Going to meet her and her friends vs refusing and seing her on a date only

[razir110]

Hi everyone!

Great forum with loads great input lately.

What about this one? Has been happening SO much lately.

A met this girl from my uni. We have attraction between us and I asked her out and she counter-offered to join her and her friends at some bar. So now I have two option, both with their pros and cons:

1) Accept the bar with friends thing. Pros: I can go there, show how social I am, ignore her and flirt with other girls to show she's is not my only choice, eventually try to make a hit on her, but here come the con: her friends are there, so it will be next to impossible to take her home or to even make up with her. So there will be nothing at the end of the night and I will still have to see her again.. on a date!

2)Insist that I want to see her and her only and not her bunch of friends. Pros: Show that I am not into beating around the bush and that I am not into meeting her in some sort of comfortable environment for her, I want intimacy with her and this is my statement. If she does like that she will go on the date and it's ideal.
Cons: She may prefer the comfortable environment to build rapport with me. She may be intimidated by my insistence of seeing her and only her. She may refuse the date altogether and I lose.

So which one would you guys go with? The bold statement of "date only" or would you be ok to meet her friends and do a little game there, so to show her that she should def go on that date you first proposed?

Opinions please!

Cheers!

 

[Big Daddy]

Don't go to the bar because

- you want to date on your terms
- the chances of you getting cock blocked by a friend of her are way higher
- it let her know that you want to fuck her

So insist in a one-on-one date. You don't need to say DATE ONLY BISH, you can say you'd rather meet in a less chaotic environment one-on-one because it's better to talk.

 

[razir110]

@Big Daddy

Thank you for your input. You see and what if she keeps insisting on the bar meeting and kinda refuses my date requests? Should I still press on the date? Or in that case I should back down and accept the bar event? If I keep insisting on the date, I will become more and more insisting and will become more available and needy in her eyes. What you think of this? Not to mention the bar thing is a great chance to meet more women! The only problems is that most likely nothing much will happen there in terms of sex. It would all be for PR image building.

 

[mindful]

Second what Big Daddy said.

I would tell her to have fun with her friends and you two can meet up another time. Continue to meet more girls and hit her up 3-5 days later and propose a meet up. There is a chance it will backfire but you don't wanna meet her with her friends.

 

[razir110]

Thank you both for your replies.

I mean since I'm asking her out isn't it already clear I want to fuck her anyways? So meeting her and friends could set the tone for the date or, just meet another girl and ask that girl out, well I totally agree with what you are saying and this is what Ive been doing, but in most cases we don't end meeting 1on1 at all and then I feel I missed the opportunity to meet her girlfriends and take on them for ex.

 

[Regal Tiger]

Second what Big Daddy said.

I would tell her to have fun with her friends and you two can meet up another time. Continue to meet more girls and hit her up 3-5 days later and propose a meet up. There is a chance it will backfire but you don't wanna meet her with her friends.

+1 here as well but want to also add in that if it does 'backfire' and you never score that date there's a 99.9999999999999% chance you were never going to fuck her in the history of ever anyways. At least this way you save time and she may even respect you a little more giving you a better chance way on down the road

 

[razir110]

Hum, so is it that the "meet me with my friends" thing is a sort of limbo girls that are not that interested put you in? So to sort of keep you around and at the same time not to turn you down completely?

But in that case.. Ones she proposes the bar with friends, shouldn't we assume straight away she wants nothing? In that case what's the point of even saying the "i want to see yo 1on1" thing?

Shouldn't we just take it as lack of interest? In this case why not meet her friends and just flirt with other people? Wouldn't that make her change her mind about you? And if not, who cares, you could simply score another girl at her expense sort of say.

Do you guys get my point here? Because honestly all the times I said i want to meet her and her only I never met her lol. So maybe the best course of action in these cases is to actually go for the friends programme and play around with it!

What do you guys think?

 

[Big Daddy]

You can only really say she's not reeeeeeeally into it if she keeps dodging and suggesting her shit. If she really likes you she'll go do whatever. She may suggest bar with friends just because, then see you're actually talking business.

If it is the case that she's turning you down constantly but you still want to go there, GO DO IT. A bunch of people recommend you next girls way too quickly. But go there. Go figure for yourself. You might play your cards right and get some preselection, who knows?

 

[mindful]

If this is your first time asking her and this is what she said I would just meet her another time. But yeah, if you wanna go just for the heck of it and see what happens then do it up. Just remain outcome independent and focus on being social and a fun guy... the last thing you want is to be a burden to her and her friends.

 

[Tim Iron]

This has happened to me a number of times, what I just do is to reschedule once I find out she is coming along with her friends.

Meeting a lady with her friends just means you might be pushed to spend money on expensive food and drinks... and you still might not be able to get anywhere with her. If you don't meet up to her friends' expectation they might just end up ruining whatever chances you had with her...

If she brings up the issue that she is scarred of meeting you one on one ... remind her that you are meeting in a public place ...

So, just reschedule your meet (date) and if she refuses to see you because you canceled the meet (date) that was supposed to include her friends, just move on.

 

[razir110]

Cool, guys thank you for your inputs.

So yeah I guess you should kinda treat the meet-with-friends plans with the same interest level as hers. By this I mean if you are not that much into her anyways and have nothing better to do, then go meet her friends, if you have serious intentions to take her to bed then stick to 1-on-1.

Am I correct here?

Plus, as usual, if you are talking to women all the time, you have plenty of options, so no need for all this friends BS unless you have a gap in your schedule with nothing better to do.

 

[Regal Tiger]

Cool, guys thank you for your inputs.

So yeah I guess you should kinda treat the meet-with-friends plans with the same interest level as hers. By this I mean if you are not that much into her anyways and have nothing better to do, then go meet her friends, if you have serious intentions to take her to bed then stick to 1-on-1.

Am I correct here?

Plus, as usual, if you are talking to women all the time, you have plenty of options, so no need for all this friends BS unless you have a gap in your schedule with nothing better to do.

Exactly