How much can you tell about a guy based on how he treats women?

[Rakehell]

So, barring incels or red pill-esque guys who don’t get women, as well as barring really nice guy’s who go the friend route but never make it to the end zone. Matter of fact barring any mentality a guy may have that proves ineffective and leads to him not getting girls in general.

How much can you tell about a guy by what he believes, or atleast how he goes about getting girls? A guy that gets girls but views them in a certain light or uses sneaky tactics to go about it.

I’m asking because I have this friend who’s also good with girls, but prides himself on being manipulative/emotionally abusive. Sadistic in a way. Objectively this works for him and it gives them other benefits that I don’t get.

For instance i’m pretty open with my intentions, I don’t tell girl’s they’re the only one or lead them carrot and string with the hopes of a relationship in the future. So likewise girl’s don’t hound me and they usually end up getting boyfriends at some point, ending our seduction. How long they last depends on the girl but obviously most girls aren’t just gonna get fucked forever with no prospect of a relationship at some point. But there’s no hard feelings afterward and they usually come back at some point.

He on the other hand isn’t open with his intentions. He’ll have a girl thinking she’s a viable prospect with no intentions of actually settling down. He’ll play mind games, letting her suspect there’s other girls, wrapping her up further and further mostlikely pushing her to a mental breakdown. But at the same time building an emotional infatuation and investment.

Obviously his methods work too but they often lead to crazy behavior from the girls, like stalking, vandalism, constant calls/texting, tires slashed, getting them even more worked up. Yet they stick around because theres still hope for that fated relationship.

I don’t know who’s way is better speaking from an objective stance. But I am interested to know what you can tell about a guy, looking at his methodology in getting girl’s and keeping them.

 

[trashKENNUT]

Hard to tell.

This is Zac and his old men philosophy.

I am a guy who parents can love and same guy where parents say that they will never let their daughters near them.

There can only be one God. You or the person infront of you.

An honourable self aware parent will let the men win, not because to please him but recognizing that in order for their daughter to survive, he must be allowed to take the baton.

But everyone including Girlschase members, we don't want that.

We have egos. Misplaced egos.

And when you misplaced egos, you destroy the fabric of a civilization

z@c+

 

[Chase]

@SunKing,

What's good for the goose is good for the gander.

Guys who play mind games with girls will tend to do it with other guys too.

Every guy I've met who was a manipulator with women was a manipulator with everyone.

I don't know what your relationship is like with this friend, but it's quite possible that your impression of your friendship with him is more analogous to these girls' impressions of their relationships with him than you might suspect.

But perhaps you already suspect that -- after all, you're on here asking about it

Chase

 

[trashKENNUT]

Guys who play mind games with girls will tend to do it with other guys too.

Every guy I've met who was a manipulator with women was a manipulator with everyone.

I second this. Very important

Added Content:

But what if I recognize what I am doing but the world is not trusted?

Here's here.

 

[Rakehell]

@SunKing,

What's good for the goose is good for the gander.

Guys who play mind games with girls will tend to do it with other guys too.

Every guy I've met who was a manipulator with women was a manipulator with everyone.

I don't know what your relationship is like with this friend, but it's quite possible that your impression of your friendship with him is more analogous to these girls' impressions of their relationships with him than you might suspect.

But perhaps you already suspect that -- after all, you're on here asking about it

Chase

Haha yeah you caught me. Admittedly I was already suspicious after he told on himself (he essentially told me that he “learned how to manipulate”) in a conversation we had.

I just wanted to see if one of you guys would confirm my suspicions. He sometimes act’s very vulnerable and talks about his emotional issues in excess which I hear is pretty common with sociopaths trying to “throw you off the trail”. Also wouldn’t it be counterintuitive for a manipulator to be so forthcoming with “weakness” unless it was a ploy for your target to do the same.

 

[Tim Iron]

Chase is right. After a while (and that's if he hasn't started it), he will definitely use his manipulative skills on everyone and not only the women that he is sleeping with.

 

[Lover]

Hey @SunKing. I have a theory, mostly based on my own life, that someone treating others with little regard or respect also treats himself that way. In one form or another, he consistently does things that are bad for him, more than your average person. Stuff like substance abuse, sleeping too little, not eating properly, lots of procrastination, running away from tough life situations etc.

I'm curious if you recognize some lack of self-respect in your friend?

