If my goal is a relationship...

[TheWiseFool]

After reading Chase's ebook and a ton of articles here on Girls Chase, I have to ask, "What if my goal is to not get intimate with a girl as quickly as possible but to enter into a relationship and keep a stable one at that?"

I've read the articles regarding relationships and what I took as the message from all of them is that one must possess all the values of a lover, provider, and a friend. That is a hefty calling, but if that is what it takes to keep a woman in a relationship, then so be it. However, I am more concerned with getting to the relationship itself. I like to ask "Why?" questions all the time. The why question that has been sitting in the back of my head is, If I am looking for a relationship, why do I NEED to start it off sleeping with her as fast as possible? Is there a more effective pathway or is this just the one that works best, currently. For any of the men here on the forums who have any relationship experience, could you please provide me with information as to how you and your current as well as past girlfriends ended up together? What kept the relationship going and what caused you and her to break up (if you can remember or feel comfortable posting)? Was it you or her? If you slept early with a woman who turned into a girlfriend, how long did the relationship last? How about if you slept with them after 2-3 dates? 4-+4 dates? Also another question I need to ask is after you slept with them, what steps did you take to get to the point where you asked her to be your girlfriend or partner and how did that go?

Thank you for taking the time to read and I appreciate any help I can get here!

- The Wise Fool

 

[Franco]

TWF,

There's a lot of articles on this website that cover the reasons of why you should sleep with a girl early into meeting her even if you want a relationship, but there is one that is devoted more to that topic:

Dating Without Sex: Why It Usually Doesn't Work

In general, there are a few main ideas as to why you should sleep with a girl as quickly as possible if you want to be in a relationship with her:

• 1) Sleeping with her quickly is actually your best chance of getting her into a relationship. Sleeping with her quickly avoids a host of bad things (including getting friendzoned) that happen when you don't move quickly, and they can often lead to never being able to be in a relationship with that woman.
  
  2) Sleeping with her quickly sets the tone for the entire relationship: you are a strong, powerful man that she should respect and look up to. The quicker you sleep with her, the more she will respect you in the relationship as a powerful man who gets what he wants, and she'll be much less likely to disrepect you during the relationship since she always views you that way. You'll essentially be the "one-up" in the relationship, which is where you want to be.
  
  3) All women love sex. This is something every guy should understand. By not offering her sex, you aren't satisfying her deepest, primal desire. Sex is an amazing thing, and women often crave good sex even more than men do. So there is no reason not to give her the thing she wants from a genuine "man" the most.

The best way to find out why having sex quickly is so vital to a relationship is to go out and try it yourself. Test the results of having sex with a woman early versus having sex with a woman late into a relationship. You'll likely notice the difference in the way each woman will treat you.

- Franco

 

[TheWiseFool]

Thank you Franco for the link.

Side note: I also thought about the Boyfriend Dilemma and remembered the example about the love triangle, the guy who puts in the least amount of effort but gets to the same destination ultimately wins in the end.

I am glad Chase stressed religion, Catholocism /Christianity, as well as biology because they are two fields I am well versed in and find conflicting in my decisions regarding dating and sex. After all the facts and theory it ultimately comes down to my PERCEPTION AND CHOICE of dating and sex (and all decisions I make in general). I can read all I want but I need to choose a side in this inner battle between letting go of who I am currently and accepting and growing into my potential self. The battle between loving Christ and following science. The battle between regret and not regretting. The battle between believing in eternity after this life or life, as a human, for but a brief moment in the ongoing story of our universe. Dichotomies, dichotomies, upon dichotomies haha.

Thanks again,
The Wise Fool