How to REJECT a girl?

[RAFox]

There‘s a girl in my class who likes me. Sadly, I don‘t like her.

There are a couple of reasons for that.
One, because she has bad grades, and I‘m just not attracted to girls with bad grades. She's...“less intelligent“ in general. Practically an air-head.
Another being her taste in music. Before I continue, I just want to make clear that I don‘t judge anyone by his/her choice of music. She is a Justin Bieber fan. Not liking his music kind of fan, but wanting him inside her and having posters of him all over her room kind of fan. A “Belieber“.
She‘s sub-par, and I don‘t go for sub-par girls. She's actually nothing but a pretty face.
However, I knew she was somewhat interested in me, but I shrugged it off, thinking nothing of it, until she approached me the other day, and (indirectly) asked me out on a date. I didn‘t want to reject her, because honestly, I don‘t know how to, and she has a very big friend-circle. So I said to myself, what the hell, and agreed. I kissed her on that date.

Fatal mistake. I don‘t know why I did it, but I wish I hadn‘t. I don‘t want her, at all. But now I don‘t know how to get rid of her without scarring her emotionally and making things awkward. between us (like ignoring and not talking to eachother anymore)

So, can you get me out of here, guys? I‘m really afraid of getting together with her ad hurting her.
By the way, she‘s not ugly or anything, in fact, she‘s one if the prettiest girls in my class abd she‘s 18, born a couple of months earlier than me.
Any suggestions? I couldn't find an article about rejecting a girl, so that's. why I‘m asking you guys..

 

[Franco]

Hey Fox,

Fatal mistake. I don‘t know why I did it, but I wish I hadn‘t. I don‘t want her, at all. But now I don‘t know how to get rid of her without scarring her emotionally and making things awkward. between us (like ignoring and not talking to eachother anymore)

If you haven't slept with her, then I wouldn't worry about any serious emotional scarring. She might be sad for awhile that you didn't want her, but she'll get over it when the next guy she likes takes her to bed and gives her a deeper, passionate experience and connection.

So, can you get me out of here, guys?

I would just be direct and upfront with her. The girls that rejected me and that I've come to appreciate the most are the ones who didn't lead me on wild goose chases and were directly upfront with me. You can do this in-person or over text if you're worried about her making a scene (possibly at your school or another public area). Something along the lines of:

Hey Sara, I've enjoyed spending time with you, but I need to upfront with you as well. You're a great gal, but I don't think there is that "spark" between us that we might have both been looking for. I think we should take a step back and keep things friendly and mutual before someone's feelings get hurt. I'm not the type of guy to purposely hurt a girl, and it would make me feel awful if I did that to you. I really hope you can see things from my perspective and that we can continue to be friends.

Feel free to paraphrase this and give it your own style.

If she's really into you, she might get a little hurt by this after you say it, but that will be unavoidable. She might even give you the silent treatment for awhile or try to avoid you, but the best thing to do is just to remain unfazed, calm, and friendly until she comes around. Eventually she will get past it, and she will probably appreciate your forwardness later on when she feels comfortable around you again.

This is my advice. =)

- Franco

 

[RAFox]

Thanks, Franco.

As you said, yes, she is quite into me as she is always the one asking if I would like to, e.g., “get out abdo something together“ and things of that sort, I actually never get to ask her because she takes the offensive there. We only meet up once in a week or two, so that‘s okay, I think.
Furthermore, I have to learn the difference between texting her almost never and not texting her at all and have her keep taking the offense. Although I think the latter would show lack of interest, so I‘ll have to find my balance.

Anyway, thanks for helping me out!

 

[lao che]

this is what's known as a high quality problem, brother!

why not just fuck her? manage her expectations, let her know you're not looking for something serious, and have at it

also, read chase's post on lowering your standards and dating more, and higher quality, girls.

sounds like you could have the best of both worlds here. and there would plenty of benefits. not least of which is a lot of practice sex with a hot chick.

 

[RAFox]

Lao che, that‘s right, I‘m also keeping the relationship going because of “the practice“, which doesn't exactly suit me, as I feel like I am using her....

It's my ego‘s fault, after I made the list of traits I look for in a girl, I just can't stick with anything else (which isn't necessarily bad as my motions seem to communicate I‘m only looking for a high class girl, and that immediately catches the attention of said kind of girl. It's like magic!).