How do you use your periphs when walking towards someone?

[TheWiseFool]

Does anyone know how to efficiently check women out through their peripheral vision, especially when you are walking down the street? I remember today I was walking down the sidewalk and their were groups of girls walking towards me but I didn't want to come off as scanning, so I just kept walking forward without actually getting a chance to see if any were looking at me or not. Using your periphs when you are not moving is easy. Am I suppose to check them out at a certain distance in order to follow pre-opening? I read somewhere that you look just above people's heads when walking. I tried that but it didn't help too much, which may mean that I need to work on my peripheral vision more or learn some other method.

- TWF

 

[Marty]

I used to struggle with this forever until I realized I was overthinking it.

Now, I do as follows. You can see a good 200 feet off that a girl is potentially cute—body shape and walk usually gives it away. I find that's all I need to know for the time being... as she gets closer, I refrain from the fawning and gazing to determine "Is she really cute? Is she cute enough? Do I want to meet her enough to offset my cowardice?" and all that nonsense; instead, I walk on, not making eye contact but looking up with an enigmatic smile on my face. That's often enough to get her to meet my eye first, and when she does, I look back hard and make a split-second decision whether to approach. That's actually good because it makes it more spontaneous. I still miss a few though, but the ones I do get give me better receptions.

If she doesn't meet my eye, I can usually risk a quick glance and get away with it, without her noticing, then open by getting her attention first, but still coming off of the split-second decision.

I'm not really very good at this, but I like this topic so I've subscribed to keep up; take my words with a pinch of salt and let's see who else wants to contribute!

 

[TheWiseFool]

Thanks for the reply Marty

Sometimes girls will wait til THE VERY LAST SECOND to glance over at me, by then I've passed by.

I'm assuming it is best to do something like this:
*Girl passes by you*
*Wait two seconds before turning around. Run up to her*
"Hey, I didn't want to let you pass by me and miss the opportunity to get to know you. I'm ..."
...

I still need to test this on top of approaching, but I'm definitely interested in getting feedback from the community.

Thanks,

TWF

 

[Marty]

Run??

Did you read any of Chase's stuff about slow movement speed? Take a look.

 

[Knightrain]

Sometimes girls will wait til THE VERY LAST SECOND to glance over at me, by then I've passed by.

I'm assuming it is best to do something like this:
*Girl passes by you*
*Wait two seconds before turning around. Run up to her*

I'm not too good at this stuff yet, but I'm pretty sure you're not suppose to chase girls, literally or otherwise. -500 Sprezzatura Points

Chase did say that letting her pass and then catching up is the best way to open girls that are walking in an opposite direction, so you should just turn around and walk just fast enough to catch up to her. I believe Ricardus said that just saying "Stop" and holding out your hand works too. Ricardus's way sounds far more badass.




I usually only notice glances when it's too late. When I do notice them looking at me, half of me thinks its because they think I'm weird....sometimes these girls end up opening me and I get their #s but other times I open and they don't seem interested... and all this is with using my full vision. When only using my peripherals I just get a "feeling" that a girl is looking at me. Do I just need more practice?

 

[PrettyDecent]

I used to struggle with this forever until I realized I was overthinking it.

Marty, that's a smart observation. And the advice you gave is exactly what I do, too.

TWF, glances from a girl really don't matter. As you get more experienced approaching, you find out which girls will be receptive to the approach, and whether they notice you beforehand or not is irrelevant.

I read somewhere that you look just above people's heads when walking.

Hmm...nah. It's bad posture if nothing else, but you're also implicitly communicating that you're "better than everybody else". It's better to see what girls look cute from afar, and then approach them right after they pass you.

~Nick

 

[Ryan]

Going off a bit of a tangent here (but still keeping within the theme of this thread); once a girl passes you by on the street, is it game over? I've always thought it's a bad idea to turn around and especially approach a girl from behind whenever I try to approach a girl.

 

[Richard]

Ryan,

once a girl passes you by on the street, is it game over?

NOT GAME OVER AT ALL! When she walks past you, catch her eye, then smile, wait a few seconds and jog up a bit to catch her, pre-open her by touching her elbow Then proceed from there, I do it all the time!

Now, on to using your peripherals.

Okay, with your peripherals and your head forward, you can look about and define most objects within a 120-150 degree vision. Anything out of that range is fuzzy, so if you can keep your head straight mostly, and turn your head very slightly then you can easily look within a 180 degree field of vision.

Another thing I personally do is "catch colors," or "catch shapes" like bright colors or hair stands out for me, and I can easily discern between men and women in my peripherals. But that's how you do it, turn your head very slightly left or right to allow yourself that 180 degree+ field of vision, and clarity

 

[Marty]

Ryan, read again what Knightrain wrote:

Chase did say that letting her pass and then catching up is the best way to open girls that are walking in an opposite direction, so you should just turn around and walk just fast enough to catch up to her. I believe Ricardus said that just saying "Stop" and holding out your hand works too. Ricardus's way sounds far more badass.

I can confirm that the first one gets good results, especially if you say something like "I just saw you pass by, and I simply had to come back and say hello..." and then go direct: "...you're very cute! What's your name?"

If she looked at you or (gasp!) smiled at you, you can of course make reference to that in a calibrated way. "I noticed you have a cute smile" or "you have lovely eyes" or even "If you're going to smile at me like that, you should at least say hello!" (credit to Zphix I think...)

As for the second, I cannot bring myself (yet) to be quite as badass as Ricardus (!), but I have stopped girls with phrases like "D'you mind stopping for a second?" and then open as normal.

-Marty

 

[TheWiseFool]

Thanks for the feedback guys really appreciate it.

I did find the answer and it definitely is what Ricardus suggested. Just stop her and state your case, rather than beating around the bush. It seems to be that the simplest and most logical choice is the best option IF you carry yourself in a calm and controlled manner, no gimmicks. We have a tendency to do something else rather than listening to instinct (I know you need to develop instinct, but there is still years upon years of instinct crammed into our DNA somewhere) because our egos are telling us "no don't, that's stupid, you'll embarrass yourself". Then I thought, alright... since I'm being a pussy and not approaching them, how would I want a situation to carry out if a woman was the one who approached me and lead the interaction because she isn't the usual type of woman who waits for men to approach her? And then I figured it out.

Again, thanks guys
- TWF

 

[TheWiseFool]

Also, Happy Birthday Marty!

Have a good one man.
-TWF