Girl sends me a joke before we meet, do you / how would you reply?

[perpetualsun]

Hey everyone!

Long story short I met a girl on tinder, then she agrees to go out with me for a drink later in the week. After I get her number and had agreed to meet up, I text her the usual,

"this is james, save my number! ".

then, she responds to this by texting back:

"no, im gonna lose it"

followed by:
"just kidding "

I then respond back,

"hahaha".


At this point, I was wondering if anyone would know how to reply in a situation like this. I know Chase is against excessive communication after you had agreed to a date and before you meet her, but at the same time I have had some girls who get flaky if I dont respond to some random question they pose in between texting and the date.

Additionally, if I respond with a joke that doesn't go well, her impression will go down. Would anyone have any ideas how they would typically handle something like this? Thanks!

 

[ray_zorse]

It depends how IDGAF you want to play it... I would have texted back "it's only fair to warn you that that would earn you a spanking" or something similar, this often loses me the interaction but I do not really care since I do a shit ton of approaches and I'm keen to screen out those who aren't down for sexual flirting (equivalent in this case would be you get a shit ton of tinder matches). Having said that, if you can get them out on a date you can do a lot of shit that wouldn't fly by text, so maybe it is best to be conservative by text. At the end of the day it depends if you are really into her, if so play it safe, at least in the texting department. Otherwise amuse yourself.

Another thing to bear in mind is if you are the last person to text in the interaction it gives her some power (in this case your "hahaha" response) so I try to respond only to important texts and otherwise leave them hanging for a day or two, then restart on a different topic... again this can lose you the interaction with girls that do not accept your frame, they are probably trouble anyway.

cheers, Ray

 

[Ross]

Humor in text form feels really uncooperative to me. I think that your reply was fine; any "interpretations" on her part are just from her over-thinking things.

However, like ray said, sending the last text is something to avoid. In order to prevent flakiness in general, text girls before the date. Not much else you can do to prevent flaking... Often times the reasons are all in her head.

 

[NarrowJ]

I don't crack jokes or laugh at women's jokes via text hardly at all anymore. Just gives off too much of that "I'm here to impress you" vibe.

Have you ever felt how it feels when you crack a joke to a female via text and she doesn't even laugh? Well... make her feel that way instead.

Her: No I'm gonna lose it. Just kidding
You: (no response)

...and now she's in a position where she's tried to lure you in with her humor and failed, and ninety percent of the time, she'll make subsequent attempts.

If you respond too warmly to her humor, she'll see you as easy to impress. If you respond in a cold way, like just "Ok", then you're going to come off a bit assholish and risk her auto-rejecting on you.

You can respond (much later) with a short "lol" followed by your date request like this:

Her: No I'm gonna lose it. Just kidding

(next day)
You: Lol. So when's good to grab that coffee, missy?

By that time she's spent enough mental cycles on it that you can throw her an LOL and get virtually the same result.


J.J.