I am ashamed of myself for this one thing. Any ideas to help me?

[trashKENNUT]

I have accept mistakes but

I am ashamed. Ashamed of things being persistent. I am ashamed of things like

1)Ashamed of Criticizing my past teachers
2)Ashamed of Criticizing my past friends
3)Ashamed of labeling people as sheeps even if today i am more aware of it and do it better at stating things.

What triggers this is that I was browsing and wanted to look at a particular religious person, a particular religious women whom she just convert and she is having all this quotations and life changing stuff. I find the irony here is that she was a playboy model whom she admitted herself to being sick of that lifestyle and decided to go conservative/religious, at 27. It rings my bells very high and i smell a common pattern.

I have no problem with girls becoming "angels" when they turn 25 and above. It is how i do handle "black and white thinking" and also empathy towards my fellow human beings when i smell this kind of alarms. I do not want to label such women as bullshit or hypocrite or people who pretend to be successful because she 'suddenly' change, having all this quotations which is what everyone is doing this days. I want to appreciate the fact that i know where i come from. I want to know that i come from a religious school when i was young.

I want to make peace in a way where if anybody ask me about religion or things i do not particularly agree on, I want to talk to people without coming off as authoritative. I want to have an assertive and empathy look towards people. Importantly, I want to accept where i come from.

I prefer not talking this days about this kind of topics. Any ideas?

Zac

 

[Flames]

Empathy is a double edged sword.

You have to put yourself in their shoes. How would you feel living their life, seeing the people they see and doing the things they do day in and day out. It's not that they're doing it 'just because' it's because that's how they feel right now and everyone wants to try something new once in a while, sometimes it sticks or sometimes it feels wrong, that is the nature of experiencing.

Being ashamed of things you've done in the past that your not happy with is normal. You look back and think why was I like that, but that cannot be changed that was how you were then. Recognising your past mistakes just proves how much you've grown.

 

[trashKENNUT]

Flames,

Yea, Empathy is a double edge sword, but i still have problems to slaughter people if they bring shit.

I do not feel religious people or conservative people but i appreciate them because i used to be judgemental like most of them. Religion has verses that promotes "rightheousness" and also "peacefulness". So they kind of confuse too. (They can say whatever they want to protect their religion but i see it as it is, plus i see "why" such verses was stated and historical backgrounds. So i don't just consider one perspective, but seeing all of perspectives)

I can always go back to being religious, as per practice rather than believing it. The reason i am writing this is that i left my religious practice when i was proud of it. I can imagine seeing myself hating Girschase in the same manner because suddenly at a different point in my life, i prefer monogamy or marriage or i fail in getting absolute abundance and Chase Amante 'suddenly' becomes retarded to me only because i no longer needed his value.

So it's a matter of accepting and making peace that this is what i preferred or done last time (for myself), and now i learn, and i do not blame society because you have your journey too. (something like that)

Zac

 

[Drck]

1) Ashamed of Criticizing my past teachers
>>>> Criticizing some things or people is good, as long as it is constructive. It shows that you learned something that is important to you, and now you are thinking about it, finding mistakes and advancing imperfections forward. By critical thinking you learn to categorize into, for example: A was good, B is bad and useless, C can be improved. Then you constructively move forward: Lets get rid of B, keep A and work intensively on C. People who can't criticize can't do that. So criticizing is good and very productive, as long as it is not just based on pure negativity.

2) Ashamed of Criticizing my past friends
>>>> Similarly, criticizing shows your own Growth. You are improving, things and people that you were happy with before are no longer satisfying. You had many friends in the past that were at the same level like you, but you grew. You learned new things, you improved much, and you also realized that your friends were doing some things that were not good, and that they are still doing them. That is why you criticize them, but at the same time you grew even more: Now you realized that criticizing is bad. Well, it is not - as long as the critique remains constructive...

3) Ashamed of labeling people as sheeps even if today i am more aware of it and do it better at stating things
>>>> Yes, you have a lot of guilt and a lot of shame for things that you can't influence and have no power over. But the fact is that most people are followers, whereas there are only limited number of true leaders. Truly leading is very difficult, not everyone can do that. Following is quite easy, most people do follow in this or that area. Being independent of leaders and followers though requires true skills, such as constructive criticism. Your guilt and shame is not really your guilt and shame, those were created in your mind by religious people for many years. Get rid of that guilt and shame, and associated blaming and victim mentality. Move forward, move past these things. Learn to be independent, learn new and constructive ways to be independent of all leaders, and of all followers...

