How to react to "I have a boyfriend" Several scenarios, different reactions

[razir110]

Hi all.

I just read this in the forum:

sneaky_charm wrote:
Me: Hi, you look beautiful!
Her: Oh thanks! (Smiling.)
Me: Come over here.
Her: I have a boyfriend. (Checking if I back out, and back out I did.)

Chase's comment:
A little tease here followed by reiterating your command, like, "He never needs to know. Just come here for a moment," works best. A bit of a sly James-Bond-making-a-sardonic-comment-to-an-impulsive-but-naïve-young-woman type facial expression goes well with this.

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I would like to discuss the Bf brush-off with you.

I think that if when you cold approach her and she tells you she has a boyfriend in the first few secs of the interaction, it's a 100% rejection, she would never risk testing you like this if she were interested, so it can't be a test or play hard to get. She isn't interested (it's irrelevant if she has a Bf or not)

My experience:
A cold approach. We are both sitting in a cafe, she is some tables away from me, alone. I walk up to her and:
Me: Hi, I noticed you sitting here and I want to tell you that I love your nails.
She: (Very reluctant to my opener, looking back at her phone): Thank you.
Me: (unaffected, talking in a relaxed, confident way) So are you just hanging out or something?
She: I'm travelling with my husband.
Me: Oh, you are married Well, your husband has an excellent taste!
She: Thanks
Me: it was nice talking to you, enjoy your travels.

She was clearly rejecting me, so I ejected with class (in my opinion) instead of persisting on a dead case.

So, when a girl tells you about s Bf in these conditions, would you ever consider persisting?..

Now another case: you are flirting a lot, you've been talking for a few mins and you decide to ask her out. She starts to resist:
Her: Hummmm I don't think I have time
Me: Are you the Prime Minister or something? I'm pretty sure you can get a few hours to hang out.
Her: Well, but I have to work a lot
Me: What is better to relax after a day of work than hanging out with me?
Her: Ahmmm I have a boyfriend (visibly running out of BS to say, never mentioned the Bf before, so why now?)
Me: What a load of BS, you don't have a Bf!..
Her: (laughing) Yes I do!
Me: Look NAME, I think the Bf thing is premature, we aren't dating yet, I know you are eager to meet me, but lets take this slowly. (continues)

So in this case, I would totally ignore the Bf because it's just being used an obvious excuse to... brush me off?, test me? I don't know yet, so I'll just persist. I would use it, and I do, to be cocky and show her I don't buy into her BS, even if it's as extreme as Bf being brought up to the conversation.

What do you guys think about the Bf brush-off? When would you call it a day and when would you persist?

Best!

 

[Space]

I don't have a script for this, but I've always got contacts from girls who told me they have boyfriends before, at least in recent times. Unless when I definitely found out where else I did screw up the interaction. Expect once, but it was probably for the better it didn't work out anyways.

I've said something either like I'm interested in you as a person or I'm not looking for a girlfriend in you anyways. Then they were like: Okay, we can keep in touch! Nothing special. I don't want to derail your thread, so no more tangential stories.

Disclaimer: I'm not that big of a Casanova to approach dozens girls daily, but when I do, I do.

 

[razir110]

@Space,

But saying you are into her as a person, is so BS.. I think these things should be told in the middle of the conversation indirectly. Like asking her questions, telling about yourself, deep-diving. Plus you are putting yourself into friend, innocent guy territory. You are showing her you aren't convicted about your desire to get her and you are now downplaying the interaction.

I believe the best approach if you decide to fight the case is to simply be cocky and playful about it and make it 100% clear you aren't buying into the Bf story under any circumstance. It's just important to understand if it's the right scenario to actually pursue this approach or you may be seen as extremely annoying.

 

[Space]

But saying you are into her as a person, is so BS..

You may call it total BS from one perspective, I totally get that. But how about another perspective? The Fuck Yes!-perspective? Maybe girls can sense that?

I've heard this cocky thing may work better in other parts of the world, but I've just realized many here on this board are probably not big on travel in general and exploring different cultures and perspectives.

 

[Space]

I've said something either like I'm interested in you as a person or I'm not looking for a girlfriend in you anyways. Then they were like: Okay, we can keep in touch! Nothing special.

I forgot to mention that later when checked one of these girl's Instagram account, I've found there absolutely nothing resembling a boyfriend. Rather night outs with girlfriends. So an "I have a boyfriend" means so much these days.

 

[Fuck This]

It's funny, I've had girls withhold the BF because they liked the attention they were getting. The "BF objection" is an early out and I think your approach needs to be less gamey.

I had one acquaintance who would reply: "Well what you need is a MANFriend" and point at himself... I thought this was pretty ballsy.

I had one girl who I started a conversation with by the pool. (For Perspective, she was Ms. Fitness USA less than 10 years prior) She mentioned she was there with her boyfriend. I asked what company he was with since it was an industry trip. She said "I'll introduce you". So he comes up and it was Christopher Knight (Who played Peter Brady in the Brady Bunch). If I'd have pushed it like you did, I'd have never met him .

 

[Space]

I had one acquaintance who would reply: "Well what you need is a MANFriend" and point at himself... I thought this was pretty ballsy.

Sounds good. As long as your native language is, or uses a similar term for this category to English.

By the way this reminds me of this Jordan Peterson clip with where he talks about how phony today's boyfriend-girlfriend categories are. I agree with the premise.

 

[Space]

I don't have a script for this, but I've always got contacts from girls who told me they have boyfriends before, at least in recent times. Unless when I definitely found out where else I did screw up the interaction. Expect once, but it was probably for the better it didn't work out anyways.

I've said something either like I'm interested in you as a person or I'm not looking for a girlfriend in you anyways. Then they were like: Okay, we can keep in touch! Nothing special. I don't want to derail your thread, so no more tangential stories.

Disclaimer: I'm not that big of a Casanova to approach dozens girls daily, but when I do, I do.

Here's a video I just came across better explaining the same concept. So I probably conveyed to girls the same attitude when I got away with whatever I said them in the above examples. The guys interviewed in the video supposedly run one of the better YouTube channels on pick-up and dating.