FU I Shall Overcome

[Zoro]

Despite failing on the follow through, I feel fantastic about what just happened. I proved to myself I am making progress.

So,
I went to the grocery store. Along the way my thoughts were on masculinity and how its more productive to be focused, and determined rather than emotional. The whole goofy vs serious thing. Whatevs. The grocery store is one place where I tend to see cute girls so I am looking forward to the possibilities.

Praise thy gods of glory, because as I pull up to my parking spot, I see a girl, so sexy that I came right there and then.

Just kidding, but there was a girl and she was sexy. In fact, my personal favorite type of girl.

She's walking towards her car. I have only moments to spare here.

I don't hesitate, exit my car and walk straight for her. Finally just going for it. I'm hungry and she's my dinner. I plan on telling her she is very cute and I had to meet her or else I would have regretted it later.

My prey is alerted to my oncoming presence, obviously about to approach her. Imagine the way a impala perks up when they notice a Cheetah. lol

She disappears in between the cars, I assume to hop in her car. This is where my ego steps in, "Whoa, are you going to walk up her car like a weirdo. It seems like she scuttled away too" I listen to this and change direction.

Shaking a little.

My ego shaking, but I'm smiling. I was close. I know if I would have just disregarded that silly thought and continued being bold and unhesitating, there is a good chance I would have walked away with her number. I normally get warm receptions, can hold a conversation and when I do get a number, its usually solid. I just need to stop freezing up!

I hope this is not hard to relate to. Overcoming hesitation and fear has been a sticking point for me for a while, and this small point where I took action straight from my car and was geared up is a victory for me. Next time I bet it will be easier to disregard those reservations.

Even though my ego won this round, I feel like I gave it a solid punch in the jaw. :}

PS

I did come on pretty strong by walking right towards her, but I think if I would have just sustained that dominant frame and been direct yet relaxed/chill (which was my plan) I think it would have been well received.

What do you guys think?

 

[Smurf]

I get that feeling a lot man!

It's awesome that you're acting on your instincts, don't give your ego time to figure out what's going on. I might've yelled at her from where I was to get her attention, because just coming toward her knowing you have a time crunch might come off a bit weird to her. So maybe I'd yell, and then come up with something completely random indirect, like, "hey, did you drop something over there?" And then when she responds, "haha, I'm kidding, I just thought you were cute and had to meet you."

Great that you're putting your ego in check, I'm working on the same thing. Today at the gym I was talking to a girl in the sauna, and she had a guy with her, so I was scared to go direct. It's also hard to go direct in the gym that I go to often, but I was totally pussying out because she was into me at some level.

We just gotta rip our egos to shreds

Jake.

 

[HellAtlantic]

I don't think it has anything to do with ego. It's more "this girl probably thinks I either want to steal her car or her purse in a parking lot, she's probably not going to want to be approached because she's on alert." I wouldn't have even thought to approach so you're already braver than me for thinking about it. I tend to approach and talk to girls strictly and mainly in bars or the complex where I work. Mostly bars though. At work I'm just super friendly. I prefer to approach girls in places where they're already expecting to get approached because while they might have their guard up when a stranger approaches them at a bar it's expected. So they're more at ease in a bar setting than parking lot. But you're braver than me.

 

[Zoro]

HellAtlantic,

I don't think it has anything to do with ego. It's more "this girl probably thinks I either want to steal her car or her purse in a parking lot, she's probably not going to want to be approached because she's on alert."

The ego is what comes up with those thoughts.

Where approaches are unexpected, letting her know why you are talking to her (she's cute and I didn't want to sit by while she walked out my life) will help her be at ease.