A
Anonymous
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First time poster here. Someone please help me. siighh..
Having trouble with a girl I was seeing and getting over her.
Met a girl online and we hit it off pretty good. We'd talk for hours on the phone multiple times and she seemed super into me. Went on 2 dates. They went well. Third date she came over and we made dinner together and watched a movie and then hooked up and had sex. She ended up sleeping over because she missed the last train home. We did pretty much everything that night with eachother and talked all night.
Next day she complains I got her sick and she seems distant instantly. we text here and there for a day or two and then she says she realizes shes upset with me. I tell her I'm sorry I got her sick (I had been sick earlier but was feeling better and she knew this beforehand) and that I rushed things and that I liked her and wanted to see her again. She also said she felt super weird about what happened and that she doesnt usually do that and that I was moving too fast for her. We kept talking on the phone and I kept asking when she was free and she kept putting it off saying she was busy. She is busy but when you want to see someone you make time for them, obviously.
A week later, I'm still hanging in there and I thought things were smoothing out and she was less distant. Then she says for the first time "maybe we shouldnt meet up at all''. I call her and ask her why and she says a few reasons, mainly because its too weird now and also because she feels I want a relationship right away and shes not ready to jump into one. I tell her I like her and I like being around her and that we can take it as slow as she wants and I asked her if she had made a final decision with regards to what she said. She said no and I said that I didn't want to chase her around and if she wasnt into me then to just say it. She didn't. So I started making plans to go out and she still wasnt fully committing but she seemed more open to the idea but ended up bailing on a few occassions.
Now a week after that, I've slowed down contact with her because I feel I need to give her space. But our conversations that last few times we've spoken havent been great and shes seemed resentful and seems like shes taking me for granted now. I kind of ignored her for a couple days and she reached out to me (for once) and asked why i was eating a certain food (snapchat post) we shared on a date without her, as a joke obviously. she also posted of bunch of pics of herself partying which seemed like she was directing at me. She has been very busy with school and I have stopped contacting her for the past few days.
Not sure where to take this now. Half of me feels I need to just forget her and move on and the other half wants to leave no rock unturned in case there was a chance. I know shes playing games, maybe to keep me as an option but I want
I really like this girl and for once in my life my intentions were pure but I guess I rushed it and scared her off. I liked her personality and being around her more than her looks and I love her quirky personality. Please give me any ideas on how I can win her back. I have her on all social media sites which will make it awkward if I'm trying to forget her too.
The things I felt I did wrong was 1. rushing the sex and intimacy part, 2. being too available to her and being too persistent and not concentrating on my own life and my hobbies first. I kind of just put her first in line for everything. 3. felt I wasnt conversating as well after we had sex because things got more awkward.
shes 23, im 29. shes super quirky and awkward I guess sometimes. shes a student and waitress.
Thanks for reading and let me know if theres any clarifying needed to be made.
Hoping for some good advice, thanks in advance.
Having trouble with a girl I was seeing and getting over her.
Met a girl online and we hit it off pretty good. We'd talk for hours on the phone multiple times and she seemed super into me. Went on 2 dates. They went well. Third date she came over and we made dinner together and watched a movie and then hooked up and had sex. She ended up sleeping over because she missed the last train home. We did pretty much everything that night with eachother and talked all night.
Next day she complains I got her sick and she seems distant instantly. we text here and there for a day or two and then she says she realizes shes upset with me. I tell her I'm sorry I got her sick (I had been sick earlier but was feeling better and she knew this beforehand) and that I rushed things and that I liked her and wanted to see her again. She also said she felt super weird about what happened and that she doesnt usually do that and that I was moving too fast for her. We kept talking on the phone and I kept asking when she was free and she kept putting it off saying she was busy. She is busy but when you want to see someone you make time for them, obviously.
A week later, I'm still hanging in there and I thought things were smoothing out and she was less distant. Then she says for the first time "maybe we shouldnt meet up at all''. I call her and ask her why and she says a few reasons, mainly because its too weird now and also because she feels I want a relationship right away and shes not ready to jump into one. I tell her I like her and I like being around her and that we can take it as slow as she wants and I asked her if she had made a final decision with regards to what she said. She said no and I said that I didn't want to chase her around and if she wasnt into me then to just say it. She didn't. So I started making plans to go out and she still wasnt fully committing but she seemed more open to the idea but ended up bailing on a few occassions.
Now a week after that, I've slowed down contact with her because I feel I need to give her space. But our conversations that last few times we've spoken havent been great and shes seemed resentful and seems like shes taking me for granted now. I kind of ignored her for a couple days and she reached out to me (for once) and asked why i was eating a certain food (snapchat post) we shared on a date without her, as a joke obviously. she also posted of bunch of pics of herself partying which seemed like she was directing at me. She has been very busy with school and I have stopped contacting her for the past few days.
Not sure where to take this now. Half of me feels I need to just forget her and move on and the other half wants to leave no rock unturned in case there was a chance. I know shes playing games, maybe to keep me as an option but I want
I really like this girl and for once in my life my intentions were pure but I guess I rushed it and scared her off. I liked her personality and being around her more than her looks and I love her quirky personality. Please give me any ideas on how I can win her back. I have her on all social media sites which will make it awkward if I'm trying to forget her too.
The things I felt I did wrong was 1. rushing the sex and intimacy part, 2. being too available to her and being too persistent and not concentrating on my own life and my hobbies first. I kind of just put her first in line for everything. 3. felt I wasnt conversating as well after we had sex because things got more awkward.
shes 23, im 29. shes super quirky and awkward I guess sometimes. shes a student and waitress.
Thanks for reading and let me know if theres any clarifying needed to be made.
Hoping for some good advice, thanks in advance.
" So really, she's not upset because you got her sick. People got sick all the time! She was testing how strong you are. Then right after you got needy and "failed her test", she starts to re-evaluate her decision to sleep with you, e.g. buyer's remorse and start to backwards rationalize and say you move too fast. 