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- Jul 20, 2015
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- 1,532
how im turning a girl from cold to insanely hot for me today
im back in the game after a long time and this girl is pushing my skillset. her name is violet and she is a 22 year old mother and a boyish hardass, due to her upbringing.
violet and i met on facebook. the conversation was about our childhood traumas. she cried. afterwards, she said she would be grateful to have the chance to meet me for one day. we start texting and its relatively platonic, but shes falling into all my frames and double texting me, so im in a good position. the passage below starts with me texting her about revealing my intentions.
i had her tied around my finger with high intensity conversation, but i made mistakes. i missed some escalation windows (i let them pass - im going through a hard time), allowed my framing go the wrong way, implemented new untested material, and experienced overinvestment in her.
what happened was she started closing up, and then drifted away for a week. i re-engaged with small talk. this is unusual behavior for me - i rarely use small talk through text. i think its boring. however...i put a lot of pressure on girls, and my issue is that i dont take it off. skills has been encouraging me to take it off, and after seeing him using small talk in his simple texting guide, i felt ok with using it. i realized its great for removing pressure and adding a new dimension to conversations.
she was giving me 1 word answers to my small talk, but then i gave her a quick call using chases amazing tactic seen here. it got her re-engaged. after a few more phone calls, she ended up in my parents driveway for a sexually charged meeting. i cut it off after 2 minutes and walked away. now she is following up with more small talk.
due to our logistics, this is gonna be a tricky one to pull off...i envision having to fuck her in her dads van in another spur of the moment meeting.
see below for the details of how ive been turning her from warm, to cold, to insanely hot:
it ends with me resetting the frame and disqualifying myself as a boyfriend. 1 week later, i text her with small talk
2 hours later, she texts me.
she does not reply that night, but texts me in the morning the next day.
i call her. she is nearby and quite testy, including bringing up the 30 minute time limit between me and her. she agrees to meet me outside of my parents place. we get off the phone and i text her my address:
i put on my boots, and walk out the door. she is already in the driveway. i walk up to her and the air is charged with sexual tension and playfulness. we instantly start vibing. here is what i recall:
we talk about it. the conversation is moving quick. im positioning myself facing her closely..and moving even closer in like im gonna kiss her... when i get closer, she positions herself slightly away. regardless, im squeezing her arm a few times and i feel something hard. i roll up her sleeve and i ask her about it
i walk away inside. its only been a few minutes. she drives away. 2 hours later, i get a text from her.
this is where it ends. this is turning into almost too much effort for me....keeping my brain busy with what to do next...when i just wanna relax and not have to worry about sending a girl into auto rejection again. but, cool to experiment with short phone conversations and meetups to get her hot again.
im back in the game after a long time and this girl is pushing my skillset. her name is violet and she is a 22 year old mother and a boyish hardass, due to her upbringing.
violet and i met on facebook. the conversation was about our childhood traumas. she cried. afterwards, she said she would be grateful to have the chance to meet me for one day. we start texting and its relatively platonic, but shes falling into all my frames and double texting me, so im in a good position. the passage below starts with me texting her about revealing my intentions.
i had her tied around my finger with high intensity conversation, but i made mistakes. i missed some escalation windows (i let them pass - im going through a hard time), allowed my framing go the wrong way, implemented new untested material, and experienced overinvestment in her.
what happened was she started closing up, and then drifted away for a week. i re-engaged with small talk. this is unusual behavior for me - i rarely use small talk through text. i think its boring. however...i put a lot of pressure on girls, and my issue is that i dont take it off. skills has been encouraging me to take it off, and after seeing him using small talk in his simple texting guide, i felt ok with using it. i realized its great for removing pressure and adding a new dimension to conversations.
she was giving me 1 word answers to my small talk, but then i gave her a quick call using chases amazing tactic seen here. it got her re-engaged. after a few more phone calls, she ended up in my parents driveway for a sexually charged meeting. i cut it off after 2 minutes and walked away. now she is following up with more small talk.
due to our logistics, this is gonna be a tricky one to pull off...i envision having to fuck her in her dads van in another spur of the moment meeting.
see below for the details of how ive been turning her from warm, to cold, to insanely hot:
fog: before we go any further i need to be real with you about something
violet: whats up
violet: ?
violet: FOG YOU CANT LEAVE ME HANGING
fog: you are maybe a little younger than im used to and it could be trouble because you have one of my biggest weaknesses
violet: what do you mean
violet: weaknesses?
violet: my anxiety be getting the best of me hahaha
*later*
violet: boy you better answer me
*later*
violet: look idk who you think you are but im gonna tell you right now you dont tell me you got to be honest about something then dip out. youd better spit it out
fog: my mental health is awful today. i am being attacked by it. its painful and time consuming to deal with especially cuz im facing it head on myself
i simply dont have it in me to respond quickly. i realize my behavior was not good and it made you anxious. it was not my intent to do that. i only wanted to achieve understanding between us
violet: i understand sorry for my own actions. i should be slightly more understanding. i hope youre feeling better or start to feel better
and when youre ready to explain what youve said ill be all ears
violet: im fishing with my family now so im occupied. hope you can have as much fun or even half as much fun as we're having. im sorry you face it on your own
fog: a personality is my biggest weakness. i am a sucker for women with personalities
violet: im legit crazy im too much to handle lol
violet: im like the guy off the movie switch. who you looking for today? *laughing face*
fog: uh oh princess trouble i will go throw myself off a bridge now lol
violet: i feel insulted lol
fog: tell me, what are the perks that come with being around a crazy girl who is too much to handle?
violet: i could be wrong, maybe im not too much to handle. maybe ive let others mould my opinion of who i am
violet: tell you what, you take the time to meet me and you can let yourself decided what the perks are. thats unless youre chicken
*later*
violet: bok bok
*later*
violet: im going to bed. goodnight fog, i hope you enjoyed your night. sleep tight
*next day*
fog: sure ill give you 30 minutes
violet: youll give me 30 minutes lol
violet: how about i give you 30 minutes?
