Have I gotten friendzoned?

[perpetualsun]

Hey Guys,

About a month ago, I went into graduate school. I met a girl in my same program and I thought she was ok, someone I might date in the future. The biggest mistake I made was to invite her to events and do things with the people in our program, which were minimal but might have shot myself.

I had a total of 4 interactions with her. After class one day I organized a bunch of people to go eat.

Second time I interacted with her, I ran into her one day and was walking with her and she gave me signals but I didnt take them.

Third time, I met her in a library and talked with her for 2 minutes.

Now, that was about 2 weeks ago.

Recently I contacted her via text for a date and it went like so:

Me: Hey, havent seen you around recently!, I've been busy but life just cleared up recently, what do you say we grab lunch or dinner sometime?

Her: Hey, been really busy, what about next week or next weekend?

Me: Sure! Hows dinner Saturday sound?

Her: Thats good, I dont have anything planned then. Should we bring people from our program?

Me: I was planning on having dinner with just you, ur ok with that?


The reason I didnt ask her out at the time was because I was busy. Furthermore, I made a conscious effort to not have too much face time with her after I realized I actually liked her. Question is, did I get friendzoned or was she just trying to test to see if I really liked her?

 

[PrettyDecent]

perpetualsun,

I met a girl in my same program and I thought she was ok, someone I might date in the future. The biggest mistake I made was to invite her to events and do things with the people in our program, which were minimal but might have shot myself.

Sounds like you already know the deal It was probably a mix of you trying to meet her with friends (which implies you two are just friends, also) and expired attraction.

Also, meeting up/bumping into each other so many times without moving things forward gives a feeling that there's lack of momentum. She'll resign her attraction to the idea "it wasn't really destiny for the two of you to get together, anyways".

So yes, you were friend-zoned here. If there's a girl that you see yourself dating in the future, but not at the time, be sure to cut interactions very short with her, and perhaps avoid the interaction completely until you do decide to meet her. If you can position yourself as a "mysterious, sexy man" beforehand, she'll be interested to see who you really were/are

~Nick