Gym openers

[average_daygamer]

Guys, I'm telling you, yesterday was ridiculous in the gym. For a small quiet town, I was really surprised. If was peak time 1500-1700 but still. And they are all middle class!

I like to keep things straightforward.

My go to opener is "Hi, I think you look great, do you want to swap phone numbers"

Which I believe is too direct, it's 0-100 too quickly.

Also due to it's directness, I find it hard to get the balls to deploy, especially with meat heads in earshot.

But then what I like about it, is that it will filter for interested girls.

These are some other openers, but I find fault with them:

"Hey, it looks like you are having a bumper session on this machine/workout"

I was on a workout session yesterday and my energy was low (I was leaving too much time in-between sets) so I didn't feel like I had the energy to overcome the approach anxiety, despite there being a girl with a pony tail who really reminded me of Laura Croft.

But she was pretty hard core into her workout and I found it hard to believe she wouldn't have a boyfriend.
Problem: it implies you have been keeping track of her workout.

"How many sets do you have left"

Problem: It's a closed question and she most likely might think that you want to use the machine and nothing else.

"Hey, you look GREAT, I just thought I should come over and introduce myself"

Problem: You are complimenting her appearance, that she already knows and then introducing yourself, but not giving her anything to reply to.

"Hi, I just noticed how dedicated you are to working out, you do a really good job"

Problem: this one isn't too bad actually. But it does imply that you have been taking notice or keeping some sort of track of her.

 

[KJ Francis]

Hi, I think you look great, do you want to swap phone numbers

How REAL Direct Game Works... Compared with Neo-Direct

Real direct game has a lot of nuance and flavor that overly simplistic “neo-direct” lacks. What are the differences? All spelled out for you to see. Hey guys, and welcome back. Contents I. Real Direct Game The Use of Pre-opening Techg The Not-So-Direct Approach II. Frame Control Calibration...

www.girlschase.com

This is neo direct, worse than direct. Gym is like social circle, better indirect.

I think some guys have had success with complimenting gym outfits or shoes (NOT her overall looking great).

Indirect game would be chatting about working out (situationally relevant). I would use body rocking like you are on your way back to your workout and not a risk of becoming a social burden.

Remember she is in a captive environment here and has a routine of returning to the exact place, which makes you a threat to her comfort for now and also into the future.

You can tease in a way that builds her up, cold read, etc. But I would wait a minute or two until you get a subtle sign of interest from her (even just a look in her eye, her adjustment of body language toward you, or a slight brushing back of her hair). Then show more of your interest.

Direct game on a sidewalk is different because indirect doesn't really make sense if she's barreling towards you. You wouldn't just stop her to comment on the environment.

But even in a direct case, asking for a phone number right away is not a good move! You need to establish her attraction to you first, then establish your interest in her, then soft close propose a date, then swap numbers because it's natural given the date she just agreed to.

 

[KnownUniverse]

How REAL Direct Game Works... Compared with Neo-Direct

Real direct game has a lot of nuance and flavor that overly simplistic “neo-direct” lacks. What are the differences? All spelled out for you to see. Hey guys, and welcome back. Contents I. Real Direct Game The Use of Pre-opening Techg The Not-So-Direct Approach II. Frame Control Calibration...

www.girlschase.com

This is neo direct, worse than direct. Gym is like social circle, better indirect.

I think some guys have had success with complimenting gym outfits or shoes (NOT her overall looking great).

Indirect game would be chatting about working out (situationally relevant). I would use body rocking like you are on your way back to your workout and not a risk of becoming a social burden.

Remember she is in a captive environment here and has a routine of returning to the exact place, which makes you a threat to her comfort for now and also into the future.

You can tease in a way that builds her up, cold read, etc. But I would wait a minute or two until you get a subtle sign of interest from her (even just a look in her eye, her adjustment of body language toward you, or a slight brushing back of her hair). Then show more of your interest.

Direct game on a sidewalk is different because indirect doesn't really make sense if she's barreling towards you. You wouldn't just stop her to comment on the environment.

But even in a direct case, asking for a phone number right away is not a good move! You need to establish her attraction to you first, then establish your interest in her, then soft close propose a date, then swap numbers because it's natural given the date she just agreed to.

What are your thoughts on: open>compliment>number close?

theres a few guys on social media claiming that they don’t use any “pua strategies” to get laid they simply open like: “excuse me. You look beautiful. Are you from around here?” <she responds> then “I was wondering if I can get your number and take you I out for a drink some time”. And that’s it. They reckon they are getting dates that method which turn into lays.

honestly this seems not much different than the tiktok rizz videos.

