Maybe in the 2nd or 3rd message i can offhandedly mention meeting her. “When I see you in person we gotta fix that” or something similar, right?
"When I see you in person" is more of a medium close really. You are basically asking her out without being totally direct about it. Drop that too soon and it might feel a little presumptuous, or even chasing.
One way to build comfort, look for more moments when you can frame things as "we." I see a perfect opportunity in your text exchange when she asks if you're Naija, then you ask her if shes Naija and she's like "Hell yeah." You could have totally slipped in a simple little "We so Naija!" highlighting the commonality you two have and planting the first "we" frame. If you sprinkle in we statements here and there it becomes just a normal feature in the way you two talk to each other. That way when you get to soft close/hard close stuff it is already baked in that "We gotta check it out" just makes sense.
I wouldn't say 2nd or 3rd message in per se, but think about it more like a process where you are juggling a few main conversational elements necessary to get her out on a date (sexual tension/flirtation-comfort/rapport-a sense of direction), you want to plant seeds whenever a good opportunity arises. Plant the seeds as soon as makes sense. Plant them early and often. Start small and build from there. Each small seed you plant sets a precedence for the next one, each building on the each other.
Here are some was you can get in front of the frame and lead the convo
Suggestive comments. Suggestive doesn't only mean suggestive of sex, you can suggest comfort, or familiarity, or suggest where things might be headed "toss me your number and we'll get into something delicious"( doing a soft close after you two have been building rapport talking about food)
"Bet" is a good way of suggesting things "Dang you studying hard. Bet you're gonna live it up this weekend though" (suggesting that she is looking for fun this weekend)
"Bet you had a blast"
Asking leading questions "You this witty irl, or just on insta?" (qualifying and suggesting)
"hey you like creative experiences, right?"
Honestly, when texting I tend to keep questions to a minimum and prefer to lead with statements and observations, but they do have a place in rapport building. Mostly though I save questions for more practical logistic things.
If you need to build some more rapport though ask questions about her life and what not. Try and get a sense what she's about.
Also share info about yourself bits info about your self that relate to what she tells you so she gets a sense what your about.
Again a little can go a long way so you don't need to get stuck in endless friendly banter. Just enough that she gets a sense there is a real person on the other side of the phone. Can often happen within a couple back and forth texts between you two.
Using evocative words.
"we" "us" "our" evoke a sense of togetherness (just don't over do it to where it loses gravity)
"We so naija"
"we turnin heads when we come on the scene"
"looking forward to our little rendevous"
"They got nothing on us"
Words like "sublime" or "majestic" evoke calm and comfort.
Her: How're you?
You: Watching the sunset. it's total majesty"
She says she just got out of yoga class you reply "mmm sounds sublime"
"I'm just chilling at Blue sky coffee. Cappuccinos straight-up sublime"
"Delicious" "Delectable" and "Pleasure" evoke sensuality
Her: What'd you get up to this weekend?
You: All sunshine and good times. A total pleasure! What about you?
And so on. Basically, consider what feelings you might evoke with your word choices, and what direction that could lead the convo
Stay in front of the frame. When she says something ask yourself how you can frame the next text you send in a way that either builds tension/comfort/ or a sense of direction.
Allow time for each phase to have its proper moment, and know that the process often takes time. Some girls you can get out quicker than others, and like
@Surveyor says you can always screen for dtf girls, but you might lose some girls who would otherwise be down. Especially if you are cold texting via social media. Sure there might be some girls just down and high momentum, but a lot of girls you got to take your time with and be patient. Might take a week to get her out maybe even two all depending on the momentum, how your schedules are lining up, and all of that. Shit man, sometimes might even take a month or longer. I've gotten women out months after the number close, but that might be a whole other can of worms for another post.
Let's look at all the ground that might be covered in a 10-11 day proccess, before you two are actually face to face irl
Days 1-5 (approximately)
open>build rapport/ flirt> number close> build rapport/flirt/ screen logistics> soft close>hard close (suggest a concrete date idea)>
Days 6-11 (approximately)
still haven't actually been on the date yet, so now you have another 4-5 days before you actually get her out. So you still leave some room for convo on the back end of things, to keep the ball rolling. Like lets say the date idea is grab a coffee and check out some art. Over the next few days sprinkle in more solid info about where exactly you're meeting, then what time, then maybe seal the deal with a "right on, looking forward," then day of whatever communication might be necessary
All this is to say there is a lot of ground to cover pace yourself. Yes it is important to keep momentum going, but don't rush the interaction.
Like
@DarkKnight mentioned make yourself scarce from time to time. I have found that after a number close (when doing social/app game) is often a good time to be a little more scarce. I send a text that solidifies the connection we have established. Maybe some call-back humor or even some sincerity like "Yo good connecting. We'll be in touch for sure." Then I make myself scarce for a day or two before pinging and leading things to the next phase. Knowing when to sit back and let some moments just pass can really help your pacing over an extended period of days.
I have found after the number close, and after she agrees to a solid date idea are usually good moments to hang back a little before jumping back in to keep the ball rolling. Obviously, there are of course exceptions and calibration is key, but if you find yourself thinking "this might be a good moment to hang back a bit," trust it.
Again, sometimes things move faster than others, but pace yourself. Allow each phase to have it's due moment, all while nudging things forward.
Keep your eye on the prize and don't over do it. A little does a long way. As long as there is just enough sexual tension that she knows what is on the table and what is at stake, enough comfort for her to get that you are a chill normal dude she can kick it with (a touch of rapport), and a strong sense of direction, getting together will be a no brainer.
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