I'll have my first lay in a week... which is also my first time at all. Tips?

[onlyshallow]

Hey guys,

I'll have my first lay in about a week, but it's kind of an odd scenario and I'd like to get some feedback from you guys on how I should proceed.
Two weeks ago, one of my good friends tells me that he gave my number to this girl he sometimes hangs out with (they're not lovers, he's a virgin and always ends up in the friendzone because he hides the banana lol) would like to hook up with me. He also tells me she's a virgin too, and that she never kissed a guy (she's 18, about to turn 19). Thing is, I know the girl because we had a class together during the last year of HS, and even though she is kinda cute, we never talked because she just doesn't talk a lot, very shy girl. Anyway, she texted me 3 days ago and we set up something saturday the 12th. I'll still link the text conversation because maybe it tells something about the approach I should have once she's at my house. Here it goes:

Her: Hi, I've been wanting to talk to you for a while but I'm shy so I got a phone. It's XYZ
Me: Yeah I remember you. Listen, I'm not much of a texting guy, so we could go get some coffee, just tell me when you're free and I'll see if it can fit into my schedule
Her: Sounds good! I'm free sunday and monday. If you're not available that day, it could be later
Me: I'm busy (for real I was) on those days, but I'm free saturday the 12th!
Her: Aight hopefully I don't have a shift that day, I'll let you know as soon as I get my schedule for next week!
Her (a day after): I'm free all day on the 12th!!!
Me: Cool, see you soon XYZ
Her: (emoticon of a flower)


So, given those circumstances, how should I interact with her without having it being awkward since we never had a conversation before? How much time should I take before escalating? And HOW should I escalate?

 

[Big Daddy]

Re: I'll have my first lay in a week... which is also my first time at all. Tips

Dude, just go there and ask her anything to get the shit rollin. Banter about how she's a female PUA (but please phrase it differently) that she got your number. Deep dive her and relate on some of her stories. Plant the seed for the pull, telling about some pics you have home or asking about a movie she'd love to watch yet didn't. Going deeper and deeper and directing the conversation to her shyness.

Then start talking about sexual topics, let the tension build up. By this point it's going to be very awkward to keep there talking about the same shit over and over again, so you ask for the bill, split that motherfucker or just get up and say you're going to show her those pics or watch that movie in case you already paid. Walk or drive to your place, put the movie to roll, then kiss her like this: viewtopic.php?t=1255&p=6826

Another option could be taking everything that's "seatable" from your bedroom so the only place you guys can watch the movie is on your bed. Then go for the kiss. Then escalate from there.

The funny thing about virgins is that they don't hesitate to comply with you. As long as she likes you (she does), you can be very explicit in your commands because she doesn't know how the game is supposed to work so she'll just go along with you. It's going to be a relief for her if you just lead all the way and take that off her shoulders.

If you never did this before, you're going to feel awkward in every moment of this interaction, probably; but then just remember that she doesn't have the slightest idea of how this is supposed to work so she probably isn't even aware that it's "awkward".

 

[Rusty]

Re: I'll have my first lay in a week... which is also my first time at all. Tips

Just relax.

I think most guys treat the experience of seducing a woman as work or a mechanical process. As if they need to hit some benchmarks or make sure they're hitting the switches...

This girl is already into you. She texted you first. She's already the one chasing. All you have to do is not screw it up.

If she's really an inexperienced girl, then you have to lead that much more. She's not going to know how to handle herself. You almost quite literally will have to take her by the hand and show her what's up.

Just chill out, get to know her, deep dive, whatever you need to do to get her more comfortable around you so she herself can relax her nerves a bit. If she's a shy, inexperienced girl, she's going to be very nervous and it's your job to get her to settle down a bit and take control of the interaction. You don't want to be too aggressive; you do need to make sure she's comfortable with your escalation.

Take baby steps. Get her used to your touch right from the jump. Give her a hug when you meet her. Maybe even a kiss on the cheek greeting. Make sure you're leading her physically. Hand on the small of her back. Touch the shoulder/elbow on high points in the conversation. Break the touch barrier fast, and get her comfortable to your touch.

Escalations need to make sense to the girl. If you just randomly go in for the grope, it's awkward and forced. Be in proximity. Touch should feel natural to her and she shouldn't be second guessing your advances. Make sure you sit next to each other, not across from each other if you're having a lunch/coffee/drink date. Sitting across is more "interview" style. Plus, sitting next to each other allows you to break touch barriers by rubbing shoulders and legs/thighs without actively trying to touch her. Incidental touch, if you will.

Experiment with the eye contact. A lot of shy girls have trouble maintaining eye contact. If you bore into her eyes, she might be overwhelmed and get uncomfortable. Make sure you calibrate, see how well she can handle it. Your emotional state is largely transferred through your eyes and tonality of your voice, so make sure you're making solid eye contact, then as you ramp up the conversation and the flow of emotions gets stronger, start giving her more sexy eyes (get into sexual state, imagine doing her, etc.) This will get her state pumping. But don't do this too early on, unless you're ready to pull.

Which brings us to... logistics. Do you have a place? Somewhere with privacy, where you won't be interrupted. This is probably the most important piece.

 

[Raqimus]

Re: I'll have my first lay in a week... which is also my first time at all. Tips

You could just invite her over to hang at your house... saying youll prepare xx there or do xx instead. By xx i mean non sexual that will lead to something sexual. Yea like Rusty and BigD said, just lead her and make things a bit easy for her, also make her feel comfortable. Also practice putting on a condom hahaha. My "first time"(Failed to get it up) I just pulled that mother fucker out and tried to stretch it on my dick hahaha. Girl was like "I don't think thats how its supposed to work."

 

[Big Daddy]

Re: I'll have my first lay in a week... which is also my first time at all. Tips

Girl was like "I don't think thats how its supposed to work."

Hahahahahaha

Yeah man, better practice putting it on before the deed.

 

[onlyshallow]

Re: I'll have my first lay in a week... which is also my first time at all. Tips

Yeah I could just tell her to come at my place for a drink, eventually pulling the move recommended by Big Daddy. For the rest, I'll just have to calibrate I guess. And thanks for the reminder Raqimus! Would definitely be awkward if I was unable to put on the rubber haha! By the way, have you guys tried the condoms that claim a skin-to-skin sensation like these ?? I'm wondering if they're worth the extra bucks

 

[Big Daddy]

Re: I'll have my first lay in a week... which is also my first time at all. Tips

I only use Skyn. I like it better than normal condoms.

As for the skin-to-skin sensation I don't really know because I only had sex with condoms.

 

[onlyshallow]

Re: I'll have my first lay in a week... which is also my first time at all. Tips

Also, how should I behave once the deed is over? Should I just turn over, cuddle,etc? Just to send the message that I don't want her as a GF, but without implying that she's garbage once it's done

 

[Big Daddy]

Re: I'll have my first lay in a week... which is also my first time at all. Tips

The Post-Coital Tone