I was talking to a girl on campus today. Her name is Ashley. Ashley asked me some questions and reacted well to my opener. But when I tried to do Sexual Tension by touching her, she asked me to stop after a while. She was also looking at her phone a lot and the conversation had a lot of akward pauses. I excused myself from the conversation to leave under the assumption that she is not interested. What do you guys think? How would you define a girl who is not interested?
Ken
Where did you touch her?
About how long did you touch her?
Where did the interaction occur? In the open or behind closed doors.
I'll keep my answer brief since I don't have enough details. When you just meet a girl begin to touch her early into the interaction: her hands, shoulders and upper back are safe places to start. My guess is you touched her too much or too long and it made her uncomfortable.
Describe your body language and the entire interaction.
Troy
Where did you touch her?
About how long did you touch her?
Where did the interaction occur? In the open or behind closed doors.
I'll keep my answer brief since I don't have enough details. When you just meet a girl begin to touch her early into the interaction: her hands, shoulders and upper back are safe places to start. My guess is you touched her too much or too long and it made her uncomfortable.
Describe your body language and the entire interaction.
Troy
- Joined
- Aug 12, 2015
- Messages
- 129
Basically your problem here is your lack of calibration. This is an interaction between to human beings pickup IS NOT some script you follow mindlessly with steps. There reason pickup is hard is because you need lots of practice to get better - why do you need the practice? Because it helps you become calibrated and know when to move forward.
Every girl has a level of of interest when you first interact with her - she may be totally keen or you would have to be the last man on earth for her to want you. Its good that you thought to yourself - oh she has responded well to my opener so lets try for something more - the more you do this the faster you'll learn when its the correct thing to do. It just so happens you went too fast before she was conformable with all the touching and then she closed off. Now depending on how fast she starting looking at her phone in the interaction after the opener is how receptive she was. If she went to her phone RIGHT after you opened then she wasn't very receptive at all and you're wrong about thinking she was keen when you opened. However if there was a time period where she wasn't looking at her phone after you opened then you probably showed to much interest in her too fast - it may be that she started looking at her phone when you first touched her. If that's what happened you didn't qualify or screen her enough before you starting touching her. When a girl suddenly starts doing something like showing negative body language or looking at her phone is this case you've probably shown too much interest - so try to figure out what your mistake actually was. If this happens to you and you are in the moment don't panic - just mimic her to a certain extend. Good ways to do this is looking away - showing the side of your body to her instead of the front- maybe looking at your phone too or maybe the "bored look". If she doesn't change how she is acting after you do this for a bit in my experience the set is probably a lost cause.
In situations where your not sure what to do try something new.
Skid
Every girl has a level of of interest when you first interact with her - she may be totally keen or you would have to be the last man on earth for her to want you. Its good that you thought to yourself - oh she has responded well to my opener so lets try for something more - the more you do this the faster you'll learn when its the correct thing to do. It just so happens you went too fast before she was conformable with all the touching and then she closed off. Now depending on how fast she starting looking at her phone in the interaction after the opener is how receptive she was. If she went to her phone RIGHT after you opened then she wasn't very receptive at all and you're wrong about thinking she was keen when you opened. However if there was a time period where she wasn't looking at her phone after you opened then you probably showed to much interest in her too fast - it may be that she started looking at her phone when you first touched her. If that's what happened you didn't qualify or screen her enough before you starting touching her. When a girl suddenly starts doing something like showing negative body language or looking at her phone is this case you've probably shown too much interest - so try to figure out what your mistake actually was. If this happens to you and you are in the moment don't panic - just mimic her to a certain extend. Good ways to do this is looking away - showing the side of your body to her instead of the front- maybe looking at your phone too or maybe the "bored look". If she doesn't change how she is acting after you do this for a bit in my experience the set is probably a lost cause.
In situations where your not sure what to do try something new.
Skid
Troy, I touched her in her arm. I only touched her for a few seconds two times. The interaction occurred outside, right in front of the cafeteria on campus. It took place outdoors. I'm not entirely good with body language. The interaction went like this: walk up to where she was sitting, said hi to her, told her that she was cute, told her my name and asked for hers. Then we made small talk, attempted to get some deep diving in their. Succeeded a little bit. They were some awkward pauses in there, which I guess is normal for a beginner who's never gotten laid. I should improve on that. Then, after a certain time, I looked at the signs that she was giving me and decided that she wasn't interested so I told her I was leaving and left.
Skids, I saw your post right as I was writing this. There was a period where she wasn't looking at her phone and during that time she was making eye contact with me. She looked down at her phone later, so I started doing the same. Also, I used the same opener "I saw you and I think you are cute" on multiple girls over the past few weeks. Doesn't get more scripted than that.
Skids, I saw your post right as I was writing this. There was a period where she wasn't looking at her phone and during that time she was making eye contact with me. She looked down at her phone later, so I started doing the same. Also, I used the same opener "I saw you and I think you are cute" on multiple girls over the past few weeks. Doesn't get more scripted than that.
- Joined
- Nov 20, 2012
- Messages
- 606
She wasn't interested, just being polite. Interested, you can tell by the look she's giving you, her excitement when she's talking to you, she keeps the conversation going, her body is pointing towards you, she laughs at your stupid jokes, she's all smiles. Shit, even a hard target will show one or two signs of Interest.
She was looking at her phone, hoping you got the hint and left. Your vibe, body language, or tone of voice was off. Thus, the seduction fell flat, keep improving, then you'll get warmer responses...
She was looking at her phone, hoping you got the hint and left. Your vibe, body language, or tone of voice was off. Thus, the seduction fell flat, keep improving, then you'll get warmer responses...
- Joined
- Jan 2, 2015
- Messages
- 1,107
https://www.girlschase.com/content/how-k ... -women-you
https://www.girlschase.com/content/she-i ... definitely
https://www.girlschase.com/content/how-g ... w-interest
https://www.girlschase.com/content/book- ... -likes-you
All four of those articles address how to tell if she's interested. Also, if you open direct, it eliminates the problem altogether. If you open direct and she bites, she's at least open to getting to know you further. If she's not, she'll probably end the interaction.
https://www.girlschase.com/content/she-i ... definitely
https://www.girlschase.com/content/how-g ... w-interest
https://www.girlschase.com/content/book- ... -likes-you
All four of those articles address how to tell if she's interested. Also, if you open direct, it eliminates the problem altogether. If you open direct and she bites, she's at least open to getting to know you further. If she's not, she'll probably end the interaction.