I asked when she has some time. She said "I think next week Im free" how to go?

[razir110]

Hi everyone.

So I got the number from this girl in a restaurant (She works there) I said we should have a coffee and she immediately offered her number I didn't even ask for it.

So I texted her with a playful opening and she gave me a dry reply. So I just shot it and asked when she has some time. She took a day to reply saying "I think I will be free next week" So should I ask like "is it ok Monday?" or should I play uninterested like "ok cool them let me know ones you have the details"?

Cause during our interaction she seemed really interested and I've seen her there a few times in the restaurant.

So what is your take here? Is she testing me or something? Is this lack of interest? How to best reply to this?

Thanks!

**UPDATE** I just replied "what about next wednesday?" I'll just take the initiative here, cause she seems to be into setting the date and not beating around the bush.
She replied "I'm not sure about that, but we will talk" so this is not good. Strange hein? She gives me her number, seems keen to meet and now this. I replied "cool let me know then"

I'd still appreciate your input on what to do in these situations.

 

[Ergon]

Re: I asked when she has some time. She said "I think next week Im free" how to

A simple first text usually works fine. Being playful may come across as trying hard for her to respond. But that's OK. You asking her when's she's free is not very decisive; usually works better if you add one or two times she can decide from. But she still seems up for meeting. I'd text back something more assured now like:

Cool, how about Monday at 7? I know this cozy little cafe near xyz we can check out.

Or along those lines. If she suggest something else, accept if it's convenient for you, otherwise propose something that does.

 

[razir110]

Re: I asked when she has some time. She said "I think next week Im free" how to

Ergon,

Cool, but what if when I offer her the time on first request she says "im not free that day" and offers no alternative? I think it gets me into danger of "missing" the day she is available. So by asking her when she is free I would give her the total freedom to select the most convenient date right? Plus I am acting as non-controlling, she has a lot of freedom here and its easy non-pushy on her.

I think this is the general advice here on GC.

Also, about the no-alternative reply from her side. Is this always a rejection? Our should I shoot again in a few days if she doesn't suggest a time? Because it seems to me unlikely that a woman will actually text me a few days later offering the date. Plus her last text ended with "..we will talk" so the ball is clearly on her side now, I can't push it more from my side.

What u think?

 

[Witcher]

Re: I asked when she has some time. She said "I think next week Im free" how to

All your answers can be found here, and much more:
viewtopic.php?f=3&t=16305

 

[Ergon]

Re: I asked when she has some time. She said "I think next week Im free" how to

You don't say it in a controlling way. It's usually like:

"Cool, cool... Well let's grab that coffee soon Thurs night or Sat afternoon is best for me. What days work for you?"

(Copy pasted from NarrowJ)

She then agrees to either time or suggest another. If she doesn't she risk being a bit rude.
You could still reply "ok. Well, we'll see later"

And then after a few days try again "Hey HB123 How's that schedule looking?"

 

[razir110]

Re: I asked when she has some time. She said "I think next week Im free" how to

@Witcher and everyone

So do you think that by saying "ok cool LET ME KNOW" I gave up control of the situation?

It is true that girls never actually come back with the invite. So I will have to re engage after a few days. In this scenario I will be chasing because I told her to com back and she didn't so now I am going against what I said and re engaging myself? Is this very bad?.. Pff silly..

What if I actually stick to my word and don't say anything, since she is the one that has to talk now? Is it reasonable to expect her to come back to me? Or girls never do that? Should I talk to her again in a few days anyways?

The way I see this is that by telling her "to let me know," I raised the stakes to the max and now if I am the one to actually speak if she doesn't say anything, I will lose.

Correct?

 

[Fuck This]

Re: I asked when she has some time. She said "I think next week Im free" how to

"Hey I always grab coffee after class at XYZ, how about you join me Wednesday night?" implying, "I'm going anyway and I'm offering you the chance to join me..."

The cool thing about that is that even if she refuses, it doesn't change you plan, and you show your independence....