Girl ignores the "asking out" portion of a text, but responds to other parts?

[perpetualsun]

Hey guys,

I recently have had this happen a few times, where a girl would respond back to a text, but sidesteps the "asking out" portion. In other words, if I said I just got back from traveling somewhere, and then asked her when she was free for dinner, she would only ask how traveling has been, but does not address the dinner part.

In such cases, its hard for me to figure out what to do. I feel like if I respond to her, it appears to her I am chasing, but if I don't respond, it goes nowhere.

Any ideas on how I can bridge the gap and continue something? I know that by her not responding, shes either playing games or just not interested. It may be best to just not respond, but wanted to hear some thoughts on this.

 

[Michal]

Re: Girl ignores the "asking out" portion of a text, but responds to other parts

For this particular reason it is best to not include multiple questions or topics like this in one stream of texts. Girls will react to only part of it if they see fit. If she asked about your travels, you can text her something like let's meet for a coffee and I can tell you all about it. When are you free?
She will most likely say she is super busy this entire week because of bla bla bla. That is judging solely on the fact that she side-stepped it like this, which is the most convenient way for her to let you down.

 

[perpetualsun]

Re: Girl ignores the "asking out" portion of a text, but responds to other parts

For this particular reason it is best to not include multiple questions or topics like this in one stream of texts. Girls will react to only part of it if they see fit. If she asked about your travels, you can text her something like let's meet for a coffee and I can tell you all about it. When are you free?
She will most likely say she is super busy this entire week because of bla bla bla. That is judging solely on the fact that she side-stepped it like this, which is the most convenient way for her to let you down.

Thanks, you're absolutely correct and dead on. I actually messaged her yesterday telling her about my travels, then asking how shes been. She then proceeded to say

"perhaps next week will work better since I'm away this weekend!" then she proceeded to fire out a bunch of stuff about how shes been doing and so forth, then asks what kind of new things I've been doing. The general tone is sort of enthusiastic.

How would you recommend I proceed? Should I wait until next week for a final shot at her, or should I ball in court her now (second time I'm asking her where shes given resistance)? Thanks.

 

[Fluxcapacitor]

Re: Girl ignores the "asking out" portion of a text, but responds to other parts

Perpetualsun dude! A reccomend ya ball in her court her. A know typically ya should try 3 times but she's side stepped ya twice an getting into conversation. This is either boyfriend or orbiter territory, an if it was boyfriend she'd be more willing to meet.

Ya might build comfort which helps a bit if she's on the fence but it's a lot of investment hoping she'll come around. This will lose attraction. A think this sounds like a dead end but a ball in her court will let her know it's up to her now. Ya not gonna keep going ya want what ya want an ya have options if she's not interested dude

 

[perpetualsun]

Re: Girl ignores the "asking out" portion of a text, but responds to other parts

Perpetualsun dude! A reccomend ya ball in her court her. A know typically ya should try 3 times but she's side stepped ya twice an getting into conversation. This is either boyfriend or orbiter territory, an if it was boyfriend she'd be more willing to meet.

Ya might build comfort which helps a bit if she's on the fence but it's a lot of investment hoping she'll come around. This will lose attraction. A think this sounds like a dead end but a ball in her court will let her know it's up to her now. Ya not gonna keep going ya want what ya want an ya have options if she's not interested dude

Thanks for the advice, I will definitely do as you say. One thing I am not sure of is that when I send her the ball in court message to her, should I respond to her last text first? She sent me a bunch of messages just earlier talking about her week, such as how she isn’t sleeping a whole lot, how she went to a cafe, and how she is not in shape for some club sports team she is apart of. She also asked me what kind of new activities I have been doing since I had texted before I was doing some new things.

Would she find it rude or would it hurt my case if I don’t acknowledge whatever she texted me, or what she asked me, and just fire off the ball in court text? Or do you think I should acknowledge one of her messages, tell her what new things I’ve been up to, THEN fire off the ball in court text? Such as,

hey! Hope your sporting match goes well, I have been learning to sail and been doing volunteer stuff, so it seems you’ve been really busy, .....[ball in court text goes here]

Thank you!