 

[ILoveElla]

I have accept mistakes but

I am ashamed. Ashamed of things being persistent. I am ashamed of things like

1)Ashamed of Criticizing my past teachers
2)Ashamed of Criticizing my past friends
3)Ashamed of labeling people as sheeps even if today i am more aware of it and do it better at stating things.

What triggers this is that I was browsing and wanted to look at a particular religious person, a particular religious women whom she just convert and she is having all this quotations and life changing stuff. I find the irony here is that she was a playboy model whom she admitted herself to being sick of that lifestyle and decided to go conservative/religious, at 27. It rings my bells very high and i smell a common pattern.

I have no problem with girls becoming "angels" when they turn 25 and above. It is how i do handle "black and white thinking" and also empathy towards my fellow human beings when i smell this kind of alarms. I do not want to label such women as bullshit or hypocrite or people who pretend to be successful because she 'suddenly' change, having all this quotations which is what everyone is doing this days. I want to appreciate the fact that i know where i come from. I want to know that i come from a religious school when i was young.

I want to make peace in a way where if anybody ask me about religion or things i do not particularly agree on, I want to talk to people without coming off as authoritative. I want to have an assertive and empathy look towards people. Importantly, I want to accept where i come from.

I prefer not talking this days about this kind of topics. Any ideas?

Zac

Bit of an unusual post if you don't mind me saying so. Rather unusual things to be ashamed about!!!!!!!! I wish I had your problems!

 

[trashKENNUT]

Drck, Everyone,

I do not want so to speak "spit on my plate too much". I learn that i will criticize people. I read your response and Chase noted an answer to me on do not spend time on the internet on negative sites.The thing is in order for me to be better, or that sometimes, i need to sift through and do learn "ugly" stuff. Like how Chase noted on "broken children and broken women".

Just to end this because it just bothers me. Life isn't straightforward. Not saying i am going to be a life saviour but it bothers me because people do not realize this. But i am selfish too.

So for me as a person, i start to wonder. what can i do to change my approach to things in life. Thank you guys for the advice. It's just healing of that cognitive dissonance maybe. It might take years because afterall upbringing does influence you.

Zac

 

[ILoveElla]

Drck, Everyone,

I do not want so to speak "spit on my plate too much". I learn that i will criticize people. I read your response and Chase noted an answer to me on do not spend time on the internet on negative sites.The thing is in order for me to be better, or that sometimes, i need to sift through and do learn "ugly" stuff. Like how Chase noted on "broken children and broken women".

Just to end this because it just bothers me. Life isn't straightforward. Not saying i am going to be a life saviour but it bothers me because people do not realize this. But i am selfish too.

So for me as a person, i start to wonder. what can i do to change my approach to things in life. Thank you guys for the advice. It's just healing of that cognitive dissonance maybe. It might take years because afterall upbringing does influence you.

Zac

Are you going mad? The fact that you're being very vague combined with the fact that you don't write very well makes this a nightmare to read. You can't afford to act as cocky as you do, calling people 'sheep' with writing this bad!

 

[trashKENNUT]

ILoveella,

Yea I do write as bad. This community knows it. Hell..even Chase knows it. It also down to language barriers

But

Let me clear this up.

Wrone: I don't call people sheeps.
Right: I THINK OF PEOPLE AS SHEEPS. And this bothers anyone who is self aware after learning a certain level of experience.

I can tell you this. I am very well like by my peers. Sometimes I feel like I am playing a "PG character" in a movie. If you do not know what PG means, it means Parental Guardian. LOLX

That said,

I have a lot of personal healing in terms of not wanting to criticize my past teachers or experiences. It is that difficult to separate "black and white thinking" and learning that the world is not really as straightforward as what religious people/anti government/mis-informed people think.

Really, thanks for all advice. Criticism are highly important.

Zac

 

[ILoveElla]

It's sheep, not "sheeps". It doesn't bother me that I sometimes look upon people as sheep. I find it amusing!!!!!

 

[trashKENNUT]

ILoveElla,

It's sheep, not "sheeps". It doesn't bother me that I sometimes look upon people as sheep. I find it amusing!!!!!

