend / chasing territory putting her firmly in control, she was evaluating you as bf and giving you a chance, but you had to be good. Typically in such cases, if she's still interested after 4 dates you have quite a strong emotional connection and the sexual tension has been building for quite a while and the sex is a great, emotional release... why wasn't it like that, were you "meh" on her, or waa it performance anxiety, or you just having a bad day (tired, had fapped recently, etc)...? Or was it that she wasn't responding to you the way you expected/wanted and it turned you off (too passive, too inexperienced, etc)...?

Anyway, you got a lay, you stud Next time will be better

Ray

 

[Ahart]

she was about a half hour late to our date so thinking she flaked I fapped (shes a lot higher quality then I'm used to so I was frustrated, a solid 9 while I'm used to 5s/6s at this point) really really bad idea. Live and learn I guess. She also just lay there the whole time, wouldn't take off her bra (I pulled it down after eating her out a bit) and would not let me see her naked with the lights on which kinda made me nervous.

Theres no chance to save this? I guess just wait on her to contact me right?

oh this is also in a small town in japan so 4th date to her is like super super fast on my part. She even accused me of being a player during our hour escalation (am I just going to be another notch? little does she know lol)

 

[ray_zorse]

I see, hahahaha well you have to see the funny side, try to see it from the viewpoint of abundance: Your pleasure comes first. Always. By being late, and her poor communication, she shafted herself out of a great lay that clearly had a lot of emotion and investment behind it. She had a chance to recover, by being super sexy and getting you in the moment (experienced girls will do this -- they've seen a soft cock before and it's no biggie to them, they want to get laid so they'll just shift focus until you relax a bit)... but, she blew it. Her loss. Remember you're a high value man. You come first. I would look at all the positives here

Also, tell me more, I'll be in Japan next month, where are you located? Are you Japanese, or are you a visitor there? And, I can conclusively disagree with what you said, JP girls are just like any other girl, they will bang you on the first date, country girl or not. My most recent lay in JP was just such a girl and she put out on the first date (in the love hotel she was just shaking her head and thinking OMG what am I about to do, I laughed my ass off at this)... your problem is your frame control and your lover vibe. Go read articles and keep in mind the articles apply to JP or any other culture.

Ray

 

[Ahart]

Yeah you are right, even tho I try to act like a lover I think women subconsiously know I'm a provider

I'm in Konan, ~100k people, not exactly tiny. I'm chinese/korean and speak pretty good JP (look JP too) so that probally puts me in the bf camp.

Are you going to be visiting the big cities? Looking forward to reading your trs in JP, good luck.