Help on dealing with false rape accusation.

[CarterCarver]

Hello everybody!

Hope everyone's having a great year thus far. I was... up until a few hours ago when I got multiple phone calls from a few friends of mine, saying the girl I spent New Years Eve with (https://boards.girlschase.com/viewtopic.php?f=5&t=12658) is going around telling people I raped her! (If you don't want to read the LR, here is the gist of it: me and this girl, who completely consented and was not drunk, had sex in the back of my friend's van while another girl was passed out in the car. We did not do anything to the passed out girl, it was more exciting than anything. After, me and the girl I fucked laughed about it. She then went on to add me on instagram and snapchat, and send me a whole bunch of cleavage photos without me even asking)

I DID NOT DO THIS

I would never do such a thing, and really hate being accused of it. I read the article on how to deal with and avoid false rape accusations, but it says to talk to the girl in person. Sadly, I do not have my license and don't go to the same school as this girl. She knows a lot of people I know, and is telling them I raped her. There is no easy way for me to confront her in person. She's ignoring my texts as well as anyone who tries to ask her about New Years, and I'm certain that if I was to call she would not pick up.

Any and all advice is welcome. I was freaked out at first, but I've realized that there are snapchat records of her saying things like "I had a lot of fun with you on New Years" so I'm in the clear for the most part. I just don't want my reputation ruined.

-Carter

 

[Drck]

Obviously, save all the communication you have or had with her. Take screen shots of all the messages and times when she was texting you. Make copies just in case, don't just leave it on our phone. Get any other communication with her together if you can, get all the alcohol receipts and so on, and save it. Find out how much she was drinking. That's your #1 protection. If she texted you that she had a great time with you and then 2 days later she tells others that you raped her, she has no case...

Then go from there. If it is pretty clear that she had a good time with you (before she started accusing you), I wouldn't worry much about it. You might be even more aggressive, eg contact her, meet her face to face, and confront her directly. Do it in assertive but in non-aggressive way, simply ask for explanation. I would make sure that I have some reliable witnesses who can confirm what she says. Again, do not get mad or upset, try rather with friendly yet assertive attitude. Simply try "clean it up", walk away as a friend...

If it is not so clear, be more careful. Try to find out through those people who she told what is she planning to do, if anything. She may just be quacking her mouth around to save herself from slut shaming, you never know. But if she is more serious, don't take it lightly. At least do research on lawyers, have some numbers ready to call should something happen...

Should something happen and she even contact authorities, don't be a fool. Get a lawyer, a good one, spend the extra money, it might worth it, then do what he or she says...

I would not text her, remember, all the texts can be used as evidence - for your protection, but also against you...

 

[CarterCarver]

Drck-

Thank you so much for your response. It really helped me out. Due to my being 17 and not driving, I simply confronted her via text and we got things all straightened out.

She's now trying to "be my friend" and "meet up again".

She was fun to fuck, but I don't really want to meet up with her for obvious reasons. On the off chance that we do meet up, I'm going to make her sign a consent form before we do anything Hahahaha.

Thanks again!
-Carter

 

[Hector Papi Castillo]

Send me a PM with all the information you got. Everything. Imma help you through this, homie. Had a few friends deal with this and it's literally one of the worst things of all time. For right now, tell NO ONE and don't do ANYTHING. It's very important you handle this correctly from the get-go.

Hector

 

[Drck]

The problem is, if she is (was) already walking around and spreading lies about being raped, you don't necessary want to start fighting her or in any way become her 'enemy'. That would be like throwing gasoline in flames, it will not help you much. If there is any direct confrontation, guess who will the other people believe - the mean rapist or the poor sweet girl? You guessed right, she will be the victim, and you the rapist...

Thus more assertive or if you want more diplomatic solution is much better. You sort of become her friend at first so she drops all the nonsense, you smooth the situation over, and then you obviously cut all of the ties to her. You don't want to date her, you don't want to see her anymore, you don't want to party with her.... you also want to warn all of your friends about her because if she did it once there are chances she will do it in the future too...