- Joined
- Feb 12, 2015
- Messages
- 106
I've been struggling with being more assertive and dominant, and even just plain aggressive lately. I like Chase's article, but I think it was better at describing the problem, rather than actually solving it.
I'm not going to lie here, my looks are pretty striking, and combined with my appearance, I noticed that I can come off a bit intimidating. So as a result, I believe my vibe does NOT match with my outfit or the way I present myself. I do dress as a bit of a rebel/tough guy and that matches with my non-verbals, but my verbal game (especially with openers, deep diving, etc.) does NOT match with my appearance.
I try to talk politely (albeit in firmly) with new people, but my voice tends to be unexpectedly soft. Again, I'm not trying to brag, but I'm convinced that I am highly attractive. So sometimes I forget that and when I see a girl is intimated during a pick-up attempt, I get a little nervous myself, give up halfway through the conversation, and beat myself up a little over what I thought was rejection (I get it, I'm developing a new mentality, chill).
For example, I approached a girl one time and told her that she had the cutest eyes (lol yeah I know, I was short on material). She couldn't say anything except "thank you" and just stared at me the entire interaction. Her friend had to intervene and say "Yeah her boyfriend thinks so too." But instead of being persistent and asking her if that was true (and if her friend was just being a c*ck-block), I just gave up and moved on.
I think that's also off-putting to girls when they see a bad boy walk up to them, but then notice that his verbal game doesn't match up with his non-verbals. And, aside from having an intimidating-bordering-on-creepy vibe, I think the ultimate issue is that it doesn't seem authentic.
I know I can be a dominant/aggressive man, but occasionally, my nerves tend to betray me around hot girls, resulting in a bit of a dissonant vibe.
I saw these videos:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JqoAtzTIgGA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QhbOjDsHCpc
and I feel like this style of game would feel waaaay more natural then trying to smooth talk ladies.
So I want to be able to get my non-verbals to match with my verbals. Instead of changing my outfit, attitude, and non-verbal movement, I think it would be better to make my verbal game more aggressive, persistent, and extremely bold.
In one of Chase's articles, he talks about one of his friends ONLY using non-verbal game to get girls. Now, I don't want to throw my wit away, but I want to have more of a focus on using kino and having a dominant personality, because I feel that girls would become much less nervous around me if I were more consistent in my vibe and I would be a lot more successful in my game.
Basically, I want to take the dominant traits I already have, and flesh them out more and become even more dominant/aggressive/unapologetic so it will match with my overall appearance.
Are they any tips or any ways I can practice doing this?
EDIT: I also forgot to mention I want to be more aggressive in my kino.
I'm not going to lie here, my looks are pretty striking, and combined with my appearance, I noticed that I can come off a bit intimidating. So as a result, I believe my vibe does NOT match with my outfit or the way I present myself. I do dress as a bit of a rebel/tough guy and that matches with my non-verbals, but my verbal game (especially with openers, deep diving, etc.) does NOT match with my appearance.
I try to talk politely (albeit in firmly) with new people, but my voice tends to be unexpectedly soft. Again, I'm not trying to brag, but I'm convinced that I am highly attractive. So sometimes I forget that and when I see a girl is intimated during a pick-up attempt, I get a little nervous myself, give up halfway through the conversation, and beat myself up a little over what I thought was rejection (I get it, I'm developing a new mentality, chill).
For example, I approached a girl one time and told her that she had the cutest eyes (lol yeah I know, I was short on material). She couldn't say anything except "thank you" and just stared at me the entire interaction. Her friend had to intervene and say "Yeah her boyfriend thinks so too." But instead of being persistent and asking her if that was true (and if her friend was just being a c*ck-block), I just gave up and moved on.
I think that's also off-putting to girls when they see a bad boy walk up to them, but then notice that his verbal game doesn't match up with his non-verbals. And, aside from having an intimidating-bordering-on-creepy vibe, I think the ultimate issue is that it doesn't seem authentic.
I know I can be a dominant/aggressive man, but occasionally, my nerves tend to betray me around hot girls, resulting in a bit of a dissonant vibe.
I saw these videos:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JqoAtzTIgGA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QhbOjDsHCpc
and I feel like this style of game would feel waaaay more natural then trying to smooth talk ladies.
So I want to be able to get my non-verbals to match with my verbals. Instead of changing my outfit, attitude, and non-verbal movement, I think it would be better to make my verbal game more aggressive, persistent, and extremely bold.
In one of Chase's articles, he talks about one of his friends ONLY using non-verbal game to get girls. Now, I don't want to throw my wit away, but I want to have more of a focus on using kino and having a dominant personality, because I feel that girls would become much less nervous around me if I were more consistent in my vibe and I would be a lot more successful in my game.
Basically, I want to take the dominant traits I already have, and flesh them out more and become even more dominant/aggressive/unapologetic so it will match with my overall appearance.
Are they any tips or any ways I can practice doing this?
EDIT: I also forgot to mention I want to be more aggressive in my kino.