*later*
violet: what are you doing this thursday
violet: or not?
*next day*
fog: i would love to see you on thursday violet wiolet
violet: really
fog: of course violet! i know we had a couple of rough days...but you're gentle, kind and caring...ambitious and determined...all around everything im looking for in an amazing woman and human beingmy only complaint is that thursday is forever away and i simply cannot wait!
violet: well is there a better day that works for you?
*later*
violet: thursday it is
*later*
violet: can we go for a walk?
*next day*
violet: good morning you
violet: cant be too far away you wont even answer me now
fog: sometimes i can be a bad texter but you will have my full attention when you are in my arms
violet: sometimes? youre a terrible texter period
violet: you havent even made a plan with me
*calls me once, i dont answer*
*calls me twice, i dont answer*
violet: answer me white boy
she messages me on on facebook: "bruh take the time to answer me*
*later*
fog: a walk is a great idea dear but its gonna be shitty weather...better indoors over a glass of wine/weed
violet: i honestly dont drink and when i do its grey goose
violet: you smoke?
violet: wheres this drink of whatever kind taking place
violet: ?
*next day*
fog: hi good morning
fog: my cozy and comfortable patio
violet: where do you live?
*30 minutes later*
violet: this isnt working
*later*
violet: fog!
fog: hey now, everything is ok! tell me, how does your favorite memory of your children make you feel? warm? perhaps uplifted?
fog: i live in AREA XXX
violet: i dont know what my favorite memory is. unfortunately my brain blocks out most of my memory for whatever reason
violet: i mean the day each one of them was born was probably the best two days of my life
fog: interesting that you mention that about your brain...made me think. i have this sense that...you have been perceived as overly cray cray by other people. while that is awful, i feel...so non judgemental of u and ur behavior...in the way that even if you are crazy, it is okay to be crazy around me.
violet: i do know what you mean and yes. my babies father always called me crazy and delusional due to my mental problems so it kinda stuck on me. and it eventually worked its way under my skin and yes i truly believed those words.
*next day*
fog: want to see you today! whats your schedule?
violet: at home
fog: ok... i need to be genuine with you violet. i know you are unhappy with my unresponsiveness. and that you have been not taking it so well. as i mentioned before, you are an incredibly inspiring person that i want to keep around... and you definitely dont deserve this behavior from me. lately my own therapy has me so intensely preoccupied with seeing doctors and healing from my own troubles that..it has caused me to not pay enough attention to you, causing more harm that good between us in the process. while it was not in my intent for this to happen... i feel as though things can change in an instant...by recognizing the opportunity for growth here..
*3 days later*
violet: when does this opportunity take place?
fog: now. today and tomorrow after 3. tell me whens best for you
violet: its kinda hard. in all honesty i live with my parents and im not looking to tell them anytime soon that im trying to meet people and my dad
always asks where im going (but for my own safety) and its hard to be like hey. yeah can you watch my kids so i can go meet this random person i met?
fog: violet! no pressure. lol a quick friendly walk in the future is all ive been expecting like you suggested maybe a fun chat. im not from here
so im not getting involved in much..just on temporary vacay visiting my parents before moving on to elsewhere. did you know that?
violet: no lol. glad to know!
it ends with me resetting the frame and disqualifying myself as a boyfriend. 1 week later, i text her with small talk
2 hours later, she texts me.
she does not reply that night, but texts me in the morning the next day.
*next morning*
violet: i fell asleep im sorry
violet: whats up today
fog: hi good morning
fog: not in jail and spending a couple hours with my family rn. give u a call in a bit
violet: thats good. wouldnt want you to be in jail. hope you enjoy your family time talk soon.
*later*
fog: storytime
violet: lets go
i call her. she is nearby and quite testy, including bringing up the 30 minute time limit between me and her. she agrees to meet me outside of my parents place. we get off the phone and i text her my address:
i put on my boots, and walk out the door. she is already in the driveway. i walk up to her and the air is charged with sexual tension and playfulness. we instantly start vibing. here is what i recall:
we talk about it. the conversation is moving quick. im positioning myself facing her closely..and moving even closer in like im gonna kiss her... when i get closer, she positions herself slightly away. regardless, im squeezing her arm a few times and i feel something hard. i roll up her sleeve and i ask her about it
i walk away inside. its only been a few minutes. she drives away. 2 hours later, i get a text from her.
this is where it ends. this is turning into almost too much effort for me....keeping my brain busy with what to do next...when i just wanna relax and not have to worry about sending a girl into auto rejection again. but, cool to experiment with short phone conversations and meetups to get her hot again.
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