PEOPLE
Me: 5'10" Asian Male in Finance, stylishly dressed, early 30s
Her: 5'7" Hispanic Girl, stylishly dressed, very long thin legs, early to mid 20s
BACKGROUND
I've been getting back into the swing of things recently. My new micro-goal is to be much more time/energy efficient about my Cold Approaches, i.e. instead of making a big thing of it every weekend afternoon, I just head out for groceries or quick dinner after work on weekdays and get in some quick Cold Approaches. This ends up being much faster, and also less socially draining for me.
THE MEET
After work, I went to the Krogers for some groceries, and decided to Cold Approach a few girls while I was there. Made 2-3 nice approaches while shopping, but nothing stuck. I decided to head home, and as I was walking home (around 9PM, well after dark), I saw the back of a girl wearing tight leggings. Her legs were **very** long and skinny, which is my ideal type.
I walked closer to her, and instinctively realized this was going to be a harder approach since it was night time, and people are generally more on guard. My experience led me to intuitively modify my approach in two ways:
1) Wait until she passes from this area of relative darkness, to an area of relative lightness underneath the street light
2) Wait until the current cars pass, and the next set of cars are stuck behind the traffic light, so there's less noise pollution and she's less likely to mis-hear my initial approach.
I waited a few moments pacing behind her until 1 and 2 intersected perfectly, then walked next to her, turned slightly towards her, began checking her out (which caused her to look at me), and then I said "Your outfit is quite stylish". She responded warmly with thanks, and complimented me back on my outfit as well. We continued bantering and chitchatting for a bit. She was contributing well to the conversation, giving me tips(wear some pink) on how to "make the girls go crazy for me". I countered that I think the gay guys would go crazy for me then. We also laughed a bit about how men hit on both of us occasionally.
THE CLOSE
After a few streets of walking, I asked "hey, want to trade numbers, maybe get a coffee sometime?". She smiled and said sure. We chatted a bit more, and parted. Her final remark as she walked away was "don't get hit on by anyone tonight".
FOLLOWUP
I texted her it was wonderful to have met, and asked her schedule on when to get a coffee. She was a bit dodgy and flaky over text, but I just continued casually keeping the conversation open and pinging her for availability. Eventually she agreed to meet for coffee on a weekend afternoon when she'll already be in the area shopping.
FIRST DATE
We were supposed to meet at a coffee place at 12:30, but she texted me a little while before "sorry running a bit late, can we meet at a later time?". This threw me off a bit, because usually girls will say "I'm going to be 20 minutes late". I wasn't sure how much later she wanted to meet. I replied it's fine, let's meet at 1:30? She said sure, and we met then. She showed up very stylishly dressed. High heeled brown boots, sheer black leggings, a plaid skirt, a top that revealed her shoulders, along with a beige trench coat, I was impressed. We got coffee, I paid, and sat and chatted for awhile.
Conversation was alright, not amazing. The point we connected most about was how she doesn't have a regular 9-5 job, she's some sort of social media influencer (apparently something to do with her stunning legs?), and I wanted to leave my 9-5 for my own business of some sort.
BOUNCE
I could tell our connection wasn't nearly good enough at this point. So I figured a few bounces would help. I suggested we go to the nearby department store since she was looking for a sweater there anyway. She didn't find what she wanted, so I suggested we go to the mall nearby my place where she might find what she wants, and she agreed and we took the bus there. Then we got food in the mall, then we looked at some dishes/cutlery nearby.
PULL
It was getting a bit late by this point. I offered her a drink of whiskey at my place before she heads home. She initially was cagey about it, but eventually agreed, "just for 10 minutes". She expressed fear that I might "abduct her". I joked about it and kept it as non-chalant as possible to keep her at ease.
ESCALATION
After drinking/chatting for some 20-30 minutes, I went for a kiss, which was pretty awkward. Less so that I didn't do it right, more so that she's pretty inexperienced with kissing. But she subsequently put her legs on top of mine, and we went through the standard physical escalation stuff.
