How to increase a woman's confidence?

[NealIRC]

-When you on the street and women who know you are in the car and see you standing, or they see you somewhere in public, they don't care to wave at you or anything. How do you get out of her people-she-knows-zone and into the friend zone? Do you gotta look/act like a gay guy?

-When you see a woman on and off, and then 1 day, she finds your Facebook, she becomes discreet about it. She won't even use a "Btw, I found your Facebook" as a starter conversation. Nor will she add you. Whereas for me, if I found a girl's Facebook, 2 things. If I'll see her recently, I'll bring it up ask to add her in real life. If I won't see her for a year or more, then I'll just add her.

-And the other way around, when women view your Facebook constantly, and then find you in real life like on the same bus, they won't approach you in real life either about "I see your Facebook before."

-All the people who click "Like" on my photos are all guys. ;/

So I think the theme of this thread is, women don't go around looking for situations to start up convos with someone. They probably do this to gay guys more though. ;D

 

[Hue]

So I think the theme of this thread is, women don't go around looking for situations to start up convos with someone.

Yes. Women rarely start the conversation with guys. Starting up conversation with a stranger is a masculine thing to do.

They probably do this to gay guys more though. ;D

Stereotypical gay men are more feminine, and behave very similarly to women. Though in my experience, it is still almost always the gay guy to start conversation with the woman / groups of women.


What women do go out and do, is place themselves in situations for someone else to start conversations with them.


Hue

 

[NealIRC]

Starting up conversation with a stranger is a masculine thing to do.

While I certainly agree with this, my examples were for women that already know the guy.

More examples.

-When women find your real name, they don't care to try to look you up on Facebook and such.

Years ago, I actively hitted on a manager of a cell phone store by doing all kinds of thing to the store including the manager's car she parked in the parking lot. For a year. And close to the end of the year, I gave them a document which had my name on it.

13 months of doing this okay? And then I left. 2 years after that, I found her on Facebook by chance and viewed her profile. That caused me to be on the "People she may know" list and caused her to view my profile. And so some days later she showed up on mine.

-I once left my credit card and passport card to a female cashier. It was where you give them the card and they insert it in to a machine. And show them an ID. Well she forgot to give it back. Store later used my credit card # to try to make transactions in other states.

But the female cashier runs a Facebook page for that grocery store. She later viewed my profile not on her account but on the grocery store page she created. At 1st I wondered how she know my name? But eventually I had to close the credit card and get a new 1. And yes, I have frequented there several times with her as a cashier, also to see if she will say something, and apparently not.

And so and so forth.

 

[Hue]

Generally, you seem to be viewing interactions you have with women in a way that places importance onto unimportant factors. We are all guilty of this to some degree.

If you've already had large investments with women (in the case of the manager and the cashier), it is often times better to stop investing - because your mental & physical investments with them are no longer helping you achieve your goal.

I would recommend finding new women to talk to (that have no idea who or what you are), instead of giving so much mental energy into women that don't reciprocate your investment.


Hue

 

[NealIRC]

Women rarely start the conversation with guys. Starting up conversation with a stranger is a masculine thing to do.

Just want to point out that this statement is false when it comes to Black girls, imo Blacks girls are always looking for excuses to say something to guys, or White guys, I wouldn't know but probably all types of guys.

They always say excuse me, whenever they're about to pass you, even if you're "not in the way."

If I'm standing on a public bus or train with an unzipped backpack, Black women are guaranteed to tell you that, White and Hispanic women won't unless they're really old.

Whenever I sneeze, Black girls are guaranteed to say something. So whenever I'm in a computer lab and sneeze, all the Black girls around will say something, White and Hispanic women usually don't.

Not that it matters but Black girls always say "Bless you," "God bless," or "God bless you." Only White people say "Gesundheit," as well as atheists and Orthodox Jews.

 

[Hue]

These statistics^ you're gathering are irrelevant to starting conversation with people.

See, saying "excuse me" when passing someone is a social norm that people follow to be considerate of another's personal space. It is not starting conversation with someone.

Likewise, saying "bless you", "god bless", "god bless you" or "gesundheit" is a social norm that people follow when someone sneezes. Again, it is not starting conversation with someone.


Starting conversation would begin with a "hello" or asking a question like, "how's your day going?", and if both parties are interested in conversation, would continue into an exchange of dialogue.


Hue

 

[ThePhoenix]

Women rarely start the conversation with guys. Starting up conversation with a stranger is a masculine thing to do.

Just want to point out that this statement is false when it comes to Black girls, imo Blacks girls are always looking for excuses to say something to guys, or White guys, I wouldn't know but probably all types of guys.

Ahhhh, Neal.... you just gave me a good damn laugh, because as you may know, I am a white guy who hits on black girls with an exclusivity that is borderline religious, and I can tell you with absolute confidence that, as much as I wish Hue's statement were false when it came to black girls, that's absolute rubbish. Well, either that or I need to move to Chicago! LMAO.

With the exception of the extremely occasional pleasantries that just about any human being that wasn't raised by wild animals will tend to issue in given situations - with no intent to converse any further, - these are the only times I ever recall having had a black girl I didn't know say anything to me if I didn't open her first:

• Friend or family of someone I know;
• Classmate;
• Co-worker, and usually only after knowing I like black girls;
• Someone trying to sell me something;
• Someone asking for money/smokes/weed, and I could probably count those times on one hand.

They don't open me otherwise. Trust me, I'd notice!

What genuinely random black girls will do sometimes is make eye contact, or tear off from her friend to happen to look at something on a shelf close to me, or hang around longer if she notices I placed myself in a store aisle in the direction she was drifting towards. But, as I was painfully reminded several times just the other day, if I don't make the first obvious move (touch her or speak to her), she just walks away.

Phoenix

 

[NealIRC]

These statistics^ you're gathering are irrelevant to starting conversation with people.

That's fine, but they're relevant to getting noticed by people.

And that's probably their goal. And up to you to take it to the next level.

I note that when Black girls pass me, it's not just whether me and them are facing each other that that say "Excuse me" as they about to pass, even if I face against them.

1 time I was trying to go through an opening where 1 was blocking it partially, so I decided to just squeeze through her, and when that happened she said "Next time say scuuuuse me." But I could tell she was purposely block the exit, which is why I didn't say anything.

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ThePhoenix: heh must be about looks then, shrug.