 

[Rakehell]

Hey @SunKing. I have a theory, mostly based on my own life, that someone treating others with little regard or respect also treats himself that way. In one form or another, he consistently does things that are bad for him, more than your average person. Stuff like substance abuse, sleeping too little, not eating properly, lots of procrastination, running away from tough life situations etc.

I'm curious if you recognize some lack of self-respect in your friend?

Eh @Lover, no more than any other guy who parties sometimes honestly. As far as I know they aren’t secretly abusing drugs, or sleep deprived. Running away from life applies somewhat. Overall though I wouldn’t say they neglect themself. He actually has alot more drive and self regard than most people I know.

Highly neglectful of other’s though, and consciously, the way he explains it is like he gets ecstatic knowing he has power to hurt women psychologically. He’s the type of guy who’ll kick a girl out after having sex with her, then brag about it in a almost sadistic manner.

But he does it for validation, so maybe that’s an indicator of low self regard?

Edit~ And this isn’t just how I’m framing it because of some moral belief I have on how he goes about seducing. This is the most raw articulation of how he is. Honestly i’m neutral about his methods (it gets him results), but as Chase said, I don’t believe he’s trustworthy because of them.

 

[Chase]

@Lover,

Sociopaths don't tend to have low self-regard. At least not the ones I've known.

Actually they view themselves as more evolved than everyone else -- all those weak-willed people still chained by sentiment. The sociopath, detached and clear-eyed, is able to toy with others using their emotions as a lever, and he finds all this very personally amusing.

Sociopaths do have a certain advantage from their emotional detachment that others don't enjoy. However they also have disadvantages which are largely invisible to them; they tend to be either trapped in low-trust relationships with other sociopaths, in which there is this constant game of "Who's going to backstab who first?", or else they settle for relationships with lower level people they can easily control who aren't able to detect their deception. High-level non-sociopaths insulate themselves against sociopaths due to sociopaths' low trustworthiness -- it's no fun working on your stuff while there's someone around constantly looking for ways to gain leverage on you. It's just annoying and bothersome.

That said, sociopath seducers can be some of the best guys to be around during your intermediate / low advanced learning stages of game, as they tend to be very slick, have a lot of effective techniques they use, and are able to achieve some reasonably impressive results with girls. Past a certain level of advancement you will outgrow them, since at a certain point you will probably want high trust relationships with higher level women, and these kinds of women sniff out and avoid sociopaths and their games (thus, you also cannot go too deep into sociopath game yourself... nor will you want to, not being a sociopath).

Chase

 

[Lover]

Eh @Lover, no more than any other guy who parties sometimes honestly. As far as I know they aren’t secretly abusing drugs, or sleep deprived. Running away from life applies somewhat. Overall though I wouldn’t say they neglect themself. He actually has alot more drive and self regard than most people I know.

Highly neglectful of other’s though, and consciously, the way he explains it is like he gets ecstatic knowing he has power to hurt women psychologically. He’s the type of guy who’ll kick a girl out after having sex with her, then brag about it in a almost sadistic manner.

But he does it for validation, so maybe that’s an indicator of low self regard?

Edit~ And this isn’t just how I’m framing it because of some moral belief I have on how he goes about seducing. This is the most raw articulation of how he is. Honestly i’m neutral about his methods (it gets him results), but as Chase said, I don’t believe he’s trustworthy because of them.

I try to measure things on a spectrum. If he's highly validation-seeking about his successful attempts of emotional sadism (in lack of better terms), it may come from a place of low self respect. Or maybe it comes from childhood traumas, avoidant parenting or something similar that we will never know of. Maybe a combination.

And the very fact that one has to resort to behavior like this (emotional sadism) in the first place would suggest low self-regard in my mind. But this is me using myself as a reference, and this could be a flaw in this case.

Maybe in very odd circumstances where I felt other people deserved it, I might approve of behaving like this myself. But randomly and consciously toying with people's emotions because it brings you amusement hmmm... nope can't relate

Some people's reward systems work in interesting ways. That is my takeaway from these posts by you and @Chase .

And btw, I'm not here to say that I never did something similar. I had similar behavior at times when I was younger but I think I did it out of low confidence and unconsciously. But what is going on deep down when people behave like this... it intrigues me

 

[Troy]

Run while you can my friend. Run!

It is just a matter of time before he stabs you in the back as well. There is also a possibility that what he tells you to your face is not what he would tell someone else.

Sociopath 101 class

Run!

I believe a seducer must fuck with integrity, morals and self respect, and clearly your friend does not know how to do any of those things.