If girl is excited on 1st date, how to manage autorejection?

[perpetualsun]

Hey Guys! I had a coffee date with a girl today. At first things were a bit awkward but I was able to deep dive once I found an opening and it ended up that after around 40 minutes, she was pretty much opening herself up. It was about 10 minutes before my class so I suggested we leave then. I could tell that she really didn't want to leave as when I asked her:

"Hey, so wanna get going? I have to go to class and you have work",

she asked me what time it was and I could sense she wanted to stay there. Right after we got up, I could sense her excited state tone down just a bit (she may have been trying to self-protect). When we got outside the cafe, she kinda try to hang around before I just said "bye, thanks for getting coffee with me!" and left. Now, I know that chase recommends me texting her the next day about how it was good getting coffee with her, then 2-3 days later, contact her again. My only problem is, I am afraid she might go into auto-rejection before then. Would this be a possibility? I obviously want to keep her guessing a bit but in my case, would the 1 day/2-3 day strategy work? Thanks guys!!!

 

[diegoC]

Re: If girl is excited on 1st date, how to manage autoreject

Now, I know that chase recommends me texting her the next day about how it was good getting coffee with her …

Nop. It depends. If you had a coffee with her early/afternoon just text her that same day at night. If the cafe was on the night text her next day (morning, afternoon).

Remember, not everything you read is written in stone. If a girl was completely excited and you text her right away she may be jumping up and down, others may not care that much.

After you text her just wait if she responds or not. If she does, don't get stuck in long conversations on text. Text her back, but try to get out of a conversation. Space out your messages. If she responds right away don't text her the moment you get her message. This way the conversation will naturally end because there are not infinite hours in a day Or just answer with some statement when she responds, for instance:

You: "Hey Bridgette, I had a great time with you at the coffee. Can't believe you didn't leave a tip! Naughty of you…"

Her (45minutes later): "hahaha I also had a good time perpetualsun!"

You (1:30hr later): ""

You might end it this way (I like winky smiles and I also use them in real life, so, it makes sense). If she continues, the same I told you, space time response/statements.

The part I wrote that says "Can't believe you didn't leave a tip! Naughty of you…" is just a way to pick something that happened in the interaction so it lights the text message. She will remember that, hopefully laught a little, you'll make her feel relaxed. Also, in my example I said naughty in a playful way, that's great.

One more thing to note about something you said:

My only problem is, I am afraid she might go into auto-rejection before then.

Repeat these to yourself: If she doesn't want me, others will (or change that for fuck her if you prefer it, jeje).

Yeah, that's right. You should always have abundace mentality (take a look at this post that covers that and more).

If you believe that you have a lots of options out there you will be more relaxed in your interactions. Of course you would love to make all the girls you like your lovers, who wouldn't? But you have to know that you will blow it. Even guys here that are good with girls still do.
So, just get in the state of mind of not even carrying. And, when you meet someone, continue meeting more so when it blows with her (it will) you have others in line: it makes it easier to give a shit when you have options.

The other day I went out with a girl and on the date I actually came out as a nice guy (I was trying other stuff, I didn't push for other things, well, that's what happened). I know I'm now a friend or boyfriend material. I replied to a message she sent me (to watch a movie) telling her that this time I wouldn't behave. She "didn't understand". Eventually she told me that I have to behave or she will punch me. I won't write all the messages but her answers really assured me that I was not in the lover category (if I'm mistaken I don't even care. I rather meet new girls than go out with her to see what happens). I don't want to expend my money (and I wasn't even considering paying for her ticket and treats) to see a girl that is going to be just my friend or maybe become my girlfriend (depending what label she has put on me) when I know I didn't set the right expectations to her (that I am a guy that is not a friend/boyfriend material, that I want to be with her).

And, you know something? I don't even fucking care. Now, I'm having a date this Saturday with an even hotter one. I really hope I do okay, if not, FUCK IT. There are to many girls out there. Different kind of beauties with different personalities. Don't get hung up!

Remember: If she doesn't want me, others will/fuck her

Cheers!