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FR  Hookup Turned Into a Date

Bboy100

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Jan 2, 2015
Messages
1,107
I had a peculiar interaction with a girl off Tinder yesterday/today. It started out being a plan for us to just hookup, then the next day, she wasn't down for that and instead, she seems like she wants some sort of date. Here's how it went:

[On Tinder]
Her: On a scale from 1 to 10. Your'e a 9. I'm the one you need [Kissy face emoji]
Me: [A giphy of kramer from Seinfeld saying "that's true]
Us: a progression of more and more sexual gifhys. Eventually, the last one was of her sending a giphy of a girl in a bed and in lingerie saying giving me the "come here" motion with her finger.
Me: Come over?
Her: Um. I'm a little busy right now [Winky face]
Me: When are you free?
Her: Hmm. Maybe tonight
Me: Yeah, works for me. What time?
Her: I'm not sure
Me: Ok, let me know when you figure it out?
Her: kk
[ 8ish hours later]
Me: Will you still be able to make it tonight?
Her: Where you be?
Me: I'm in [name of my city]. I can also come to you. Either way works for me.
Her: Wow okay. Tempting
Me: Is something holding you back?
Her: The fact that I have to be up at 4 am. That's about it.
Me: Eww, that sucks. :/ I mean, if it gets too late, just let me know an dI'll leave. I'd totally understand.
Her: can we just meet up tomorrow? Is that cool?
Me: At what time?
Us: Some logistical texts planning to meet the next day.

[The next day]

Me: So, I'm free all day today (I wasn't sure if I would be free and I told her I'd let her know the next day). Let me know if your'e still down to hang out :)
Her: I had some stuff come up today. I'm so sorry! Cna we hang out tomorrow? For sure?
Me: yeah, tomorrow is fine!
Her: Hey, do you Snapchat? Or nah?
Me: Yeah, its [My snapchat]

Over snapchat, we sent a few exchanges. Some of them were somewhat sexual. For example, she sent me a video of her singing along with a song in which part of the lyrics were "I want you". And as she sang that, she winked at me I replied by sending her a picture of a book titled "the Philosophy of Erotic Love". It has a picture of two greek guys having sex on it. My caption was "Well, since you asked me through a song...who am I to say no?

Eventually, I ended the Snapchat convo under the pretense that "I had to go to work". Truthfully, I just didn't feel like spending hours snapping someone I didn't know. lol

Here's where it gets weird...

A few hours later she texts me:
Her: Hey what did you want to do tomorrow?
Me: I'm down to hang out at your place or you can come over. Either works for me.
Her: I have a proposal for you
Me: Go for it
Her: Would you like to join the nerf gun war that my friends are having tomorrow. I have a gun you can borrow [winky face]
Me: That sounds like fun but tbh, I'd rather it just be me and you for now. Maybe I can meet your friends some other time :) Its just cause I haven't even met you yet haha
Her: Well what is chill mean to you? <---I actually never used the word "chill"
Me: What do you mean?
Her: Like, what's your definition of chill? <----At this point, it seems she's changed her mind about straight up hooking up with me. I'm left pretty confused.
Me: Hang out, talk, get to know each other etc. I just feel like 1 on 1 is a little different than a group activity <--At this point, I had no choice but to accept her frame. Otherwise its likely I would have lost her.
Her: This is true. I agree.
Me: But if you're hesitant for some reason, I'd love to hear it :)
Her: Well on tinder most guys definition of chill is having sex
Me: Ill be 100% honest with you. I have nothing against hook ups and have been in my fair share of them. But by no means do I go out looking for them. And I certainly don't expect that from you. My plan for tomorrow is to get to know you and see if we click. Anything more is just a bonus :)
Her: Okay :) Thank you for being honest :)
Me: Yeah, np. I'll see you tomorrow?
Her: Of course!

I don't know about you guys, but to me it seemed that the previous day, she was dtf. The only reason we couldn 't meet is because she had to wake up at 4 am and it was already pretty late. Whereas now, she's acting like we never had that conversation and she's heavily implying that she's not looking to hook up with me (yet).

My best guess would be that because of our conversations and snaps, she started to see me as an actually valuable guy as opposed to just a walking penis she can use. Which is why she decided to put the brakes on us getting together. Or she was in that part of her menstrual cycle where she's looking to hook up yesterday. And now she's passed that. So the window may have closed.

Do you guys have any thoughts on all this?
 
the right date makes getting her back home a piece of cake

Fuck This

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Jul 24, 2015
Messages
2,091
Classic bait and switch.

Plus she sounds young. Young girls don't know what they want and are more likely to want the attention that sexy texts gets them.

If you can do a cheap picnic near your place, you can satisfy her desire for a date, and escalate for a rendezvous.
 

Bboy100

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Jan 2, 2015
Messages
1,107
Update: Just sealed the deal. Either she changed her mind again, or it was just a shit test. Cause I just met her at her place and we were having sex 15 minutes later
 

Seppuku

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Aug 25, 2014
Messages
1,149
Very interesting interaction!

The way I view it she was into you from the first but she threw a few tests first and you passed them.


Bboy100 said:
Me: When are you free?
Her: Hmm. Maybe tonight [here she baits you]
Me: Yeah, works for me. What time?
Her: I'm not sure
[...]
Her: can we just meet up tomorrow? Is that cool? [more baiting. She made you wait all day, and now tells you tomorrow]

But now here is the real deal:

Her: Would you like to join the nerf gun war that my friends are having tomorrow. I have a gun you can borrow [winky face]

Now she frames the whole thing as a friend zone date, to test the strength of your frame. But you successfully reject it. Test passed:

Me: That sounds like fun but tbh, I'd rather it just be me and you for now. Maybe I can meet your friends some other time :) Its just cause I haven't even met you yet haha

Next test now. "All guys want sex!" If you bow and say "Not me" you're done.


Her: Like, what's your definition of chill? <----At this point, it seems she's changed her mind about straight up hooking up with me. I'm left pretty confused.
Me: Hang out, talk, get to know each other etc. I just feel like 1 on 1 is a little different than a group activity <--At this point, I had no choice but to accept her frame. Otherwise its likely I would have lost her.
Her: This is true. I agree.
Me: But if you're hesitant for some reason, I'd love to hear it :)
Her: Well on tinder most guys definition of chill is having sex
Me: Ill be 100% honest with you. I have nothing against hook ups and have been in my fair share of them. But by no means do I go out looking for them. And I certainly don't expect that from you. My plan for tomorrow is to get to know you and see if we click. Anything more is just a bonus :)

You were strong enough. Test passed. Now she's really on.

Her: Okay :) Thank you for being honest :)
Me: Yeah, np. I'll see you tomorrow?
Her: Of course!

Tests passed... the next day she comes directly to fuck you. She was perfectly OK with a first date sex... As long as it's with a strong man that passes her tests, namely:
* He knows what he wants
* He has no shame to admit what he wants

Good job!

Cheers,
Seppuku
 
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