 

[average_daygamer]

What are your thoughts on: open>compliment>number close?

theres a few guys on social media claiming that they don’t use any “pua strategies” to get laid they simply open like: “excuse me. You look beautiful. Are you from around here?” <she responds> then “I was wondering if I can get your number and take you I out for a drink some time”. And that’s it. They reckon they are getting dates that method which turn into lays.

honestly this seems not much different than the tiktok rizz videos.

Yeah, that is my preferred efficient method. It is easy for the girl to say yes or no and gets to the point without having to hover around and react in seconds to how she is feeling in order to not make it awkward.

That is the bit I struggle with, trying to calibrate on the fly. In years past, I have not calibrated in time (they only give you a few seconds) and the girl has been offended that I didn't pick the signals soon enough.

 

[average_daygamer]

I was just working up the courage to approach a girl who looks like Laura Croft at my gym and then this thread pops up on my Reddit feed:

Note to self, the algorithm is toxic, but if you do not have an account, you can't disable it!

How REAL Direct Game Works... Compared with Neo-Direct

Real direct game has a lot of nuance and flavor that overly simplistic “neo-direct” lacks. What are the differences? All spelled out for you to see. Hey guys, and welcome back. Contents I. Real Direct Game The Use of Pre-opening Techg The Not-So-Direct Approach II. Frame Control Calibration...

www.girlschase.com

This is neo direct, worse than direct. Gym is like social circle, better indirect.

I think some guys have had success with complimenting gym outfits or shoes (NOT her overall looking great).

Indirect game would be chatting about working out (situationally relevant). I would use body rocking like you are on your way back to your workout and not a risk of becoming a social burden.

Remember she is in a captive environment here and has a routine of returning to the exact place, which makes you a threat to her comfort for now and also into the future.

You can tease in a way that builds her up, cold read, etc. But I would wait a minute or two until you get a subtle sign of interest from her (even just a look in her eye, her adjustment of body language toward you, or a slight brushing back of her hair). Then show more of your interest.

Direct game on a sidewalk is different because indirect doesn't really make sense if she's barreling towards you. You wouldn't just stop her to comment on the environment.

But even in a direct case, asking for a phone number right away is not a good move! You need to establish her attraction to you first, then establish your interest in her, then soft close propose a date, then swap numbers because it's natural given the date she just agreed to.

My worry about seeing the girl on multiple different occasions and always having a chat is that it builds things up too much and if when you ask for the hang out she says "No" it then means that there is no point bothering to talk to her anymore.

So it just makes it awkward having to ignore her. Then you have to rinse and repeat with the others.

But asking for the hangout in the same interaction is more intuitive.

Just at the end, say you are going back to your workout then just ask "but do you want to do something outside of here".

That way if she says no, you know to leave her and not talking to her again feels normal because you had an answer.

 

[average_daygamer]

Sorry that post is wrong but there is no edit button, ignore the bit about the Reddit thread, I decided not to post it.

 

[KJ Francis]

What are your thoughts on: open>compliment>number close?

This is neo direct... No good.

The problem is you are basing your interest 100% on her looks without her earning any additional interest (meaning she does not feel qualified).

If you are that sold on taking her out before even interacting with her, this is sub communicating that you are in scarcity with women and basically have no standards beyond being extra floored by her beauty. This will signal to her that you are not preselected by other women.

It is much better to not be impressed by her beauty and instead have your interest rooted in something beyond that, which you learn about her.

Women also screen you based on your behavior, so she is not going to be sold on you immediately. You need to convey your personality a bit first.

Now if you have top tier fundamentals and she is simply a cute girl but not super hot, maybe this could work... But it's still low odds, especially in the gym social setting where she does not have a read on you yet.

If you read some direct day game lay reports like from James, Atlas, and Allen, these guys have good fundamentals and can open with compliments, but notice they are not immediately asking her out.

You still want to move her quickly and progress things, but there is some banter happening before asking her out. You just need a few minutes of patience to assess each other.

But asking for the hangout in the same interaction is more intuitive.

That is OK... You don't have to wait several days of seeing her. That could cause attraction to expire as well. But there is a middle ground between that and asking her out or for the contact details as part of the opener.

 

[POB]

This topic has been discussed to death on nextasf.
I think there's a thread about it here too, will link if I find it.

Gym is like social circle, better indirect.