Yea... it can be fun. I am not saying that it isn't. I want to look beyond that, there are other people whom we labeled so fast or that we give advice without even knowing who they are, where they come from, or actually learn from them.

Kind of like me asking for advice here, but i didn't handle my writing well and it pisses you off. It's the same thing. because you have a belief that i do not have the right to be cocky because my work doesn't reflect who i am. But you don't know me yet. So again, it's the same thing as above.

I want to look beyond that.

Zac

 

[Drck]

Life can be like a vicious cycle. You try to change something that bothers you so you develop certain thoughts followed by certain behavior. These thoughts and behavior are not bringing you the desired change though, but at the same time they make you relatively satisfied because you think you are on the right path. But you are not, which brings you to even bigger frustration, yet at the same time you are persisting on the same thoughts and behavior that makes you feel satisfied. You just can't get away from that cycle, instead you are repeating the same thoughts and the same behavior over and over, thinking that one day you will finally break through...

Things could be very easy or very difficult, depending on how you look at them. Seduction can be very frustrating for most guys because we get results right there, on the spot and in our face. Being denied by one girl after another can be really frustrating. It hurts, it shoots our ego down, so our brain naturally develops defense mechanisms to avoid more pain.

Some guys fall in denial, others in depression, another ones just gave up. Some develop different strategies and games but don't do anything; others overanalyze their entire life, another ones intellectualize and rationalize every single aspect of seduction and create some weird and incomprehensible theories. And the brain is just running and running in a circle, but the guy is not really moving anywhere.

But see, it doesn't really have to be that difficult. Girls are just girls, they are humans, by default they already like guys and they are receptive to guys. They naturally like to share things, they love good feelings and pleasure, and sex is their nature. They don't really look for sophisticated ways to get together with a guy, sometimes simplicity is the best the guy can do...

It's like a car. Sometimes you sit in it and hit the pedal all the way to the floor, expecting that it will move. The logic tells you that it should because the motor is running. But nothing happens, only the motor is squealing in high RPM. You can keep the pedal to the floor if you wish, but it won't move. To change it, all you have to do is simply release your floor, shift the gear, and just gently press the pedal. The car will start moving, it is a nature of that car to move, and nothing else needs to be done...

The Same with religion. Some things are great, such as acceptance, forgiveness and humbleness. Other things like guilt and shame are just useless garbage, trash that needs to be thrown away...

 

[Drck]

It's sheep, not "sheeps". It doesn't bother me that I sometimes look upon people as sheep. I find it amusing!!!!!

When I was learning English grammar I used to write sheeple, LOL

 

[trashKENNUT]

Drck, all

Life can be like a vicious cycle. You try to change something that bothers you so you develop certain thoughts followed by certain behavior. These thoughts and behavior are not bringing you the desired change though, but at the same time they make you relatively satisfied because you think you are on the right path. But you are not, which brings you to even bigger frustration, yet at the same time you are persisting on the same thoughts and behavior that makes you feel satisfied. You just can't get away from that cycle, instead you are repeating the same thoughts and the same behavior over and over, thinking that one day you will finally break through...

IT's not that it is harder to break through. Because i have done my research and try it on myself. Since Chase confirm it recently indirectly on energy states, this makes me more determined. IT's more to persistence and repeating it.

Object + Feeling/Love/Hate = is an energy/state/belief that cycles. That is why your first impression is important too. Because people form your energy straight away. Lastly, Energy cannot be created or destroyed. So everything already exist. It takes awhile to put end results in your head to create a similar like results in reality. We are conditioned from school to do things differently, inefficient if i would say at times.

Just my thoughts.

It's like a car. Sometimes you sit in it and hit the pedal all the way to the floor, expecting that it will move. The logic tells you that it should because the motor is running. But nothing happens, only the motor is squealing in high RPM. You can keep the pedal to the floor if you wish, but it won't move. To change it, all you have to do is simply release your floor, shift the gear, and just gently press the pedal. The car will start moving, it is a nature of that car to move, and nothing else needs to be done...

Yea, sometimes we forgot that the breaks is still on.

When I was learning English grammar I used to write sheeple, LOL

To summarize this, Haha. http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/20 ... 114517.htm / Herd mentality.

Guess we not so bright afterall maybe.

Zac