Girls you SORTA know...

[Estate]

So guys,
A situation I've found myself in more lately and I'm never sure which angle to take with things...

I've been meeting a lot more people through social circle lately. However much of the time it comes like this... I'll be briefly introduced to a number of people but we'll be at a bar or club with a lot going on, loud music, etc...
So I know some stuff about the girls there, maybe we had a small chat earlier or something, but the environment doesn't really lead to anything being able to happen. It's later on when we are at the venue or I arrive at the party I was invited when I'm actually able to talk to and isolate people.
So... I SORT OF know them, i.e., we are past the pleasantries but I haven't had time with them to deep dive, push it forward, etc...

Where I never know how to angle it is this...
Since I'm essentially skipping the approach, the introductions and maybe even some of the light banter, I don't know how to deep dive... or if I should? Really it's because of the environment. The music is loud, the girls are dancing, the drinks are flowing. I always feel like if I isolate them and try to take it too serious then I'm bringing her "down".

Does that make any sense? I'm not sure if I should try to isolate and go straight to connection building and deep diving (which seems un-natural) or keep it light and join the party (meaning I can't really isolate or really attract her).

 

[Marty]

Estate:

I'm far from being an expert, but there is one thing I've found is useful in getting her to see you sexually, if you've already been introduced some time previous when isolation was not possible—or in social circle where things are dragged out over several brief encounters.

Once I am in the "ideal" situation (in your case, the main event of the evening), presumably isolated or at least in a one-on-one conversation where the presence of others is at most incidental, I "re-open" direct, adjusting for the fact that I already know her... tough to explain, it looks something like this:

I must say you're looking very pretty tonight, Carla

I didn't get a chance to say this earlier, Kelly, but your laugh is really cute!

You know, Anna, I've only just noticed... you have the loveliest eyes...

Needless to say, just as when opening direct and you go on immediately to introduce yourself or ask her name, here you need to move swiftly on to some other topic. "So you must tell me more about your time in the Baltics..." before she has a chance to respond, so that it doesn't look as if you're angling for a "thank-you" and seeking approval.

Make any sense?
-Marty

 

[Marty]

Estate:

I just realized I actually used this "re-opening" technique to reasonable effect only last week. Scroll down in that linked report to the first indented dialog (immediately preceded by "I stop her with a touch to the upper arm"—you can use that as a search term). At this point I had just re-engaged after abandoning her for an hour and a half.

Re-analyzing the interaction in my mind, I think the only reason I was able to escalate as far as I did was because I used this backhanded compliment early on ("I saw a beautiful tall girl with lovely long red hair walking down the street here: could that have been you?") and because I consciously set myself apart from the group in the previous stage of the interaction (search for "I have not yet opened my mouth once since PacificBeauty arrived").

No idea whether this helps but at least it'll bump your post, which I think is a very interesting one )

-Marty

 

[Zoro]

This is sort of vague, but perhaps you'll like it as much as I did when I heard it.
"Be the flame, not the moth"

While your out with these new people you might have the urge to get to know them and make something productive happen. If you come at it from an angle where it's already been productive, you've met some cool new people, the night is young, ripe for fun and its possible that something might happen but are detached from the outcome and could careless if it does. That I think would be a powerful frame and magnetic. You can still actively try and make something happen in an upbeat, can you feel what I'm feeling way, rather than serious and If only we could feel that way.

Hope I haven't lost you on that.
There's a dude, manwhore.org, that has that magnetic, flame kind of personality. At least I'm effected by it. When he's out, he's having fun, the cool people and women he meets are just a bonus.