This one is hugely important!
We are talking and the conversation goes to "relationships" topic. Ans she starts telling me how her ex did something, said something, bla bla.
So what I do: I let her talk about it for some 20 secs, acting bored and just saying like "aham.." But if she goes longer than that, I just cut her off, like "Are you serious? Are you gotta be telling me about your ex's all night?" in a playful mood, but firmly, like I'm not into hearing her ex's stories because I am not.
Also, she starts telling you how a guy mistreated her. Well this one is more tricky because (as I think) she wants to convey a point, I guess about how she doesn't want to be treated. So I would listen to the story and then just say something like "of course I'd like to hear both sides of the story, but usually I'd say a guy that acts like this is insecure, again I don't know him", end move on to next topic. So listen to her, but don't take sides, don't defend her, don't agree with her, but also don't cut her off. Although, as an alternative you can just cut her off and say something like "Are you gotta complain about your Exs?.." But I think this one may backfire because it may her feel unheard, am I correct?
I always thought it's a bad idea to talk about past relationships on the first date, so I totally avoid these stories, but they just come up on every single first date I have.
How is your experience guys? Do these topics come up on your first dates? How do you handle these scenarios I mentioned? Add your inputs on what girls tell about their Exs and how you handle it.
Best!
We are talking and the conversation goes to "relationships" topic. Ans she starts telling me how her ex did something, said something, bla bla.
So what I do: I let her talk about it for some 20 secs, acting bored and just saying like "aham.." But if she goes longer than that, I just cut her off, like "Are you serious? Are you gotta be telling me about your ex's all night?" in a playful mood, but firmly, like I'm not into hearing her ex's stories because I am not.
Also, she starts telling you how a guy mistreated her. Well this one is more tricky because (as I think) she wants to convey a point, I guess about how she doesn't want to be treated. So I would listen to the story and then just say something like "of course I'd like to hear both sides of the story, but usually I'd say a guy that acts like this is insecure, again I don't know him", end move on to next topic. So listen to her, but don't take sides, don't defend her, don't agree with her, but also don't cut her off. Although, as an alternative you can just cut her off and say something like "Are you gotta complain about your Exs?.." But I think this one may backfire because it may her feel unheard, am I correct?
I always thought it's a bad idea to talk about past relationships on the first date, so I totally avoid these stories, but they just come up on every single first date I have.
How is your experience guys? Do these topics come up on your first dates? How do you handle these scenarios I mentioned? Add your inputs on what girls tell about their Exs and how you handle it.
Best!
