How do you screen and polarise during daygame?

[jdoc]

One of my biggest frustrations in seduction is going on dates with girls who are simply not interested in me, but agree to go on a date for whatever reason. The typical approach involves opening a girl with a genuine compliment, followed up with repartee, deep-diving and number swapping.

Yesterday I went on a date with a gal, only to find that she had darting eyes, recoiled at my lightest touch, moved away as I leaned in (even if subtly), and looked at her phone multiple times. It was clear she wasn't interested in me. Less than an hour in she said that she had to go meet a friend. In the end, it was a waste of time and money for both of us. The date was doomed from the get-go.

I need to screen girls, and polarise my own personality more. That way the girls I go out with are actually attracted to me, and I don't waste my time with fruitless dates.

What are a couple of things that you guys do to screen and polarise? I feel like my direct approaches are too "safe", and I'm getting girls out because they think I'm nice/cool but are not sexually attracted to me. Interested to hear what you guys think.

- Jeff

 

[Sophisticated Gent]

jdoc,

This has me wondering if it is your screening and polarizing or what happens on the dates? More details on the date would help. If this happens regularly which you indicate I am leaning towards the date or a combination of both. Do some field reports that we can evaluate. Include both the approach and the date. We need conversations to evaluate.

Regarding polarizing it is best to use a comment mildly sexually suggestive that fits the moment. This takes practice and awareness. Just do it and you will learn what works. If it lights her up then you know she is interested in sex. The one thing that is difficult to judge is if the comment is to sexual. If so it may turn her off even if she is into you. That is why all of the stuff takes work and practice.

Sometimes we don't know the girls motive for going on the date which can cause this. Once in college I went on a date and figured out during the date that she was using me to try to make another guy pay attention to her. So occasionally you may be getting used but this doesn't happen often.

I am assuming that you are keeping your fundamentals high on the date. If they are high during the approach and then you drop off on the date you can get auto rejected.

BDSC

 

[Zoro]

I agree with bigdaddysc,

We need to hear more details.

I have a suspicion that it's not what you are doing but how you are doing it. You've got the moves down on paper, but are you pulling them off from an attractive frame?

Are you leading her emotions or just running tactics?

Are you skeptically curious or sold on the spot?

 

[PrettyDecent]

Fellas,

Actually, jdoc does have a few field reports on the boards that you can use to evaluate.

Jeff - you remember I showed you that thread from Chase that talked about polarizing and had examples of different ways you could do it? Literally just go down that list and try each one of those. We'll go out for a couple rounds of nightgame and you can trial each one - once you have those down, it'll be a natural extension into your daygame.

~Nick

 

[Drck]

Also, I see some problem with congruence. You approach her, have some chat, she gives you her number, she is obviously interested...

You call her and setup a date, she goes as she is interested.

She shows up (still interested) but shortly after that she is losing her interest. Why is that? My impression is that it is because now you are acting differently than what she perceived originally...

--------------

Here is what happens many times: An inexperienced guy starts reading seduction. He learns everything about being sexy - he starts walking sexy, talking sexy, looking sexy, giving sexy gazes and so fort. The same with confidence, he looks overconfident, takes too much space, looks dominant and so forth. So the girl gets excited, she sees a sexy, confident and dominant guy and she agrees for a date.

However, shortly after that she recognizes that that is not really the case. Now as she listens more and observes more body language, she can see through the initial impression. She sees that the guy is trying quite hard to appear more experienced than he really is, so she starts loosing interest very fast...

Don't underestimate girls, they are very smart in this area, 10x smarter than you. Most can read you very well, many times they know the truth (the real you) much faster than you are even willing to accept...

 

[Lawliet]

Eh what's polarising ?

 

[jdoc]

Hey fellas,

I met this particular girl on campus and opened her with genuine compliment, and some small talk followed. There were no sparks flying around, but that said, she didn't appear disinterested either. At one point I stepped forwards slightly because the distance between us was too big, but she took a step back when I did so. She was on exchange from Brazil, so I deep dove her a little about that. At the end, we had forgotten each other names, and she we reintroduced - I held her hand and squeezed it a little before asking for her number. To be honest, I wasn't sure that it was even a solid number. The conversation was pleasant, but that was all it was... pleasant... at best.

On the day of meeting her, she had arrived 10 minutes early, and I arrived 7 minutes late (maybe that might've sent her into autoreject?).

She was sitting down outside the pub on the outdoor bench when I walked up to her. She didn't seem even the slightest bit excited to see me, and she took her time to stand up. I kind of assumed she had a terrible day. As far as I'm concerned, I think my fundamentals were pretty good that day - style, grooming, voice tone, posture... all good. Plus, I had amassed pretty large amount of social momentum during the day and I was feeling pretty good about myself. I don't really think that my vibe was different compared to when I had approached her.

Ever since I said hello, she had been acting pretty cold... within the first 10 seconds of meeting. I think she was having a bad day, and I should've said something along the lines of, 'hey, if everything okay? You seem a little different than usual' so shake her out of auto-pilot. I didn't do that, and I ended up carrying at my game as per norm, but it went nowhere.

I'm thinking that she was perhaps having a bad day, or that she just wasn't that into me. Maybe a combination of both.

Here's Chase's post on polarising: https://boards.girlschase.com/viewtopic.php?t=10206&p=50100