I'm doing something wrong

[ramirezs316]

So the last couple of numbers I've gotten over the weeks, I've found out that the girl has a boyfriend.

Two months ago, I was flirting with a hot bartender, having fun with her that I remembered her name. When I came back that night, I made her guess my name and then asked her for her number so she'd "remember me." She gave it and even came out from the bar to give me a hug. Scoped her out on facebook and found out she has a boyfriend of three years. I texted her a little but could tell she wasn't worth it.

Two weeks ago, I chat up a girl at a bar with her two girl friends and one guy friend. She's a little drunk but I deep dive her and we have a lot in common. One of her friends tries to pull her out of the conversation, but I get her interest back on me. By the end of the conversation, I have my whole arm around her waist. She agrees to have a drink with me sometime, and I get her full name (always a good sign) and number. I texted her the day after, following Chase's rubric to the tee. Nothing. Texted again and waited a day. Nothing. Tried 3 days later and nothing. Scoped her out on facebook, and it looks like she is together with the guy that I thought was only her guy friend that night.

Friday, I'm at work taking photos of an event. We have volunteer groups from the local university there. One is a table of 10 blonde girls. I take their group picture then start chatting up this tall, cute girl. She starts asking me about my work, and I get her name. On my next pass at the table, I do some deep diving. She's completely engaged, so I ask her out for a drink and get her number. She responded to my text later that day but when I checked facebook, I see that she has a boyfriend.

Is this something girls still do even when they're with other guys? I still think I need to work on my sexual vibes a little, but I've been getting compliance like crazy and have been pushing for dates before numbers. Why are some of these girls still agreeing to dates? Is it still worth if I know she's with someone?

 

[Estate]

I've been there too man,
Sometimes you meet these girls and sometimes you even feel like you are on a streak of meeting so many of them. Yes, even when girls have boyfriends, if you are doing REALLY good with them and they are into you, they can play along and show signs of interest, give you numbers, even date you. But often they will not actually leave their boyfriend for you.

To be honest, I just walk away from these girls, I have no interest in the drama of chasing a girl in a relationship.

But sometimes it's just luck (or lack of) that you happen to run into these girls a lot. Sometimes it might be about how or where you are approaching though. Girls in relationships can sometimes seem more approachable in bars, same with guys since they aren't with friends and scoping around, they are just open to chatting to people and not worrying about it. Maybe try different venues or think about how you are meeting these girls, sometimes there is something to that.

 

[Smurf]

Hey man,

Like Estate said, it might be your choice of venue. Try day gaming and it might be better, because girls will be more likely to tell you what's up. It also depends how your morals are. If they don't say anything and you can get them on a date, why worry about it? On the other hand, if you don't feel like dealing with drama like Estate said, don't. One other factor is what you're looking for. If it's a LTR obviously drop them, but if it's just quick things and you're successful, why not if they're boyfriend is obviously doing something wrong?

But IMO day game fixes this mostly because girls won't expect it, and will usually be upfront with you.

Jake.

 

[ramirezs316]

Hey man,

Like Estate said, it might be your choice of venue. Try day gaming and it might be better, because girls will be more likely to tell you what's up. It also depends how your morals are. If they don't say anything and you can get them on a date, why worry about it? On the other hand, if you don't feel like dealing with drama like Estate said, don't. One other factor is what you're looking for. If it's a LTR obviously drop them, but if it's just quick things and you're successful, why not if they're boyfriend is obviously doing something wrong?

But IMO day game fixes this mostly because girls won't expect it, and will usually be upfront with you.

Jake.

The volunteer girl at my work was during the day, lol. I'd be fine about this if the girls were texting me back and following through. I honestly think I'd still go for it. The problem is they're agreeing to dates, giving me their numbers, and just wasting my time.

 

[devlish]

My friends say I'm cursed because when I'm out I talk to a lot of pretty girls but almost all have boyfriends. If they give you their number and give good signals to you just try and get them out on their your own, just try as hard as you usually would (which hopefully isn't that hard), like any normal girl.

You will eventually meet hot girls without boyfriends, there's so many out there.

 

[PrettyDecent]

ramirezs316,

The volunteer girl at my work was during the day, lol. I'd be fine about this if the girls were texting me back and following through. I honestly think I'd still go for it. The problem is they're agreeing to dates, giving me their numbers, and just wasting my time.

True man, these girls are frustrating at times; like, just tell me if you've got a dude and I'll move on! is usually what I'm thinking. But I also think they provide good social momentum, and also generate some nice pre-selection for other women nearby.

If you want to bypass that altogether you could either A.) Open by asking her if she's single or B.) Weave the question into a conversation (Think of a story that involves couples doing things together, and throw in the question as if to relate the fact she's single).

Personally, I'm trying to figure how sexual I should be during the first encounter. It probably depends on the girl, but my guess as a rule of thumb is: very sexual, at least by the end. So escalating the vibe sexually (getting close to her, making strong sexual EC, etc.) will probably weed girls in faithful relationships out.

~Nick