- Joined
- May 25, 2019
- Messages
- 129
Even though I got several glances from various folks (men and women), I felt a bit awkward today. I walked through town for half an hour or so before I found the courage to talk to a woman. I had only passed up two opportunities that I considered worthwhile, though. This was probably a Japanese woman. She wasn't even that cute, but I decided it was time to talk to someone. I approached her from the side, and asked her if she spoke Dutch. She said "no" in a dismissive tone while continuing her walk, and she looked away, so I gathered she wasn't interested. Maybe the approach wasn't right? I still have trouble opening these kinds of women. They're so shy that they're too easily scared and don't want to be approached by strangers on the street. I still keep trying because this effect is only there with Japanese women who did not grow up in the West. And who knows, maybe at some point I'll crack the code on how to approach them 
I was a little disappointed and walked on. Then I went for lunch because I noticed I was getting lightheaded and less grounded, which is really not a good headspace in which to be approaching women. After lunch I walked on and noticed a woman with earbuds in who crossed my path. I thought she might be doing that on purpose and I thought she had an interesting look about her. She sat down and I sat down next to her and started talking to her. She did not respond. I waved my hand in her peripheral vision and said "can you hear me?" and she still did not even acknowledge my existence. I said "ok, suit yourself" and got up. I'm not going to be treated like this by a woman, but it still got me somewhat irritated/disappointed. I decided I did not want to lose heart so I kept going. I browsed a book shop for a bit to relax. Then I continued.
Finally I saw a girl that I really liked the look of, so I approached. I felt much more into it with her. I toled her my usual line that she looked cute and she said thank you. Then she looked on her phone and excused herself. She had a movie to catch. I briefly considered asking for her number but decided against it. I told her it's too bad and I didn't want to make her miss the movie. I told her it was nice to meet her and she reciprocated, shaking my hand. Then she left. I
felt great about this interaction even though it got me nothing.
I did some more shopping. At one store there was an absolutely stunning girl working. I did not drool over her but kept my composure and tried to make a joke. The customers who were before me were asking about a loyalty card and they only had an app, but the people were from a neighbouring country. So my joke was something about that I considered it interesting that the app didn't work in their country. Either she didn't get the joke, or she wasn't interested. She went into the topic seriously.
At the next store there was another female cashier, and I asked her where to put the clothes I had bought. I had a smile and made great eye contact. I think she felt this as she was making a bit more small talk than strictly necessary. She asked me if I usually bought this brand of pants. I told her no it's the first time. I got one joke in and she laughed a bit. The way she smiled when she said goodbye told me she was interested. I could've asked for her number but I chickened out/didn't really find a good way to work it in.
In retrospect, I think I have trouble with the ambiguity of such situations. This is probably why I kind of like direct approaches during the day with women I don't know: it's scary as hell, but it's also unambiguous and relatively low risk, considering I'll probably never see the woman again.
I was a little disappointed and walked on. Then I went for lunch because I noticed I was getting lightheaded and less grounded, which is really not a good headspace in which to be approaching women. After lunch I walked on and noticed a woman with earbuds in who crossed my path. I thought she might be doing that on purpose and I thought she had an interesting look about her. She sat down and I sat down next to her and started talking to her. She did not respond. I waved my hand in her peripheral vision and said "can you hear me?" and she still did not even acknowledge my existence. I said "ok, suit yourself" and got up. I'm not going to be treated like this by a woman, but it still got me somewhat irritated/disappointed. I decided I did not want to lose heart so I kept going. I browsed a book shop for a bit to relax. Then I continued.
Finally I saw a girl that I really liked the look of, so I approached. I felt much more into it with her. I toled her my usual line that she looked cute and she said thank you. Then she looked on her phone and excused herself. She had a movie to catch. I briefly considered asking for her number but decided against it. I told her it's too bad and I didn't want to make her miss the movie. I told her it was nice to meet her and she reciprocated, shaking my hand. Then she left. I
felt great about this interaction even though it got me nothing.
I did some more shopping. At one store there was an absolutely stunning girl working. I did not drool over her but kept my composure and tried to make a joke. The customers who were before me were asking about a loyalty card and they only had an app, but the people were from a neighbouring country. So my joke was something about that I considered it interesting that the app didn't work in their country. Either she didn't get the joke, or she wasn't interested. She went into the topic seriously.
At the next store there was another female cashier, and I asked her where to put the clothes I had bought. I had a smile and made great eye contact. I think she felt this as she was making a bit more small talk than strictly necessary. She asked me if I usually bought this brand of pants. I told her no it's the first time. I got one joke in and she laughed a bit. The way she smiled when she said goodbye told me she was interested. I could've asked for her number but I chickened out/didn't really find a good way to work it in.
In retrospect, I think I have trouble with the ambiguity of such situations. This is probably why I kind of like direct approaches during the day with women I don't know: it's scary as hell, but it's also unambiguous and relatively low risk, considering I'll probably never see the woman again.