 

[naturalmikey]

Re: Girl ignores the "asking out" portion of a text, but responds to other parts

Get more numbers. You’ll figure stuff out with a lot of experience. If you care enough about this text to write a post therein lies the problem. I’ve been there.

 

[Fluxcapacitor]

Re: Girl ignores the "asking out" portion of a text, but responds to other parts

Perpetualsun dude! Would it be rude to ignore part of the message? She didn't consider if it was rude to ignore ya dude.

Might it hurt ya chances? Maybe but they're slim anyway. Pick one thing to respond to. A world suggest hope ya match goes well cause it shows consideration but don't reward her telling her what ya been doing. Why validate yourself to her? If she wants to know about ya she can come out an meet ya dude. Otherwise it's wasted time an effort to go nowhere!

 

[perpetualsun]

Re: Girl ignores the "asking out" portion of a text, but responds to other parts

Perpetualsun dude! Would it be rude to ignore part of the message? She didn't consider if it was rude to ignore ya dude.

Might it hurt ya chances? Maybe but they're slim anyway. Pick one thing to respond to. A world suggest hope ya match goes well cause it shows consideration but don't reward her telling her what ya been doing. Why validate yourself to her? If she wants to know about ya she can come out an meet ya dude. Otherwise it's wasted time an effort to go nowhere!

Thanks, this makes a lot of sense. I will just cut things off and do other, more productive things with my time. I appreciate the wisdom!

 

[perpetualsun]

Re: Girl ignores the "asking out" portion of a text, but responds to other parts

Perpetualsun dude! Would it be rude to ignore part of the message? She didn't consider if it was rude to ignore ya dude.

Might it hurt ya chances? Maybe but they're slim anyway. Pick one thing to respond to. A world suggest hope ya match goes well cause it shows consideration but don't reward her telling her what ya been doing. Why validate yourself to her? If she wants to know about ya she can come out an meet ya dude. Otherwise it's wasted time an effort to go nowhere!

One quick question, she messaged saying that she saw me on a bus today (which actually happened). Do I respond to this or is it just a random text I shoudl stay silent on?

 

[zappbrannigan]

Re: Girl ignores the "asking out" portion of a text, but responds to other parts

One quick question, she messaged saying that she saw me on a bus today (which actually happened). Do I respond to this or is it just a random text I shoudl stay silent on?

Objectively speaking, she's reached out to you. Take it at face value and extend an invitation to meet up. Then leave the ball in her court.

 

[Fluxcapacitor]

Re: Girl ignores the "asking out" portion of a text, but responds to other parts

If ya cut things off without ball in her courting her then a agree with zappbrannigan. It's a low effort ping from her though, it can be turned around an extending an invitation while it's recent is a good call dude.

 

[perpetualsun]

Re: Girl ignores the "asking out" portion of a text, but responds to other parts

If ya cut things off without ball in her courting her then a agree with zappbrannigan. It's a low effort ping from her though, it can be turned around an extending an invitation while it's recent is a good call dude.

If you’ve already ball in courted her, do you respond to things like that? Just concerned she may go into autorejection if she sends a bunch of messages that are not about meeting up, but which I ignore. Do you only respond to messages about meeting up after ball in court texts?

 

[Michal]

Re: Girl ignores the "asking out" portion of a text, but responds to other parts

If ya cut things off without ball in her courting her then a agree with zappbrannigan. It's a low effort ping from her though, it can be turned around an extending an invitation while it's recent is a good call dude.

If you’ve already ball in courted her, do you respond to things like that? Just concerned she may go into autorejection if she sends a bunch of messages that are not about meeting up, but which I ignore. Do you only respond to messages about meeting up after ball in court texts?

Keep in mind women are not leaders. If you respond to it, it needs to be low effort and not long. If you saw her or if you suspect she knows you noticed her, you kinda need to react. Otherwise it might look to her you either ignore her on purpose or you are hurt she did not go on a date with you = outcome dependent = not a guy for her. My text game is pretty shit recently, I fail misserably.
But if you two were very playful with one another and she messaged just "saw you in the bus today" .. I would probably respond with something like "stalker! *blows rape whistle*" just for fun.
But as I said, my text game is shit past month so .. the better approach might be to throw in some subtle chase frame.