Basically this
"wow, you looked powerfull doing those squats....so rare to see someone doing it properly these days"
"lemme get my anabolic water *wink* (when using the water fountain)"
"geez, this is a cool way of doing this exercise...would care to explain how you got to it?"
"can tell you get a good sense for fitness fashion"

Goal is to get her attention and build social connection to move her OUT of the gym and into a date.
You game her on the date, never at the gym (where there's a lot of social pressure and possible consequences for her).

 

[average_daygamer]

This topic has been discussed to death on nextasf.
I think there's a thread about it here too, will link if I find it.

Basically this
"wow, you looked powerfull doing those squats....so rare to see someone doing it properly these days"
"lemme get my anabolic water *wink* (when using the water fountain)"
"geez, this is a cool way of doing this exercise...would care to explain how you got to it?"
"can tell you get a good sense for fitness fashion"

Goal is to get her attention and build social connection to move her OUT of the gym and into a date.
You game her on the date, never at the gym (where there's a lot of social pressure and possible consequences for her).

Sorry, what is "nextasf"?

I also need to highlight that there is a bug with the forum search function, where if you search for the word "gym" it says that it is too common and omits it, even if paired with another word.

Anyway, thanks for the example.

Another couple of openers I've come up with are

"you look pretty dedicated..."

Or

"are you a fitness influencer?"

But, still, there are logistical issues with making a bee line towards the girl you are interested in.

I remember reading advice on such like "owning your intent" and "showing your balls", on the seduction sub Reddit which I thought meant to be bold and make a beeline towards the approachee.

But from reading this forum, it would seem that making a more incidental approach works best and my limited experience suggests that is the case also.

But sometimes if she is in a "dead end" area, it is too tricky to approach her. You can't just do it on your way to the changing rooms to get a drink or use the bathroom, for instance.

It is a rare occasion that I don't see atleast a couple of hb7+'s in the gym, way more than I see in daygame. And in theory you always have something in common, the gym and an active lifestyle.

And there really is nothing to fear but the scene in the heat of the moment. But that fear is an intense one.

All it takes is one incident to put you off for a long time.

It's a really tough nut to crack, even 1 approach per session would be a decent boost to approach numbers, partially when working full time.

But it is so hard to get the timing right. Between sets, you don't want to approach before you have worked out (would look too eager) you don't want to hang around after your workout, it is really difficult to find the right moment.

 

[average_daygamer]

This is neo direct... No good.

The problem is you are basing your interest 100% on her looks without her earning any additional interest (meaning she does not feel qualified).

If you are that sold on taking her out before even interacting with her, this is sub communicating that you are in scarcity with women and basically have no standards beyond being extra floored by her beauty. This will signal to her that you are not preselected by other women.

It is much better to not be impressed by her beauty and instead have your interest rooted in something beyond that, which you learn about her.

Women also screen you based on your behavior, so she is not going to be sold on you immediately. You need to convey your personality a bit first.

Now if you have top tier fundamentals and she is simply a cute girl but not super hot, maybe this could work... But it's still low odds, especially in the gym social setting where she does not have a read on you yet.

If you read some direct day game lay reports like from James, Atlas, and Allen, these guys have good fundamentals and can open with compliments, but notice they are not immediately asking her out.

You still want to move her quickly and progress things, but there is some banter happening before asking her out. You just need a few minutes of patience to assess each other.



That is OK... You don't have to wait several days of seeing her. That could cause attraction to expire as well. But there is a middle ground between that and asking her out or for the contact details as part of the opener.

Thanks for your long reply.

I hear you on being sold on taking her out before interacting with her. Of course, you don't want to come across that way

However, sometimes it can be quite hard to read if the girl wants the interaction or not and you want to get your answer rather than having to awkwardly re engage on a separate occasion.

You have a workout and she has a workout, which need to get done.

I think you were replying to my neo direct approach, normally I would try to expand the small talk portion before asking if you wants to hang out outside of the gym.

Also, another point, these girls are usually dressed up, I am usually wearing an old t-shirt with holes in it and old plain shorts. So I think that can add to the mismatched effect.

Just to add, I can't search for gym related forum posts because there is a bug with the search function where it says the word "gym" is too common so apologies if this gets asked a lot.

 

[POB]

Sorry, what is "nextasf"?

Another sedution forum (now RIP).

I also need to highlight that there is a bug with the forum search function, where if you search for the word "gym" it says that it is too common and omits it, even if paired with another word.

@Chase , is there's a spam filter on this word?
Search is really not working.

Anyway, thanks for the example.

No prob

Another couple of openers I've come up with are

"you look pretty dedicated..."

Nice, very casual, neutral and open ended...I like it.

Or

"are you a fitness influencer?"

