- Joined
- Jul 17, 2013
- Messages
- 1,539
Okay fellas, here's a confusing one. I saw a girl today I vaguely know... previously, I could feel she liked me but the environment was a socially "forbidden" one (not work—even more taboo than that) so I didn't push things, just used to flirt lightly and act outcome independent.
I haven't seen her for a while in that environment, then this evening at around 9 PM I spot her in the supermarket. Say hello, compliment her on her hair that she's obviously recently had recolored. Ask if she's still doing the job where I met her, she says yes but she's reduced her hours and works only mornings. I start to deep-dive a little about what she wants to do.
She lights up and kinda keeps hanging around me when the normal social thing to do would be to say "Nice seeing you again" and proceed with grocery shopping. Soon after, I tell her she's looking really great and spontaneously cheek-kiss her, which she likes.
I've never had a chance for a proper conversation in the formal environment, so I ask her whether she studies alongside her day job, adding "You look pretty young". Next thing, she's qualifying herself on her age, saying that her hairdresser couldn't believe it when she told her she was 28, said she looked 23, etc. And no she's not studying. She won't move until I do, so I start moving and she trails me.
Then she starts picking out avocados and I warn her "Sure, if you can find one soft enough". Immediately she complains "No, they're all hard" and heads to the neighboring section where she starts looking over ready-made guacamole: "I think I'll just get this, it'll be easier anyway". Meantime I find a reasonably ripe one and hold it up for her to see. She comes back to me, checks it, says "Yes, that'll last me longer", accepts it, and goes back and replaces the guacamole—again post-justifying her actions, subtle compliance it seems.
After this she hangs around me for a bit and qualifies me on something from my own life.
I start heading in the bakery direction and am amused to note she walks with me. At this point I'm thinking: "To hell with social taboos!" and I ask her out.
She starts prevaricating a bit, saying she's made a conscious decision for her own reasons not to see anyone just now, blah blah, but her body language is telling me a different story. I just wait and let her fizzle out. Then I say: "Well, why don't you just give me your cell phone number?"
She starts dictating her email address and asks nervously: "Is that all right?" I don't exactly roll my eyes but I give her one of Chase's looks... not sure if it's the skeptical one or the "Okaaaaay" one, anyway it does the trick. She says "I can give you my card", rummages in her purse and produces it... naturally it has her cell phone number on it.
So here's the question. Do I send an icebreaker tonight, say around 11 PM, à la cold approach, something like: "Good chatting tonight, J! Hope the avocado was ripe
"—to cement what pretty obviously seemed like good feelings?
Or do the circumstances warrant waiting longer?
Thanks
-Marty
I haven't seen her for a while in that environment, then this evening at around 9 PM I spot her in the supermarket. Say hello, compliment her on her hair that she's obviously recently had recolored. Ask if she's still doing the job where I met her, she says yes but she's reduced her hours and works only mornings. I start to deep-dive a little about what she wants to do.
She lights up and kinda keeps hanging around me when the normal social thing to do would be to say "Nice seeing you again" and proceed with grocery shopping. Soon after, I tell her she's looking really great and spontaneously cheek-kiss her, which she likes.
I've never had a chance for a proper conversation in the formal environment, so I ask her whether she studies alongside her day job, adding "You look pretty young". Next thing, she's qualifying herself on her age, saying that her hairdresser couldn't believe it when she told her she was 28, said she looked 23, etc. And no she's not studying. She won't move until I do, so I start moving and she trails me.
Then she starts picking out avocados and I warn her "Sure, if you can find one soft enough". Immediately she complains "No, they're all hard" and heads to the neighboring section where she starts looking over ready-made guacamole: "I think I'll just get this, it'll be easier anyway". Meantime I find a reasonably ripe one and hold it up for her to see. She comes back to me, checks it, says "Yes, that'll last me longer", accepts it, and goes back and replaces the guacamole—again post-justifying her actions, subtle compliance it seems.
After this she hangs around me for a bit and qualifies me on something from my own life.
I start heading in the bakery direction and am amused to note she walks with me. At this point I'm thinking: "To hell with social taboos!" and I ask her out.
She starts prevaricating a bit, saying she's made a conscious decision for her own reasons not to see anyone just now, blah blah, but her body language is telling me a different story. I just wait and let her fizzle out. Then I say: "Well, why don't you just give me your cell phone number?"
She starts dictating her email address and asks nervously: "Is that all right?" I don't exactly roll my eyes but I give her one of Chase's looks... not sure if it's the skeptical one or the "Okaaaaay" one, anyway it does the trick. She says "I can give you my card", rummages in her purse and produces it... naturally it has her cell phone number on it.
So here's the question. Do I send an icebreaker tonight, say around 11 PM, à la cold approach, something like: "Good chatting tonight, J! Hope the avocado was ripe
"—to cement what pretty obviously seemed like good feelings?Or do the circumstances warrant waiting longer?
Thanks
-Marty
