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How to compete with older and more mature guys at clubs?

UnaverageNavy

Rookie
Rookie
Joined
Dec 12, 2022
Messages
6
I am 20 years old (Canada) and recently started night gaming but I have noticed that although a lot of the women are in their early 20s, they tend to favor the older guys in their late 20s or early 30s. I have not only noticed this with other guys but also when going out with wings (26-28) that are not even as good-looking as me but get more eyes. The fact that I have a baby face and can't grow a beard doesn't help either. Does anyone have any suggestions on how I can out-alpha the older guys?
 

MuST0BtA1NSkR1Lla

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Dec 13, 2019
Messages
296
I am 20 years old (Canada) and recently started night gaming but I have noticed that although a lot of the women are in their early 20s, they tend to favor the older guys in their late 20s or early 30s. I have not only noticed this with other guys but also when going out with wings (26-28) that are not even as good-looking as me but get more eyes. The fact that I have a baby face and can't grow a beard doesn't help either. Does anyone have any suggestions on how I can out-alpha the older guys?

I ran into this problem when I was younger and honestly I went the Scott Pilgrim route and went out with younger women.

If you want to “Out Alpha” people you aren’t going to do it at the club unless you go out and invest a shitload of time into getting that set up. *[Friends with bouncers, ticket chicks, promoters, etc] When I look back at my younger years clubbing I mostly used that time as learning from my fuck ups.

Id recommend for a beginner to choose a better environment so that you’ll understand what it means to be alpha. Perhaps the local university bar on wing Wednesday might be a better place to start.
 
Last edited:

mist

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jul 2, 2021
Messages
375
1. Make it specific and measurable

I recommend using transition phases.

2. Stop focusing on the noise and pay attention to the signal

You can’t be 27 or grow a fire beard tomorrow, but you are alive and breathing and can compete…better yet let’s reframe that as you can succeed.

Ontop of being alive what else can you do?

No need to feel inferior.

I will elaborate later maybe
 
you miss 100% of the shots you don't take

Derek da man

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Jan 24, 2020
Messages
320
Firstly, I'm not the best on here to comment on "Club" game but I don't see it as vastly different to game in most social situations with larger groups of people around.

Whilst you see all the other guys as competition, which I agree they are, they are not trying to compete with you directly. Girls rarely go out to "go home with someone" in which case you are competing with other guys. Girls go out for a good time, if they meet someone they like enough to go home with then great, but they have a standard unique to her and that's what you have to meet.

The more mature guys, as you put it, will have a more relaxed confidence about them. They know what they have to offer her, so when they are with her they give her "good feelings" from a fun interesting interaction, and a that's what she remembers. They have their eye on the ball, open her, hook her, isolate and take away. They will probably open a number of girls before they get the hook, but they will read the signals quickly if she's not interested and move on. The fact that they will move on can often trigger a girl to change her frame and take the hook, so she doesn't lose the interesting fun guy she's been chatting to.

Younger guys are often very "try hard" and "hang in there" and persist which is fine to a point, but she will see this as very "try hard" so you also need to value you time and effort and move. Give them an opener and a couple of minutes then say, "it's been lovely chatting to you, but I need to get back to my friends, perhaps we'll catch up later" and appear to be going to move on. I've had lots of girls that then immediately try to re-engage before she loses your attention. Sometimes I'll chat a bit longer, sometimes I move on. If she's still giving signals she's more than interested so worth returning to later. That doesn't mean hours later, although it could be, you can be back with her in 10 minutes and you'll find she can me much more receptive second time too. When you have a room full of girls to chat to don't get hung up on one of them, repeat and rinse this process to sort out a number of prospects. This can also make them chase too as girls can be quite competitive when they see a prospective guy they like chatting to another girl.

Just because you're 20 it doesn't mean you can't act and dress a little more mature like a 25-30-year-old. If they ask your age deflect it. Girls usually ask your age either as a general question so deflecting it is fine, or they want to use it as an excuse to say "no" which means you've failed to set up an attractive frame anyway. Half the girls I've taken home have never asked my age until a second or third lay anyway. Admittedly I'm on the other end of the spectrum now, but the point is you're not competing with the other guys really, you need to show you can meet her desire for a fun time. So, you need to change your perspective and mindset and things will fall out better for you.
 
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