A
Anonymous
Guest
Here's an interaction I had on a recent night on Tinder. Most of my Tinder interactions go something like this.
The girl was 19. I'm 24. The whole interaction took place over the span of 2 to 3 hours.
Me: Hey (HerName), I can tell just by looking at you that we'd make some really attractive babies.
Her: Hahaha is that so?
[note: she answered almost immediately]
Me: Yep. They're gonna grow up to be supermodels. All 17 of them.
Her: Wow 17!? That's a lot of kids!!
Me: Yeah, I'm pretty frisky. Once I get started it's hard to stop
Her: hahah no problem
Me: I guess I better know a little more about you before we make all those babies though. Can I ask you a question?
Her: sure!
Me: what's your number
Her: (number)
Then, on text:
Me: Hey (hername), it's idklol from tinder. I felt like we were too cool for that silly app.
Her: Hey idklol! haha yeah totally
Me: (hername) what makes you different from all those other silly tinderellas?
Her: I can show you better than I can tell you Hahah just kidding! But who knows. I just try to be a free spirit and make things count.
Me: Oh yeah? That's cool. I might go for a demonstration What's a free spirit like you up to tonight?
Her: Hahah I'm actually sick so I'm staying in tonight. How bout you?
Me: Just sittin here chillin and drinkin beer. Also a little bit high
Her: Haha cool! I used to smoke
Me: Cool. Why'd you stop?
Her: It's not worth my health later on
Me: Wow, so responsible (hername)
Her: Haha thanks yeah I try to live a healthy lifestyle
Me: Me too. That will be really helpful when we have 18 kids together
Her: Oh yeah, they'll be in tip top shape. Haha what's your last name by the way?
Me: Hasareallybigd...I mean it's (my last name)
Her: Hahaha mine's (name)
Me: Okay (her full name) I kind of like the sound of that!
Her: Haha thanks It's pronounced (explanation)
Me: Okay I'll remember that so I can pronounce it right when we meet up for coffee
Her: Hahah oh we're meeting up for coffee are we?
Me: Yep. You're gonna buy me a peppermint mocha!
Her: Wow I'm so generous!!
Me: I know. That's one of the reasons why I picked you to raise my 19 kids
Her: I like the way you think!
Me: Thanks! I like the way you look. Now we just have to decide when you're buying me a peppermint mocha. I'm free tomorrow and tuesday
Her: Well my schedule is kind of hectic because I'm part of a musical
[note: this is where things went downhill. She's avoiding a meetup? I didn't want to validate her objection so I tried to change the subject]
Me: Hmm, and we also have to figure out what drink I'm gonna buy you!
Her: Well I don't drink coffee or soda so anything else would be lovely
Me: Hmm....beer? Wine? Prune juice?
Her: Haha well Im 19 so I don't know if anyone would serve me hahah
Me: Aww, I'd serve you a nice glass of prune juice. Or a beer. I've got a bunch of those in the fridge.
(silence, half hour later)
Me: You don't have to worry about your age either. It's cool to drink prune juice now
and that was the end of it.
The next afternoon I sent her a text.
Me: Hey (name)! Feeling better today?
No response. A while after that I logged on to Tinder and noticed that she unmatched me there. Earlier that day before I asked if she was feeling better, we were still matched. So she apparently unmatched me as a response to asking if she's feeling better...
Really, I wouldn't bother to post each and every crappy tinder interaction but I'm having this problem a LOT. I open the girl, we're flirting and having fun, I get her number, text some more, invite her to meet up and everything goes silent and she won't answer again no matter what. Moving too fast? I fucked up? Girl's looking for a texting buddy? It gets so frustrating.
The girl was 19. I'm 24. The whole interaction took place over the span of 2 to 3 hours.
Me: Hey (HerName), I can tell just by looking at you that we'd make some really attractive babies.
Her: Hahaha is that so?
[note: she answered almost immediately]
Me: Yep. They're gonna grow up to be supermodels. All 17 of them.
Her: Wow 17!? That's a lot of kids!!
Me: Yeah, I'm pretty frisky. Once I get started it's hard to stop
Her: hahah no problem
Me: I guess I better know a little more about you before we make all those babies though. Can I ask you a question?
Her: sure!
Me: what's your number
Her: (number)
Then, on text:
Me: Hey (hername), it's idklol from tinder. I felt like we were too cool for that silly app.
Her: Hey idklol! haha yeah totally
Me: (hername) what makes you different from all those other silly tinderellas?
Her: I can show you better than I can tell you
Hahah just kidding! But who knows. I just try to be a free spirit and make things count.Me: Oh yeah? That's cool. I might go for a demonstration
What's a free spirit like you up to tonight?Her: Hahah I'm actually sick so I'm staying in tonight. How bout you?
Me: Just sittin here chillin and drinkin beer. Also a little bit high
Her: Haha cool! I used to smoke
Me: Cool. Why'd you stop?
Her: It's not worth my health later on
Me: Wow, so responsible (hername)
Her: Haha thanks yeah I try to live a healthy lifestyle
Me: Me too. That will be really helpful when we have 18 kids together
Her: Oh yeah, they'll be in tip top shape. Haha what's your last name by the way?
Me: Hasareallybigd...I mean it's (my last name)
Her: Hahaha mine's (name)
Me: Okay (her full name) I kind of like the sound of that!
Her: Haha thanks
It's pronounced (explanation)Me: Okay I'll remember that so I can pronounce it right when we meet up for coffee
Her: Hahah oh we're meeting up for coffee are we?
Me: Yep. You're gonna buy me a peppermint mocha!
Her: Wow I'm so generous!!
Me: I know. That's one of the reasons why I picked you to raise my 19 kids
Her: I like the way you think!
Me: Thanks! I like the way you look. Now we just have to decide when you're buying me a peppermint mocha. I'm free tomorrow and tuesday
Her: Well my schedule is kind of hectic because I'm part of a musical
[note: this is where things went downhill. She's avoiding a meetup? I didn't want to validate her objection so I tried to change the subject]
Me: Hmm, and we also have to figure out what drink I'm gonna buy you!
Her: Well I don't drink coffee or soda so anything else would be lovely
Me: Hmm....beer? Wine? Prune juice?
Her: Haha well Im 19 so I don't know if anyone would serve me hahah
Me: Aww, I'd serve you a nice glass of prune juice. Or a beer. I've got a bunch of those in the fridge.
(silence, half hour later)
Me: You don't have to worry about your age either. It's cool to drink prune juice now
and that was the end of it.
The next afternoon I sent her a text.
Me: Hey (name)! Feeling better today?
No response. A while after that I logged on to Tinder and noticed that she unmatched me there. Earlier that day before I asked if she was feeling better, we were still matched. So she apparently unmatched me as a response to asking if she's feeling better...
Really, I wouldn't bother to post each and every crappy tinder interaction but I'm having this problem a LOT. I open the girl, we're flirting and having fun, I get her number, text some more, invite her to meet up and everything goes silent and she won't answer again no matter what. Moving too fast? I fucked up? Girl's looking for a texting buddy? It gets so frustrating.