This physical escalation lasted probably 2 hours. I could tell she was pretty new to sex, and she was basically taking this huge long amount of time to turn herself on, and convince herself she wanted this. The whole time I had this attitude of "I could take it or leave it--I'm just enjoying myself right now". She eventually asked me if I had a condom, and we did it.
AFTER SEX
She hung around a bit, and asked me about her performance. I could tell she was pretty self-conscious about the whole thing. I gave her some minor tips, but ultimately said I had a great time, called her an Uber, and we said our goodbyes.
KEYS TO THE LAY
- Multiple bounces. My calibration was fairly good to read that she wasn't ready for a bounce right after coffee. This was confirmed because she was hesitant to go to my place even after multiple bounces, so she definitely would have refused right after coffee.
- Being non-chalant, and not pushy in escalation. She often said things like "we shouldn't do this, we just met", and I would respond with "You're right, we definitely shouldn't do anything (with a smile)". I basically let her convince herself she wanted this.
- Being patient. I know a lot of the articles say to "move faster", etc. But in this case, with a relatively inexperienced girl, I really needed to empathize with her inexperience and nervousness, and let her know we can move at her pace all throughout the interaction. When she was back at my place, I could literally see her mind going at 100x speed thinking through by herself what sex would mean for her, and ultimately convincing herself.
LESSONS/STICKING POINTS
- Mainly this was the first time I pulled off a street approach in the dark of night lay.
- This was also perhaps the 3rd or 4th time that a very sexually inexperienced girl(maybe virgin) decided to become intimate quickly with me (someone she perceives as very experienced). It's counterintuitive but I kind of understand it. She's really nervous about the whole thing, and wants someone who:
- she doesn't particularly care about
- won't judge her
- is going to be chill and experienced, and not add to her own anxiety/stress, and ensure that one of her early sexual experiences won't be a disaster
- won't become clingy to her afterwards
Sometimes these days I feel like I'm providing a service to these girls--swooping into their lives literally off the street to perform therapy to help them resolve past sexual traumas and to give them a safe place to gain some sexual experience.
Me: 5'10" Asian Male in Finance, stylishly dressed, early 30s
Her: 5'7" Hispanic Girl, stylishly dressed, very long thin legs, early to mid 20s
BACKGROUND
I've been getting back into the swing of things recently. My new micro-goal is to be much more time/energy efficient about my Cold Approaches, i.e. instead of making a big thing of it every weekend afternoon, I just head out for groceries or quick dinner after work on weekdays and get in some quick Cold Approaches. This ends up being much faster, and also less socially draining for me.
THE MEET
After work, I went to the Krogers for some groceries, and decided to Cold Approach a few girls while I was there. Made 2-3 nice approaches while shopping, but nothing stuck. I decided to head home, and as I was walking home (around 9PM, well after dark), I saw the back of a girl wearing tight leggings. Her legs were **very** long and skinny, which is my ideal type.
I walked closer to her, and instinctively realized this was going to be a harder approach since it was night time, and people are generally more on guard. My experience led me to intuitively modify my approach in two ways:
1) Wait until she passes from this area of relative darkness, to an area of relative lightness underneath the street light
2) Wait until the current cars pass, and the next set of cars are stuck behind the traffic light, so there's less noise pollution and she's less likely to mis-hear my initial approach.
I waited a few moments pacing behind her until 1 and 2 intersected perfectly, then walked next to her, turned slightly towards her, began checking her out (which caused her to look at me), and then I said "Your outfit is quite stylish". She responded warmly with thanks, and complimented me back on my outfit as well. We continued bantering and chitchatting for a bit. She was contributing well to the conversation, giving me tips(wear some pink) on how to "make the girls go crazy for me". I countered that I think the gay guys would go crazy for me then. We also laughed a bit about how men hit on both of us occasionally.
THE CLOSE
After a few streets of walking, I asked "hey, want to trade numbers, maybe get a coffee sometime?". She smiled and said sure. We chatted a bit more, and parted. Her final remark as she walked away was "don't get hit on by anyone tonight".