Nah, too much...unless you make it as a half joke when she is really struggling with an exercise (you have to be super calibrated though)

But, still, there are logistical issues with making a bee line towards the girl you are interested in.

I remember reading advice on such like "owning your intent" and "showing your balls", on the seduction sub Reddit which I thought meant to be bold and make a beeline towards the approachee.

But from reading this forum, it would seem that making a more incidental approach works best and my limited experience suggests that is the case also.

In the gym you risk too much by being this direct.
Ppl are not there to flirt, they are there to workout.
Of course it is a social environment....this is why a casual social approach would not raise any eyebrows.

But sometimes if she is in a "dead end" area, it is too tricky to approach her. You can't just do it on your way to the changing rooms to get a drink or use the bathroom, for instance.

Best spots to open:
- treadmills/bikes/stairs
- water fountain
- massage chairs/lounge
- crossfit math (some gyms usually have them in a corner)
- stretching area

It is a rare occasion that I don't see atleast a couple of hb7+'s in the gym, way more than I see in daygame. And in theory you always have something in common, the gym and an active lifestyle.

And there really is nothing to fear but the scene in the heat of the moment. But that fear is an intense one.

Start with saying hi with a smile and gauging her response

All it takes is one incident to put you off for a long time.

Yeah, gyms are though and hard because of this...calibration is key!

It's a really tough nut to crack, even 1 approach per session would be a decent boost to approach numbers, partially when working full time.

Gyms usually you approach one hottie and that's it for the month...if you do it too much ppl will definitely notice (unless you are frequently changing gyms).

But it is so hard to get the timing right. Between sets, you don't want to approach before you have worked out (would look too eager) you don't want to hang around after your workout, it is really difficult to find the right moment.

It is....it's definitely a challenge

 

[MrVariety]

Gyms usually you approach one hottie and that's it for the month...if you do it too much ppl will definitely notice (unless you are frequently changing gyms).

I like to think in terms of "gym approach quota":

The more you befriend people - is generally social - especially gatekeepers (PTs, staff) - the more quota you have.
The better game you have - the more quota you have.
The more people around you when you approach - the more quota you use.
The more those people are regulars and know others - the more quota you use.
The more direct approach - obvious your intent - and negative response - the more quota you use.

Keeping all these in mind it's perfectly OK to talk to girls every time you go to the gym.

 

[average_daygamer]

I like to think in terms of "gym approach quota":

The more you befriend people - is generally social - especially gatekeepers (PTs, staff) - the more quota you have.
The better game you have - the more quota you have.
The more people around you when you approach - the more quota you use.
The more those people are regulars and know others - the more quota you use.
The more direct approach - obvious your intent - and negative response - the more quota you use.

Keeping all these in mind it's perfectly OK to talk to girls every time you go to the gym.

There is a difference between talking and approaching, isn't there though.

I think of approaching as being quite interuptive. For instance, she has headphones on and is looking at her phone between sets and you go up and say "hi" snapping her attention onto you. And then making a compliment/observation on her.

Whereas talking can be much more indirect and casual, only if the moment allows it. Talking is a lot less pressure and had to be congruent with the situation, whereas direct approaches are more interuptive.

Anyway, I agree with the approach quota concept as well, I've always thought of it like that, even in day game and nightgame.

 

[Lantern]

I had an idea for an opener/tech in gyms that I never got to try because I stopped going to gyms (I train at home now).

But, here it is, maybe yous guys can try it out and tell me the result:

I agree with the others gym is for indirect, and more than that, it's for playing the long game. So, when a lovely girls is near you while you're doing an exercise, you take out your phone, walk to her and go:

"Hi there! Do me a favor, can you record me with my phone while I do my next set? I want to check my technique."

Congrats, you opened and very probably got some compliance.

You do your set, and come back to her to take your phone. You thank her and drop a few words that hint that you'd like to continue talking "Thanks for that! Did it look good to you?"

At this point you need to make a read on her:
- How did she react when you asked for the favor (annoyed, perky, neutral?)
- How does she react when you asked her did it look good (one-word answer? Curt? Enthusiastic?)

You need to assess if she's up for conversation or just wants to go back to working out. If the latter, you say thanks and "see you around". If she seems up for talking, you develop a conversation. If she's game to talk, well, it's game on. I'd make sure to do a bit of vibing, ask her some questions (about gym, exercising, herself in general), do a tease ("you recorded this so well, I'll apply you for the Oscars!") and just be a cool guy. Ask her name, give her yours and say you gotta go back to exercising.

