How how to stop focusing on looks?

[NaturallySmooth]

Whenever I approach girls I cannot help stop thinking about my own looks. I'm above average looking and I definitely have above average game and genuinely do like to get to know most girls so I definitely have decent success.

The problem is that I am always comparing myself to other guys when I'm out and if I see too many 'better looking' guys out I can get intimidated and not as enthusiastic about approaching. This KILLS my nights sometimes and I don't know what to do. Especially with really hot girls this can be a problem

Please help me out guys

 

[Desert Eagle]

A comparable mind-process that I use to manage feelings of 'not good enough' is to realize that you absolutely cannot change it right now. Remind yourself to live in the present.

Another thing that I think needs changing is the looks priority. A girl is always going to hold a guy who can approach and do it well in much brighter light than guys sitting around not approaching women. Right now, all you can do to improve your position is to approach women - so go for it!

 

[Pato]

I think Desert Eagle's first point was really helpful. The fact is, once you are in an interaction, you cannot change your looks. So stop worrying about it right then and there. If you do, you will just be more nervous and will only hurt your cause. If you are just concerned about looks in general, there are always things you can do to increase your physical attractiveness (sexy haircut, sexy facial hair, fashion/clothing, workout, etc).

Another thing that I think needs changing is the looks priority. A girl is always going to hold a guy who can approach and do it well in much brighter light than guys sitting around not approaching women. Right now, all you can do to improve your position is to approach women - so go for it!

This. Although I do think that looks play a big role and shouldn't and can't be ignored as a priority, the fact is that most guys are not approaching any girls at all. So a guy can be better looking than you are, but if he never approaches the girl or clumsily fumbles over his words, then he doesn't really have much of a chance at all. And I would tell you to stop worrying about how 'hot" the girl(s) that you have approached really are. The more you focus in on her attractiveness, the more nervous it will make you and the worse off you will be. So obviously take note of an attractive girl that you see and approach, but don't really think about it much afterwards. I mean, hot girls are still just girls, who are silly and cute. Another thing, girls can be hot without being beautiful. A lot of the hot girls you see are just wearing a lot of makeup and are showing off their bodies with revealing clothing, whereas girls with natural beauty need much less of that. So if you want to think about it like this, a hot girl without her makeup might not be so special after all.

-Pato

 

[Desert Eagle]

Although I do think that looks play a big role and shouldn't and can't be ignored as a priority

Naturally Pato . There is a time and place to focus on looks, and that's when you're able to do something about it.

 

[The Byronic Man]

Looks matter, but is just one of many components. Sounds like you may be over-estimating the importance of looks.

Looks also have its own components. Some you can change. For example, your style and fitness. Learn how to dress stylishly (not trendy), lose body fat (use diet), and perfect your body proportions (use the gym for a 1.62 shoulder-to-waist ratio).

 

[Light]

Know yourself.
Know what your assets are.
Know what your qualities are.
Count all your blessings.
Know that you have certain traits and qualities that other guys don't have.
Know what makes you a better man, what makes you an attractive man.

Don't know any of the above? Better sit down and spend an hour of time alone and start writing.

The next time you see someone good looking, you say to yourself "he may be good looking, but I'm a bad ass! He is no where near as Awesome as I am" - and you smile.

Job done.