Having Trouble with Alone Daygame

[lingua]

Past two days, I've gone out around at 15:30 for two hours each, which resulted in me only practicing my slow walk, learning to feel comfortable walking around just for the hell of it and exchanging strong eye contact with cute girls. I've had similar approach anxiety with Night Game with a wingman but I quickly overcame it. I think what helped me before was someone to talk to and easing myself by making jokes. I try not to concern myself with the fact that I'm in a foreign country and think of the advantages but my mind goes back to compare how approachable and social Californian girls are(this stereotypical view is mostly from daygame videos, I wasn't even aware of game while I lived there) and I make last second stupid excuses when I get really close to a girl; like her smoking or her looking too young/old.

I'm not completely new to approaching, I've gotten rejected a couple times and realized how little of a thing it is to be scared of, and I've taken a girl to bed from my outer social circle. I don't even have a problem deep diving and connecting with a girl after I've done the actual approach but I have problems with going out alone and doing the approach itself. I hear people talking about grocery shops, bookstores and such, but can anyone guide me or give me tips/advice on doing street daygame direct approach alone?

 

[AsianPersuasion]

Haha, bro, I remember those days from last summer! Those fucking suck... Especially when you're starting out... I think it would benefit you, especially since you're working on getting good to stop your reliance on wingmen. In my experience, yeah, they give you a definite edge for when you're focused on getting the number close. These days it's so rare to see anyone out alone, especially if you're young (not sure if you are, just saying) so when you are out alone, people get the impression that you're a loner, so that works against you when you're trying to number close. The wingman eliminates this, and if you can get your hands on one, a sexy wing-girl gives you some great pre-selection.

But if you've got approach anxiety, I'd say that the girl's first impression of you is the least of your worries. You have to, HAVE TO get rid of that approach anxiety first and foremost. Kick that little demon that's preventing you from doing what you want into the dust it deserves to be in and don't stop until it's too scared to come back. While you're doing this, there won't always be a wingman around, and while you might get a bad first impression from it, big whoop. First impressions can change if you play your cards right.

Make it a rule to approach every single pretty girl you meet... They had to have spent at half an hour getting ready, and countless amounts of effort maintaining a decent looking body, so it'd be rude not to make their day and compliment them, right? Yeah, fuck it up if you have to.... Every time you fuck up, you're gonna learn something, and you're gonna get better... No matter how badly it goes, I can tell you straight up that I have never ever regretted approaching a girl, because the ones that end well give me a new person in my life, and the ones that end horribly both teach me a lesson and give me a funny story to tell...

As a matter of fact, if helps, don't even think about number closing. Think of it as a battle with your approach anxiety... It's your chance to tell that little fucker that it DOESN'T own you anymore. You'll feel the fear, and what sets you apart from pretty much everyone else in the whole place is that you'll still do what you want in the face of fear... Once you see the fear shrink away with it's tail between its legs faster and faster, believe me, you'll get addicted to the feeling and start approaching more and more just to see how much better you've gotten at fighting back fear... After that, fear is no more. You are free

Hope that helps man. Keep at it.

 

[Mr.Rob]

Asian P pretty much summed it up, it's your ego trying to keep you in a regular shitty life and you have to say "thank you Mr. Ego for the input but I'm going to have a badass life and be a badass". Then go approach the girl anyway. You're ego will be looking at you with it's mouth agape after you go chat her up.
Though I have to disagree on the part that going out alone to meet women making you come off as a loner.

I currently pretty much am a loner and I definitely never come across as one. Maybe yeah when I first started I stuck out like a sore thumb but these days the girls I approach would probably think it's weird that I don't have a social circle. So definitely don't let that creep up as a fear. Just make it so that you have an "excuse for being out alone". For example have a shopping bag in your hand from a shop if you're walking down a street with a bunch of shops. Just buy a little 3 dollar trinket and walla you have an excuse for being out alone.

Also if you're in a new country that's a perfect excuse right there to approach anybody! Hot women are usually in the know of cool places to go so ask her. "Hi there you're really cute and look like someone in the know. Any suggestions on a hip place to get a cup of coffee/alchoholic beverage? (her yeah blah blah go down there and take a right) Okay you seem pretty cool/in the know why don't you show me yourself I'm Lingua btw". This is also an excuse for why you're by yourself.

Don't let not having a wingman be an excuse not to approach. Something that also helps me is getting some social momentum going. If you go into mcdonalds for breakfast chat up the cashier. Ask her how her days going or if any weird customers have spat at her for getting their order wrong. Doesn't matter just talk about anything. If you're positive and sharing fun little banter with whomever you bump into then you'll feel better in general and more social so going getting rejected by a hot girl won't be as big a deal.

You don't have to jump head first into fear, in fact you should "lean into it". Start off small just go up to a hot girl and ask for the time or directions. Do that a couple times and then when that's easy ask for directions and then say "hey I'm not actually lost I just thought you were hot and couldn't think of any other way to start a conversation smoothly.. I'm Lingua" . Build up to the point where you're going direct.

Happy approaching!

-Rob

 

[lingua]

Thanks a lot guys, it really does help to get some feedback. Let's see how it goes, I'll be posting a report tomorrow, it's a matter of time until it's a LR

 

[Just_Dave]

Hey Lingua,

Like the others have mentioned already it's just something you have to get used too and overcome. It's all about consistent practice.
No wing men

Approach Anxiety can be conquered in many different ways:
Guest Post on It

Take things at your own pace and track your improvements.

Just Dave