Hot girls, cool friends, and the party lifestyle as an adult: Are my goals unrea

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

I posted a while ago about how even though I was doing a lot better with women, dating, and girls these days; a part of me felt empty on the inside. Looking back it, I realized that I was angry, aimless, and depressed because I missed out on the social life in my younger and formative years. I was not in a fraternity in my college days and went to a school where being in a fraternity was a big deal. Whatever might have happened or whatever I could have done, I missed out.

After taking some time off, I decided that I would put time in for the rest of my 20s and even my 30s to get a lot of what I was denied in college. I thought about it and realized that a part of what makes so much of what I want realistic in college is that, well, you're in the college atmosphere where so many people are in the 18-21 year old age range and in that mindset of wanting to party. Friends are a walk away, people don't have jobs, no real responsibilities, and a lot of free time.

So this is what I want:

1. Social experiences with good looking girls, both inside and outside of the bed room.

I want to work on being the guy that arrives at a bar with two hot girls, goes to an event with two hot girls, and eventually builds this social circle that has hot girls in it. In the long run, I want to work on building a life involving cute girls to where if me and my friends (which I will get to later) throw a party on New Year's Eve or Halloween, we can have hot girls over.

2. Cool guy friends that love partying and are good with girls.

The kinds of guy friends that are good at partying, pulling girls, and also have good looking girls in their social circles.

3. The parties and the party lifestyle.

Amazing parties that involve hot girls, alcohol, and a lot of fun.

4. The validation lifestyle.

I want to be that douche who puts up pics of himself on Instagram with hot girls and doing fun things. Speaking of, I am working on reaching 1k followers.

If I had to sum it up: I want to somewhat live like a frat boy after college.

That doesn't mean getting wasted 24/7 and on weekdays, it means partying once every month or two (ya, like a softcore version of Greek Life). Maybe once or twice a year, he goes to this amazing fun filled party with hot girls and a ton of fun things going on.

Am I just being unrealistic at this point?

 

[Marcellus]

Re: Hot girls, cool friends, and the party lifestyle as an adult: Are my goals u

So you want to be Dan Bilzerian?

 

[Improvementalist]

Re: Hot girls, cool friends, and the party lifestyle as an adult: Are my goals u

If you really, really want to try and do it:

https://boards.girlschase.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=4671&p=21554#p21553

Keep us posted of how it turns out!

 

[Hector Papi Castillo]

Re: Hot girls, cool friends, and the party lifestyle as an adult: Are my goals u

Yep, very unrealistic.

Hector

 

[Paulie Walnuts]

Re: Hot girls, cool friends, and the party lifestyle as an adult: Are my goals u

Yeah it's totally still possible, I know quite a few older guys from the EDM scene here in my town that are exactly what you describe; ranging from about 28-35ish. Girls love em because they have their own places and lives straight and all that jazz, I'm sure there's a big group like that in your town too you just need to find them.

The older guys that were part of the EDM scene here went to raves/clubs and befriended the guys who already had strong social circles (the good looking/party guys and hot girls you're talking about), it's really not that complex you just need to find which group it is, target them specifically and then work your way in slowly.

Easy way is to throw an after party after an event or something like that, make a few friends there (that you know are part of "The Group"), then invite em all back for an after party.

There's other ways too, but I know a fair amount of guys in that age range who are still living the frat guy life you're looking for or whatever.

I highly recommend you don't seek this for validation though, it's a bad path to go down (I'd know since I did that myself), I highly advise you to take Chase, Hector and the other higher ranking members advice on stuff like this, they know what they're talking about.

I'm about a million times happier now that I've stopped seeking validation (as much, still working on it).

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Re: Hot girls, cool friends, and the party lifestyle as an adult: Are my goals u

Having been the kind of college guy he hated (in a top fraternity and having all of that) and read the threads, I finally figured out what OP really wants, whether it is attainable is not something I can talk about since I am not an adult in the working world. I thought about what made my college experience so special, especially since I rushed a fraternity, is this feeling of a close knit community consisting of a lot of people.

What you have is you, your close friends (fraternity brothers), girls very familiar with your close friends (sorority sisters), and a bunch of events and parties you can have with that close knit community (date nights, formals, mixers, etc.). I feel like there is some sense of validation to be found in being a part of that kind of a large crowd, talking about what girls you fucked/hooked up with, hearing from your bros what girls are interested in you, and occasionally going to fun events with that kind of a crowd which you have grown so accustomed to meeting with and seeing.

Deep down, I think that is what guys like OP really want, that sense of community and belonging to a large group of people which consist of fun guys and hot girls.

 

[Paulie Walnuts]

Re: Hot girls, cool friends, and the party lifestyle as an adult: Are my goals u

I doubt it's possible to recreate the exact college fraternity experience (that's why at 23 and being a Junior next year I'll still be rushing , I want to do the whole Greek Life thing, regardless of being a little older than the rest of the guys).

As for someone who's already an actual adult though... the closest thing to do would be to simply build up a powerful social circle from scratch, hot girls + cool guys, but yeah the exact Frat guy thing as someone in their late 20's or 30's wouldn't really be possible.

You... could go to college parties and build a social circle from there? It would be a little odd though, that's not somewhere I typically see people OP's age; and even then it's not EXACTLY the same thing.

OP you gotta either do the next best thing (powerful social circle) or move on from this, or you'll always be feeling like you missed out.

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Re: Hot girls, cool friends, and the party lifestyle as an adult: Are my goals u

As a guy in a good house, it is just odd to us when an older guy tries to be a part of our crowd, we usually dismiss people like that. Come to think of it, most good houses hardly bid anyone past freshman year (exceptions do exist btw) because their pledge classes are loaded. Most good frats are very exclusive and not welcoming at all. We have the alcohol, we are well funded, hot sororities love us, and we can afford to do a lot of fun things. Why should we ever have to resort to letting some random older guy be a part of our crowd?

We always run across the type too, missed out on the college experience and now he tries to be with the "cool kids". Most of the times, girls use guys like that for drinks and the guys just laugh as the girls make a fool out of the poor dude. Please, do not be one of these guys, there is nothing amazing about an older guy that wants to hang with the college guys. Find out where the post grad scene is and try to be a part of that. I think that is where we need to focus if we are going to help OP, on the post grad party scene.

All that being said, I am sure that there is something out there for guys like OP. I've heard of post grad neighborhoods and apartments made specifically for post grads where things like pool parties and other social events are the norm. Perhaps OP can find a side job in the service industry, lots of bartenders and people like them tend to be good with women. I've read about gentleman type clubs like Studio 54 of NYC in books, maybe if OP becomes successful he can be a part of those clubs.

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Re: Hot girls, cool friends, and the party lifestyle as an adult: Are my goals u

One thing I recommend looking into which hasn't been brought up yet are post grad apartments and neighborhoods. The pool parties happen and the sense of community that existed in college is still there. Sure people work and stuff but they still go out together and are relatively friendly compared to the typical apartments full of older people.

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Re: Hot girls, cool friends, and the party lifestyle as an adult: Are my goals u

Ya I do not want to duplicate the frat experience in every sense of the word.

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Re: Hot girls, cool friends, and the party lifestyle as an adult: Are my goals u

BTW, anyone have any advice on how I can get about 500+ followers on Instagram by the end of this year? Better yet, how to meet that many people that will want to follow me?