How to handle "group pick up": can you deep dive?

[lux7]

I'm not talking about "group" approaches and not even social circles.

I'm talking more about like laid back discussions with people you met that same day/evening or just met right then.
Those situations where you already in the group and the people are either sitting around a small table or standing up outside a venue in some sort of semi-circle or full circle.

How would you go ahead with a girl you'd intend to move forward with?

I've always thought the people who made a pass in front of others or who gave too much continuous attention to the girl were more often than not diggin their own grave.
So far my idea has always been "be cool in the group, see if you can catch her once she's on her own".

By I was wondering: can you deep dive a girl in a such a situation?

 

[pks391]

I'm not talking about "group" approaches and not even social circles.

I'm talking more about like laid back discussions with people you met that same day/evening or just met right then.
Those situations where you already in the group and the people are either sitting around a small table or standing up outside a venue in some sort of semi-circle or full circle.

How would you go ahead with a girl you'd intend to move forward with?

I've always thought the people who made a pass in front of others or who gave too much continuous attention to the girl were more often than not diggin their own grave.
So far my idea has always been "be cool in the group, see if you can catch her once she's on her own".

By I was wondering: can you deep dive a girl in a such a situation?

In my case, the girl was a part of a group of 5-6 really good looking girls. The environment was a classroom. I was all by my lonesome without any group or circle. She was not a part of my immediate social circle, but due to solid fundamentals and a little bit of showing off my strong points, this girl actually broke her group and came to chat with me. The result was a pretty good deep dive later. I also flirted a bit with her at that time which was received quite positively by her. The conversation went into the kind of 'Bubble' that Chase has described where the girl and you shut off everyone outside. I would also like to add that in this environment it wasnt just her who received me like this but many other girls like 4 or 5 of which at least 3 were hot/cute girls.

If you ask my demeanour in the situation it was SUPER chill and bored/wary. Like "this guy keeps to himself and is a loner and pretty much does not mingle with anybody, but damn when he opens his mouth to speak, he says some really hit-the-nail-on-the-head/strong stuff." Mostly i used the tips described in Chase's articles.

So in my experience, having really good fundamentals and being the kind of 'Peacock' or 'leader'.....darn .....i can't find the word......but if i have to describe it with a reference i would say, James Spader in Boston Legal or if you're into anime then Archer from Fate/Stay Night or sort of Tywin/Tyrion Lannisterish traits. Edginess combined with a solid deep diving ability. Thats the kind of thing that will help you along in getting the girl to talk to you or deep dive her in the situation you described. This was in my experience, it could be different in another situation. Although, I did spend a lot of time emphasizing on just one small point. There are many more things which can help you but I just shared my experience

I've always thought the people who made a pass in front of others or who gave too much continuous attention to the girl were more often than not diggin their own grave.

You're quite right, I'm saying so because it happens with people around me who act like this too...I tend to be pretty aloof/chill.....

 

[foggy]

Talk to her and don't bring anyone else into the conversation. If she's totally in to you, she won't even care about or notice anyone else. You should try to isolate her though.

 

[Fuck This]

In a noisy restaurant it is easy to isolate while around the table by taking a seat next to your target and talking low enough they have to lean in to hear. if you pull your chair back from the table, they will scoot over to get closer to hear. Or be proactive and move over closer to them so your shoulders touch. Then add kino as appropriate.

In a quieter venue that is a little more difficult and you have to distance yourself from the group enough that your conversation does not seem to invite outside participation.

 

[Chase]

Lux-

Like the other guys here, yeah, you definitely can.

One caveat: always try to end the deep dive yourself first. And keep things on the lighter / flirtier side. Come up for air a lot.

If other people interrupt you, it can be awkward to go back. And if you go too deep and it feels like it is "time" to make a move but you do not because it wouldn't be socially acceptable to do so, you risk a missed escalation window and then it's awkward later.

If you keep it lighter though and intersperse with more humor and nonverbal flirting (that only she picks up on), it's easier to drop it naturally when someone else jumps in, and easier to avoid having it go so deep that now it's time to make something happen.

However, since she's already comfortable flirting and deep diving with you, when you do see the chance to make something happen, you can jump back into the chat with her, deep dive hard, and bring it to that point, then grab her hand and lead her out of there.

Chase

 

[lux7]

Thanks one Chase, good and actionable tip.

Basically it's "be a bit more light-hearted and party-spirit"