However, now, whenever you guys pass each other by in the gym, and/or the next time you see her you say hi and throw a joke/tease/question etc. Find ways to build similarity and attraction. After 2-3 times, if it's all going good, you suggest a coffee/drink/whatever. If you get rejected, just be cool, and keep doing it. Maybe she changes her mind, maybe you make a new hot-girl friend (who might introduce you to her hot girlfriends).

Anyway, as I say, untested, but feels like a plan, no?

 

[MrVariety]

There is a difference between talking and approaching, isn't there though.

I think of approaching as being quite interuptive. For instance, she has headphones on and is looking at her phone between sets and you go up and say "hi" snapping her attention onto you. And then making a compliment/observation on her.

Whereas talking can be much more indirect and casual, only if the moment allows it. Talking is a lot less pressure and had to be congruent with the situation, whereas direct approaches are more interuptive.

Anyway, I agree with the approach quota concept as well, I've always thought of it like that, even in day game and nightgame.

I use "talk" and "approach" interchangeably. I don't see the value in putting "talking" to girls and "approaching" in two separate bins. It's just on a continuum of low to high pressure.

The other day I walked up to a girl in a corner and started talking to a girl with headphones looking at her phone. She didn't hear it so I waved my arms. Then I complimented her on the way she did Bulgarian half splits. Was that an "approach?" Did I use my monthly quota? To me it felt like I was just talking to her. lol. I was just friendly, she was too and there was nobody who was uncomfortable in that conversation. Not only can I do that several times a month, I feel I can do that every day, if not multiple times a day. Where you're really using quota is when your approach is "bad."

"Sorry but we've noticed you've had too many friendly and cool interactions with women lately and we're asking you politely to stop." -no gym ever.

Game is like plastic surgery. It doesn't look like it if it's good. To the extent the approaching is high pressure, awkward, goes bad, etc. romantically direct, etc. you're using your quota. Sometimes you want to practice and experiment with high pressure for sure, but that's advanced. I would be reluctant to recommend doing an "approaches" like it's talked about here. Seems like the road for progress for you is learning social calibration e.g. minimizing pressure, not building the raw courage of maximizing it.

Mr Variety

 

[MrVariety]

Anyway, as I say, untested, but feels like a plan, no?

No.
1. It demands too much compliance at once.
2. It's not authentic. You're basically opening with a lie.
3. It's not scalable. You can't just go around in your local gyms asking girls to record you set. I mean, hello.
4. You should start off with something short and unrejectable, to ping her before continuing
5. Subjectively speaking, it seems just too obvious as a pick up trick. You don't need pick up tricks. Especially not in gyms.

Mr Variety

 

[Chase]

@POB @average_daygamer,

@Chase , is there's a spam filter on this word?
Search is really not working.

It's not a spam filter; it's that the word is too short for Xenforo to index.

Words need to have four letters and up to appear in the search. Looks like it is based upon MySQL word search limits; anything under 4 characters MySQL can't search for in the database.

As a workaround, you can search for "workout" -- that leads to a lot of gym-focused results.

Alternately, head to Google and type in

site:skilledseducer.com "gym"

... and you will get all the gym results.

Chase

 

[POB]

I like to think in terms of "gym approach quota":

The more you befriend people - is generally social - especially gatekeepers (PTs, staff) - the more quota you have.
The better game you have - the more quota you have.
The more people around you when you approach - the more quota you use.
The more those people are regulars and know others - the more quota you use.
The more direct approach - obvious your intent - and negative response - the more quota you use.

Keeping all these in mind it's perfectly OK to talk to girls every time you go to the gym.

Very nice way to reframe it.
Love your take!
I was thinking more in terms of one and done situations, but you are thinking about creating a social bubble.
If you know how to do social game, this is great way to approach it.

 

[average_daygamer]

In a pinch today, it was one of those days where at the end of my workout, the hotties started pouring in.

I was sitting on the bench observing a bubbly 2 set that were actually working out together. A tall blonde with a pony tail and a petite, slightly orange brunette also with a ponytail.

Their vibe was quite jovial, I must say, as the little brunette minx slapped her taller blonde companion on the buttocks as she was doing a bent over row.

I noticed this cheeky 2 set on the way on, they were wearing very form hugging clothes, leaving...little to the subtle lines of their curves.

Why oh why must they torment us so, with their lithe figures.

Anyway, I had finished my workout and was not in the mix to "ping," a comment and join in the melay. And I would have also struggled to match their energy levels after my workout.

Not to mention, I was observing them from afar so I would have had to go all the way over to the dumbbell rack.

But even if I was sat next to them I wouldn't know how to open a 2 set like that. For once I would have preferred a girl wearing earbuds locked into her workout!