FOLLOWUP
I texted her it was wonderful to have met, and asked her schedule on when to get a coffee. She was a bit dodgy and flaky over text, but I just continued casually keeping the conversation open and pinging her for availability. Eventually she agreed to meet for coffee on a weekend afternoon when she'll already be in the area shopping.
FIRST DATE
We were supposed to meet at a coffee place at 12:30, but she texted me a little while before "sorry running a bit late, can we meet at a later time?". This threw me off a bit, because usually girls will say "I'm going to be 20 minutes late". I wasn't sure how much later she wanted to meet. I replied it's fine, let's meet at 1:30? She said sure, and we met then. She showed up very stylishly dressed. High heeled brown boots, sheer black leggings, a plaid skirt, a top that revealed her shoulders, along with a beige trench coat, I was impressed. We got coffee, I paid, and sat and chatted for awhile.
Conversation was alright, not amazing. The point we connected most about was how she doesn't have a regular 9-5 job, she's some sort of social media influencer (apparently something to do with her stunning legs?), and I wanted to leave my 9-5 for my own business of some sort.
BOUNCE
I could tell our connection wasn't nearly good enough at this point. So I figured a few bounces would help. I suggested we go to the nearby department store since she was looking for a sweater there anyway. She didn't find what she wanted, so I suggested we go to the mall nearby my place where she might find what she wants, and she agreed and we took the bus there. Then we got food in the mall, then we looked at some dishes/cutlery nearby.
PULL
It was getting a bit late by this point. I offered her a drink of whiskey at my place before she heads home. She initially was cagey about it, but eventually agreed, "just for 10 minutes". She expressed fear that I might "abduct her". I joked about it and kept it as non-chalant as possible to keep her at ease.
ESCALATION
After drinking/chatting for some 20-30 minutes, I went for a kiss, which was pretty awkward. Less so that I didn't do it right, more so that she's pretty inexperienced with kissing. But she subsequently put her legs on top of mine, and we went through the standard physical escalation stuff.
This physical escalation lasted probably 2 hours. I could tell she was pretty new to sex, and she was basically taking this huge long amount of time to turn herself on, and convince herself she wanted this. The whole time I had this attitude of "I could take it or leave it--I'm just enjoying myself right now". She eventually asked me if I had a condom, and we did it.
AFTER SEX
She hung around a bit, and asked me about her performance. I could tell she was pretty self-conscious about the whole thing. I gave her some minor tips, but ultimately said I had a great time, called her an Uber, and we said our goodbyes.
KEYS TO THE LAY
- Multiple bounces. My calibration was fairly good to read that she wasn't ready for a bounce right after coffee. This was confirmed because she was hesitant to go to my place even after multiple bounces, so she definitely would have refused right after coffee.
- Being non-chalant, and not pushy in escalation. She often said things like "we shouldn't do this, we just met", and I would respond with "You're right, we definitely shouldn't do anything (with a smile)". I basically let her convince herself she wanted this.
- Being patient. I know a lot of the articles say to "move faster", etc. But in this case, with a relatively inexperienced girl, I really needed to empathize with her inexperience and nervousness, and let her know we can move at her pace all throughout the interaction. When she was back at my place, I could literally see her mind going at 100x speed thinking through by herself what sex would mean for her, and ultimately convincing herself.
LESSONS/STICKING POINTS
- Mainly this was the first time I pulled off a street approach in the dark of night lay.
- This was also perhaps the 3rd or 4th time that a very sexually inexperienced girl(maybe virgin) decided to become intimate quickly with me (someone she perceives as very experienced). It's counterintuitive but I kind of understand it. She's really nervous about the whole thing, and wants someone who:
- she doesn't particularly care about
- won't judge her
- is going to be chill and experienced, and not add to her own anxiety/stress, and ensure that one of her early sexual experiences won't be a disaster
- won't become clingy to her afterwards
Sometimes these days I feel like I'm providing a service to these girls--swooping into their lives literally off the street to perform therapy to help them resolve past sexual traumas and to give them a safe place to gain some sexual experience.
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