Girl is cold over text, how to not chase

[Corsica]

Hi Everyone,

I'm trying to figure this situation out. How do you respond to a girl that is a bit cold over text and seems to be in auto-rejection?

As an example. I met a girl last fall, we went out once, but life got in the way and I didn't get back to her for some time, like a week or so (nothing much physical happened on first date, though we enjoyed each other's company). When I did ask her out again she said she was too busy. She gave me this excuse a couple weeks in a row, so I just moved on. This was in like September. So last night I figured it was worth a shot texting her to see how she's been. I sent her a very warm text following Chase's guidelines: including her name and showing genuine interest in her. I didn't ask her out though because it had been a while and I felt I needed to warm her up a little. Well I sent her that text at like 9:15 last night. She got back to me at 10:30 this morning, but her text seemed pretty stale, this is what she said: "Just school and hanging out with people. School's been fun I like it". This seems weird to me. Why respond just to be so boring and unengaging?

So my question is, where would you guys go from here? I have a hard time even responding to such a text without feeling like I'm chasing. She didn't even say Hi or ask about me. How do I go forward without chasing?

Thanks!

 

[Eric]

I'd try to move the interaction forward and then move on if she doesn't. "Grab a coffee with me soon", she'll most likely be like "okay" and then not schedule. Move onto new girls and then in like 6 months text her something like "Sorry we never got coffee, I kinda disappeared for a bit my life has been really crazy lately."

 

[Franco]

Corsica,

Why respond just to be so boring and unengaging?

Women (especially younger ones) are always looking for validation that men desire them at every point in their life. There isn't a single moment where a girl ever goes, "I'm set! Men like me! I will always have provider and a lover in my life until I die! I no longer need men to chase me!"

It. will. never. happen.

So, when girls send responses as vague as the one you received, don't think too much into it. She probably just wants to make sure she has a nice guy around in the future in case she has a change of heart. What she doesn't realize though is that something between you two will never happen. Why? Because some other guy will become more involved with her before you ever do.

So my question is, where would you guys go from here?

This one sounds like it was pretty dead in the water after your first date. And you even gave her an "aloof" period of a couple of weeks and she still didn't get back to you, so that's a pretty good sign that there's a lack of interest/enthusiasm on her part.

How do I go forward without chasing?

There's no way to move forward here without chasing, which is why I suggest moving on. =)

- Franco