- Joined
- Jul 17, 2014
- Messages
- 9
I stumbled upon https://www.girlschase.com/content/i-don ... replace-em but it was too late as I sent a really silly and soppy text last night..wish I read this yesterday lol..here's the story:
Met a girl through work, I made the initial move, showed interest, swapped numbers. After a few weeks messaging, I try to set up a few dates. 3/4 times in a row she flakes, according to her, due to her complicated home life. This 'complication' is that her 2 young nieces live with her who she looks after, and her mum also has a major health problems.
After all the flakes I just straight out ask her is she actually interested. Her words "you intrique me which does make me want to meet up with you, but hasnt been possible due to family life, but wont always be like that".
After a total of 2 months of messaging and still trying to get her to come out...she invites me out with some colleagues. I think OK finally I can see what the deal is. When I arrive shes a bit tipsy, after a little while takes me to the other side of the bar and we start kissing a lot, getting close etc, dancing. After a while we go back to the main group, when she basically procedes to ignore me for the rest of the night and gives attention to other guys. Im pretty confused at this point as just earlier she was all over me...and now nothing. I ask her what was the point inviting me down..kissing..then just ignoring. Her words "things are so complicated now cos of my family, live your life, if you can wait for me then good, if not then it will be my loss". At the end of the night I make sure she gets her train home, and we even end up kissing a few more times after I tell her if it's so hard for her to come out, I don't mind going to her area instead.
Few days after we exchange a few messages..and I invite her to come out the next weekend, but she can't find a babysitter. I even suggest if she can't find a babysitter, we can just go chill in the park and she can bring her nieces too. She makes an excuse about this idea, having to pick them up from school. We message a few more times but all her replies are COLD!
At this point im thinking ok Im just hitting a brick wall here...and send her a pretty long message, along the lines of "been trying for 3 months to get to know you, the good and the crazy complicated side but getting nowhere, just mixed signals. Cant be the only one putting in the effort, im gonna have to draw the line, let you do your thing, otherwise you will never appreciate."
Now I can't help but feel I shouldnt have mentioned 'appreciate' at the end, makes it sound like all I want is for her to appreciate me which sounds WAY to cry baby like. But in all honesty Ive been giving ALL the ideas, and while I understand she has stuff to deal with, surely that shouldnt stop her trying to find happiness with someone..if she wanted to. Either way the fun element has gone from our convos. Feels like she was never really interested from the start...but the whole kissing in the club thing made me feel she was...at least for those moments.
Either way Im stumped, I guess complete NO CONTACT is the way forward as I completely messed up with this girl? Oh well at least learnt for next time...
Met a girl through work, I made the initial move, showed interest, swapped numbers. After a few weeks messaging, I try to set up a few dates. 3/4 times in a row she flakes, according to her, due to her complicated home life. This 'complication' is that her 2 young nieces live with her who she looks after, and her mum also has a major health problems.
After all the flakes I just straight out ask her is she actually interested. Her words "you intrique me which does make me want to meet up with you, but hasnt been possible due to family life, but wont always be like that".
After a total of 2 months of messaging and still trying to get her to come out...she invites me out with some colleagues. I think OK finally I can see what the deal is. When I arrive shes a bit tipsy, after a little while takes me to the other side of the bar and we start kissing a lot, getting close etc, dancing. After a while we go back to the main group, when she basically procedes to ignore me for the rest of the night and gives attention to other guys. Im pretty confused at this point as just earlier she was all over me...and now nothing. I ask her what was the point inviting me down..kissing..then just ignoring. Her words "things are so complicated now cos of my family, live your life, if you can wait for me then good, if not then it will be my loss". At the end of the night I make sure she gets her train home, and we even end up kissing a few more times after I tell her if it's so hard for her to come out, I don't mind going to her area instead.
Few days after we exchange a few messages..and I invite her to come out the next weekend, but she can't find a babysitter. I even suggest if she can't find a babysitter, we can just go chill in the park and she can bring her nieces too. She makes an excuse about this idea, having to pick them up from school. We message a few more times but all her replies are COLD!
At this point im thinking ok Im just hitting a brick wall here...and send her a pretty long message, along the lines of "been trying for 3 months to get to know you, the good and the crazy complicated side but getting nowhere, just mixed signals. Cant be the only one putting in the effort, im gonna have to draw the line, let you do your thing, otherwise you will never appreciate."
Now I can't help but feel I shouldnt have mentioned 'appreciate' at the end, makes it sound like all I want is for her to appreciate me which sounds WAY to cry baby like. But in all honesty Ive been giving ALL the ideas, and while I understand she has stuff to deal with, surely that shouldnt stop her trying to find happiness with someone..if she wanted to. Either way the fun element has gone from our convos. Feels like she was never really interested from the start...but the whole kissing in the club thing made me feel she was...at least for those moments.
Either way Im stumped, I guess complete NO CONTACT is the way forward as I completely messed up with this girl? Oh well at least learnt for next time...
